Am I going off my head

tamlin
tamlin Member Posts: 4
edited March 2014 in Skin Cancer #1
I was diagnosed with subungual malignant melanoma 4mm thick on February.Since then I have had my toe amputated and a bit of bone taken from my foot.I have made an excellent recovery from the surgery. Everyone kept telling me how amazed they were at how I coped with the diagnosis and treatment, and i must say i surprised myself. I kept everything as normal as possble and kept positive throughout. But now its a different story, I have had my path report and ct scan and told I have the all clear, although i still have to go to my hospital every 3 months for the next 5 years and also the beatson cancer clinic every 3 months, but to me thats peace of mind.What the hell is wrong with me? I feel so guilty as there are people out there alot worse off than me. I should be on top of the world, shouting from the roof tops - Ive got the all clear!!I just feel so down now. I have this big heavy weight in my tummy and it wont go.I dont want to talk to my family, friends as they are so happy for me.

Comments

  • Carvs
    Carvs Member Posts: 30
    #2
    No you are NOT going off your head. From my point of view what you are feeling is totally normal. My melanoma primary was at least 6.9 mm thick and I had 2.8 mm residual melanoma and one positive node. My one year PET/CT scan showed no evidence of metastatic or recurrent disease. I felt like I should be more relieved than I was. It's so hard with a cancer like melanoma not to worry but hopefully with time it will get better. Another place to find people who know how you feel is the MPIP, a very active board dedicated to melanoma. The web address is http://www.mpip.org/bb/bbindex.html
    My very best wishes to you, Carver
  • tamlin
    tamlin Member Posts: 4
    #3
    Carvs said:

    No you are NOT going off your head. From my point of view what you are feeling is totally normal. My melanoma primary was at least 6.9 mm thick and I had 2.8 mm residual melanoma and one positive node. My one year PET/CT scan showed no evidence of metastatic or recurrent disease. I felt like I should be more relieved than I was. It's so hard with a cancer like melanoma not to worry but hopefully with time it will get better. Another place to find people who know how you feel is the MPIP, a very active board dedicated to melanoma. The web address is http://www.mpip.org/bb/bbindex.html
    My very best wishes to you, Carver

    Thank you so much for your reply Carver. I shall certainly give this website a try.I think I just feel so guilty at the feelings i have right now, thus not being able to talk to anyone.

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