New Diagnosis
Comments
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Mickey,
First let me say "Welcome", and sorry we have to meet under these curcumstances. Yes you are young, and I can't give any advice being that I was 46 at my dx. and had no plans of having any more kids. I know this is hard to handle, but you'll make it through,time has a way of healing some wounds.My sister lost her only daughter , to murder...she will never have any more kids and she'll never have any grandkids...but she makes it through each day,somedays are easier than others she said.
Living with this disease is hard,I'm not gonna sugar coat it,some of us go into remission and then there are some of us who seem to never come off chemo, but we all are still here and living. Time like you said helps alot,having this support group and the many others out there also help. This disease may not be curable, but it is treatable!!! I pray alot for strength to make it another day, and for all of us affected by this crummy disease.
Hang in there..you have a husband who loves you!!And alot of OVCA sisters who will pray for you. Have a good holiday, and a healthy and pain free New Year....(((hugz)))...Joanne0 -
Mickey:
I hope Joanne's words brought you some comfort. I would also hope that what I have to offer will give some peace in a very difficult situation.
My daughter is suffering from a very severe case of endometriosis (she is 26). Besides all the pain and problems it brings, she and her husband must now face that fact that she may never be able to have children. She also faces a probable hysterectomy. I just wanted you to know that you are not alone. While this may not make it any easier to know that, as Joanne said there are many that you can talk to and share you feelings with. Sometimes, that helps to discover coping tools that others have used.
Regarding the cancer, unfortunately once you have had it, you will always have that concern of a recurrance. In time, it will no longer consume you every moment of every day. You will find a way to work through your fears and axieties, and learn to leave each moment of life to the fullest. You will find a way to face whatever may lie ahead of you. Taking an active part in your health with good nutrition, exercise, regular check-ups, will allow you to take comfort in the fact that you are doing everything you can for yourself. Beyond that, all is in God's hands. And hopefully you have a source of faith and strength that will sustain you. And hopefully, you also have a supportive husband and family.
Don't let the cancer become your identity. That's a very easy thing to do. We become so consumed with treatment, surgery, being watchful, etc. that it's all we are doing and all we seem to be. Again, one moment at a time, each day to the fullest. That's when you will find the balance.
I am so glad you find this website. There are so many here to support you, lend a hug, prayers, and offer hope and suggestions. To you and yours, a very Merry Christmas and a joyful, hopeful, healthful New Year!
(((HUGS)))
Monika0 -
Oh, Mickey, I am so sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I, too, was stage 3c. I was diagnosed in May '06. I had the huge surgery like you did, and then 6 rounds of chemo.
I wish I could tell you how to get it out of your head, but I haven't figued that out myself yet. (By the way, I'm 49; 48 when diagnosed. Seems alot more fair than 27! If there is such a thing as "fair" in cancer.) I'm so sorry you lost your fertility; maybe you can adopt someday, although I know that's not the same.
I hope your husband is very supportive as well as your loved ones around you. I can tell you, this site is wonderful for giving support and information, and I only found it a short time ago.
The days that you feel good, just live as much as you can, as normally as you can. And if/when cancer rears it's ugly head, then you can go back to that. It's been an emotional roller-coaster for me. I am about to enter my 2nd round of treatments, and hoping upon hope it'll be my last. I find that it helps to plan vacations and things to look forward to after treatment.
I wish you only the best, and your family, too, as they are going through this as well.
Have the best possible Christmas & New Year's, okay? And know we're here for you. ((hugs)) ~Susan0 -
This comment has been removed by the Moderatormickey403 said:Thank you everyone for your responses. I have read each response over and over again. Reading all of your words of advice, made me feel like I was not alone. I can tell that you are all very strong women. Thank you for your support and kind words. Happy New Year.
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Hi Mickey,
I am new to this website, and I came across this thread, and I wanted to repsond to you because I was only 34 when I was dx, (2 1/2 years ago), and I had to mourn the loss of being able to have any more children, I do have a son who is 11 and my husband and I tried and tried to have another baby and it never happened and then along came OvaCa and now it will never happen, and at first I was angry about that, but then I realized what a small price to pay to be alive. We are also in the process of adopting a little boy whom we received in May of 2006 just 4 months after my last treatment, he was only 7 months old at that time and I have to say he was the best thing that came out of my cancer experience. There are alot of children out there that need loving homes, and I would suggest looking into adoption. I have been cancer free for over 2 years now, and I find that I think about reoccurence less and less, it just takes time and understandbly so, focus on the positive and always have faith...don't let the "What If's" consume you, it will drive you crazy, when I was going through treatment my husband said something to me on one of my down days that I will never forget, he told me you have two choices you can get busy living, or get busy dying....I feel that I got a second chance and I am going to make the most out of each and every day!!!!
Also, I want you to know that if you ever want to chat, vent, or have any questions, that I am here to offer support.
Sending Prayers and Hugs your way,
Leslie0 -
Thank you Leslie for your response. I'm sorry that I did not respond until now. It has been a while since I have been on the website. Your words were very encouraging. Its nice to know that someone else understands what I'm going through. I know that its cliche, but it does make me feel like I am not alone. My husband and I plan to adopt someday, however this is still pretty new and fresh and so although we very much want to have children, its very hard to accept that we will have children through adoption. I feel guitly because I can not give my husband his own biological children. He is very supportive, so I know its something that we will work through together. Thank you for sharing your story with me.curlyq1971 said:Hi Mickey,
I am new to this website, and I came across this thread, and I wanted to repsond to you because I was only 34 when I was dx, (2 1/2 years ago), and I had to mourn the loss of being able to have any more children, I do have a son who is 11 and my husband and I tried and tried to have another baby and it never happened and then along came OvaCa and now it will never happen, and at first I was angry about that, but then I realized what a small price to pay to be alive. We are also in the process of adopting a little boy whom we received in May of 2006 just 4 months after my last treatment, he was only 7 months old at that time and I have to say he was the best thing that came out of my cancer experience. There are alot of children out there that need loving homes, and I would suggest looking into adoption. I have been cancer free for over 2 years now, and I find that I think about reoccurence less and less, it just takes time and understandbly so, focus on the positive and always have faith...don't let the "What If's" consume you, it will drive you crazy, when I was going through treatment my husband said something to me on one of my down days that I will never forget, he told me you have two choices you can get busy living, or get busy dying....I feel that I got a second chance and I am going to make the most out of each and every day!!!!
Also, I want you to know that if you ever want to chat, vent, or have any questions, that I am here to offer support.
Sending Prayers and Hugs your way,
Leslie0
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