scared out of my mind

2ndtime

I've been through colon cancer but now breast cancer. I've never been so scared!!! I had my daughters help during the first cancer but not this one and I don't know if I can do it!!! I've concided no treatment....

JUSTAWORD

Hi 2ndtime, I am so sorry to hear that you are again dx with a cancer. Please please dont give up. If not for yourself, your children. I am just starting out on my first journey in to the unknown I have breast cancer. I am awaiting my 2nd chemo treatment, but look forward to my last. Life is a gamble throughout ALL OF OUR LIVES. I think if we know what were up against it makes us Love, Laugh and Enjoy our lives more. It those people who live everyday thinking that tomorrow is promised to them I feel sorry for. But you've been thru it once already, be strong and know that you will again prevail. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and those of us that might have to do it again. Keep your faith and remember life is worth living. We all have to stuggle in one way or another it makes us appreciate everyday so much more. May God Carry you in his arms when you feel weak and hold your hand when you see the finish line. Take care be strong.

mc2001

2ndtime,
Please don't give up! There are many good medicines to fight the negative side effects of treatment. Find a good cancer treatment center near you. You can do this. Please give it at least an attempt at treatment. I am praying for you.
-Michael (leukemia survivor)

Susan956

Dear 2ndtime,
You will have to find Kathy M, she has taken the trip that you are on and is now doing well. She had the two cancer's back to back. I am sure that she will see your post soon. but if not email her.

I know that you will be able to muster your courage and fight the beast again. You will find many of us here who will be glad to hold your hand as your walk down this path. While it is a path that is no fun... It is one that so many of us have walked successfully and many of us have found things out about ourselves that we never knew... We learned perspective... how to love deeper....

Take Care... God Bless....

P.S. I wish I could find an old post for you it was a cute poem about a tea pot... I will look for it.

(((((Hugs)))))

Susan

24242

I too am sorry...
I remember when I was 36 and was diagnosed with my stage 3 breast cancer that had spread after a lump was dx'd fibrous instead of the cancer it truly was.
Yes I too had the same thoughts but at the time my son was young and he needed me more than he ever had. Sometimes it isn't about us even though we are the very one's suffering and having to cope in some unthinkable ways. I too wonder if I could ever face going through it all again but know we have to find ways to be grateful and that changes our purspective on life.
My mother asked at the time of my bc dx if I was praying and I said I really did all along. She said the power of prayer might be needed.
Cancer can do two things for us and that is it can make things clearer and we truly understand the things we have control over and things we do not or it can make us sinical something that won't help us in the end.
Simply, "Where there is a garden, there is HOPE!!!"
I will be keeping you close to heart,
Tara

KathiM

So, another semi-colon turned PINK! Susan was right, I was rectal cancer followed by stage IIb breast cancer...3 months after my resection. Truth be told, I had had the lump in my breast for over 10 years...just decided to join the colon and turn bad...sigh....

Yes, you CAN do it....a great quote from my 5th 'second opinion'...(I tried to find someone who would say no chemo...sigh) Dr. at UCLA breast center...."You fought such a battle the first time against bad odds, and beat it...why would you risk all of that work this time by doing less than everything to beat this one, too!"

That said, I got to my 4th Adriamycin/Cytoxin, and said "No More". My onc wisely said...ok...we will pass on the last AC, but at least TRY the Taxol...I did all 4.

Read my page, I am NO HERO...just less afraid of the treatment, than of the alternative!

If you have chemo in store:Water. 2 quarts a day. ESPECIALLY the day before, day of, day after infusion. I would be using the restroom at least 5 times each infusion day!!! Also VERY GOOD for the colon!!!! Keeps me regular.

I'm not going to lie and say it was easy, but I am now, 2 years after diagnosis, NED (No Evidence of Disease) on both, and am celebrating my first holidays without being in treatment.

One more thing. If chemo is in store....get a copy of all of your labs. I followed mine...my white count went south...

Please feel free to e-mail me here....

Hugs, Kathi

ireneingeorgia

Dear 2nd time, any time you hear the name of the beast it's scarey. I finished my chemo for breast cancer the last day in August. Don't give up, you too can make it through. We're all here for you, and survival rates are so much better today. We will pray for you and for your family and hope you go forward to beat the beast.
Love
Irene

Mich1417

Yes, yes, 2ndtime...ditto to everything everyone said! I'm a 2nd time breast cancer survivor going through my 3rd of 6 chemo treatments. Going through the 3rd of my 6 chemo treatments the first time over 2 and 1/2 years ago...I said to myself...never again! I didn't think I could go through this again. But, here I am, with the never quit attitude and getting through more chemo. You really learn how to get through the chemo better and better. I look at it this way...4 months of treatments is not a long time for a long lifetime. I plan to live to 100+, so 4 months out of that time isn't bad. Whatever it takes.
You can do it...we are here to help! Livestrong!

kathydaly

Yes, yes 2nd, everyone has said all the imp. things I don't know what else to add really but:
But please don't quit 15 min.'s before the miracle.
Also, I am here for you too, a 3x's survivor.
Many prayers and much love, Kathy

Unknown

I had breast cancer twice. Less than 2 years apart. Two radical mastectomies, chemo, radiation, tamoxifin for 7 years. It is now 20....yes 20 years since I was first diagnosed.
This is why you HAVE to do it. You have so much to look forward to. I just think of what I would have missed if I had given up too soon.
God be with you dear.

inkblot

Dear 2ndtime,

All the ladies here have given you some great encouragement! Please give it all some thought.

I can imagine how you must feel. I've only been round the horn once, so cannot say what I'd do if a 2nd time presented itself to me. I may well eschew the medical approach altogether and then again, I may not. I don't think any of us can say what we'd do, until such a time was at hand.

You didn't say what your dx is or if you've had biopsy/surgery of any kind yet.

Depending upon the details, maybe you'd want to consider looking into something a bit different for the 2nd time treatment? Have you thought about Integrative medical treatment? Alternative treatment? If you know the Stage of your bc, it's possible that nothing more than radiation may be suggested, post surgery. Or, if DCIS, then maybe nothing beyond surgery, as has been the case for some women I've known. I can tell you that radiation isn't always difficult. That part of treatment happened to be easy for me. Taking excellent care of your diet, with supplements and exercise and incorporating relaxation into your daily routine can really help a lot.

If your colon cancer treatment was recent, then it's certainly still very fresh in your mind and may be contributing to your decision of no treatment?

On the flip side of that, do you recall how great you felt, inside, after you'd completed treatment the first time? Granted, that feeling may not be quite enough motivation to re-consider here, but at least think about it?

I know you're terrified. We use the word "scared" a lot but I think terrified is more on target, most times. Try to remember that because you're so scared, you're not in your best frame of mind to be rendering your final verdict about treatment(s) just yet? Give yourself some time and think it all through carefully. Give yourself time to calm a bit and get your wits about you. You're shocked right now and bowled over by the idea of having cancer yet again. Maybe see a good counselor to help you through the tangle of emotions, in addition to a 2nd medical opinion about it all. Bear in mind that there's more than one way to approach this, which may be effective and suitable to you as well. While it must be your choice, you want it to be your best choice. Try not to make any knee-jerk decisions while you're so upset. Same applies, for far less threatening things in life than cancer, as you know, so it certainly applies here.

This board boasts some great ladies with some great compassion, understanding and caring and everyone is here for you. Hope that you will visit often. Just to rant, cry, talk, share or whatever your need of the moment may be. We all do that here and it can help tremendously to pour it all out, where you're safe among friends, understood and respected.

Please know that many hearts are with you and that we care.

Love, light and laughter,
Ink