lifeline

Unknown

babs49242 said:

Joyce..I like the JOY part of your name! there must be a reason for it...You will be JOYful again. I listened to mind relaxing CD's during my 'depression' time. I would just get lost in them and forget aobut the world. I still listen to them on hard days. I also got panic attacks ie: getting germs from the shopping carts handles, people breathing on me, and forget where I was going(I would have to stop along the side of the road to regroup! hahaha). I was also put on anti depressants, no big deal as long as they made me feel 'happy'.
Prayers for you are being lifted. May angels surround you to lighten your load.
Cindie

If there are angels surrounding me, surely you are one of them! Thank you. I haven't gotten lost on the side of the road - but some of the "mistakes" I make at work are truly the work of chemo. Thank goodness for an understanding boss.
JOYce

kbc4869

unknown said:

Your timetable of depression is just like mine. Now, at least, I can set my clock by it and say things like "Gee, no, I can't make it for coffee on THursday. I will be depressed that day. But I should feel fine on Saturday, how 'bout then?" I too enjoy gardening and the weather is just about to switch over to gardening weather here, just as I am just about to finish chemo. Surely, that is grounds for a partnership!
Thank you so much for replying.
Joyce

Better yet: accept that invite to coffee on Thursday -- no matter how down you feel. It's a diversion. Maybe your friend will have something funny to say and you'll laugh! Even if you laugh once and for a short period of time, it's a victory. And the Beast hates laughter, so do it as often as possible!

P.S. I loved your poem.

Kim

DAArps123

I too am getting towards the end of my chemo treatments. I have just finished #5 out of 6. I'm glad to hear that I'm not the only one feeling the gloom towards the end of treatments. I think that our bodies get a little more "worn out" with each successive chemo tx and a worn out body can lead to negative thoughts. I am a worrier too. I worry about everything! Always have. I think my worries of "what if the chemo didn't get it all" and "what if my upcoming bilateral mastectomy and reconstruction surgery has a bad result or even worse, I die from it or whatever". I think the what if's in my future make me down too. I think we just have to keep reminding ourselves to take life 1 day at a time and what is meant to happen will happen. I plan on living until I'm 93 years old. I also have many, many plans to change my life for the better after I've recovered. I plan to give more than I recieve and I plan to help others. Personally, I am going to dedicate 1 day every month to playing the piano at nursing homes and I plan to volunteer 1 day every week at the Children's Mercy Hospital with kids going through chemo. I think giving of yourself makes you happy! Try getting out and helping someone in need. It is bound to bring your spirits up. Good luck. DeeDee