Second time around ...
jmears
Member Posts: 266
Hi - I went back and read a string about fear. One of the top were about recurrance and having to go through the treatments again. As you see in my previous post I have recurrance and the treatments althought many have not been nearly as horrible as the first protocal. I haven lost my hair ...I haven't missed work except for appointments. Sometimes I wonder why the treatment for recurrance and mets seems "lighter" than for the original diagnosis. I just wanted some to know that you can do it again. But as my previous post ...I am very afraid of the unknown.
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Comments
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It seems to me that the single biggest fear any cancer survivor has is recurrance. It's funny, we know we can survive it, but we fear it, none the less. It may be because some of the treatments are so bad. But, I didn't even have to go through the treatments so many of you did, and still I fear it coming back, so I don't THINK it's the treatment that scares us. I guess that's why we're all here, for encouragement.0
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Honey, we are all afraid of the unknown. I really think that for myself this is a "spiritual/mind" journey. I don't want to spend the rest of my life chasing this thing around. Sometimes I think, let be what will be. If I'm to go then let's get it over with. I wonder if I will have the "energy" to go through this again. There are many attitudes to take and I can have all of them in the same day.
It's hard not to let fear guide us. After my chemo I wanted to start on an aromatase Inhibitor. My onc likes the 21/2 yrs of tamoxifen and then the AI. However he was going to concede and let me start the AI provided my bones were good. That's when I found out I had Osteoporosis.
And now I'm stuck on tamoxifen for the duration I expect as I don't think I can get my bones back enough for the AI. I really didn't want tamoxifen
and I do expect I will have a recurrance.
I too was stage 2b. They said it was curative. I think that is why they are aggressive. Mets is not curative in the same sense, I think they just try and hold it back. Perhaps someone else can confirm this or not.
One thing I do try and hold on to that has come to me throughout all this is: We are not our body, we are not our cancer, nor our hair and in a way it all just doesn't matter. Then I come back down to earth
I do hope it turns out well for you and you have many many smiley years ahead.
jan0
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