So Sorry!!!

LyndsieRae

I am sure many of you are wondering what has happened to me!!! The last week has been a complete blur! Thank you so much for all of your emails and encouraging notes!!! I did get them! I am so sorry for not responding before now! I have had a rough week emotionally and spiritually. It seemed like every where I turned someone was calling, coming over, emailing me or something to try to tell me about this doctor and that hospital and what I should and shouldn't do as far as chemo! It was just too much! I couldn't handle it anymore! I should have started chemo today but I decided to wait a week. I just needed some time! I needed a day to just be normal! My Momma and I went out yesterday and had the best time together!!! We didn't talk about chemo, we didn't talk about cancer. I felt like my old self before surgery. It was wonderful!!! And the Lord just knew I needed that! My doctor was fine with me waiting a week. Actually it worked out for the best. I still went in to see him this morning because he had some news for us. My chemo treatment was going to change. Before I was going to be taking Taxol and Carboplatin. But my cancer is such a rare case. So anyway, he talked with a hospital in Houston. And from what I hear this is the best of the best. All of my meds have changed and instead of taking my chemo one day with a drip of 6 hours and every 21 days. I will go in every other week and have to stay in the hospital 2 days. There were some good things and not so good things that came to mind when I heard all of this today! I hated that I would be doing chemo for 2 days! But I may not lose my hair with these new drugs. That was good and I also felt like if I was staying in the hospital and had any reactions or if I was sick then they would be able to help me! I am worried about it being SO much chemo though! 44 Hours is a loooong time! I wonder if the side effects are going to be worse since it is so strong! I don't know, I know everyone is different so I don't want to compare. I guess I will just have to wait and see what happens. I will start next Wednesday and will be able to go home late on Friday! Be praying for me as I just take one day at a time! I am doing much better though! Physically and emotionally! I think I just needed some time to sort through it all! Daniel comes this weekend and I can't wait!!! It is our anniversary! : ) So he has something romantic planned!! I'll update y'all soon! In the mean time if anyone is wanting day by day updates just check my website! www.danielandlyndsie.blogspot.com. By the way, I got all of my hair cut off! There are pictures on the site! You will have to tell me what you think! Hope you are all doing good! Miss Jenna You have been on my heart and mind! I am praying for you and look forward to talk to you sooooon!!!! : )

mopar

No need to apologize! This is a very difficult time, an emotional rollercoaster, very overwhelming. How wonderful you had an opportunity to spend a 'mental health' day with your Mom. What a blessing. And it sounds like your doctor is on top of things, and you have the best treatment ready and waiting for you. I know spending time in the hospital won't exactly be what you had hoped for, but God's plan isn't always our plan. Nonetheless, His plan is the BEST plan!
So, you just enjoy your anniversary celebration. Soak up life and love, and it will all carry you through this journey. Let us know how you are doing once you get started!
Luv, Hugs & Prayers!
Monika
P.S. I LOVE YOUR HAIR!

saundra

Maybe God wanted you on this new treatment. I choose to believe that this is going to be the best for you. He is in control of your health, but you have to control how many phone calls you take. I personally turn off the ringer of my phone from 1-3 every afternoon, to read, pray, and sometimes nap but it is MY TIME. Hugs and prayers coming your way... Saundra

kris43

Lyndsie - it is so good to hear from you. You sound very upbeat and confident with what you have decided to do. That is the 1/2 of it when it comes to treatment I think.

I am so glad that you could spend the day with your mom and I'm sure you and Daniel will have a great time this weekend.

I remember that whenever I got together with my friends or family I would request we talk about things other then my cancer - or I would give a brief description of what was going on and then start a new conversation. I told my youngest brother who couldn't be with me during treatment that it's like getting married, or being pregnant - you can't remember what you talked about before these things happened because it is all consuming. You ARE NOT your cancer.

I hope you have a wonderful weekend and keep posting so we know how you are doing. You will have many people sending good thoughts your way.

Take care.
Kris