Survivor AND caregiver

Unknown
Unknown
edited March 2014 in Caregivers #1
I had 3 cancer diagnoses over a period of 10 years. I have been caregiver for both my disabled parents for several years until my mother passed away a year ago. I still look after Dad. He is not hard to care for right now, but I still get so emotionally drained just knowing that everything I do and plan must first be adjusted to his schedule and his needs.
I feel selfish and guilty...after all he and Mom helped me out a lot when I was having chemo, etc.
Can anyone suggest ways I can be a caregiver for myself without shortchanging Dad?

Comments

  • CareTALKgals
    CareTALKgals Member Posts: 2
    #2
    Zahalene,

    There are many who are going through the same emotions you are going through - they are thrust into the role of informal caregiver which they may or may not have been prepared for yet they must do because it's for the care of a loved on. Boomers and Xers are going to be thrust into this role increasingly. Yet how do you reconcile that responsibility with your career, family, friends, and yet have some time for yourself? That's why CareTALK Inc was founded (www.CareTALK.com) -- to help caregivers like yourself cope with all the responsibilities so that you don't feel overburdened and stressed, thus leading to the feelings of selfishness and, consequently, guilt for having those feelings.

    I would say check out this article: http://www.caretalk.com/en/lifestyle/Mind/stress/prevent_stress.html
    It's titled, "Prevent Caregiver stress and burnout". I also think the whole "Lifestyle" section will be useful for you- it contains articles regarding on how to take care of yourself, the caregiver.

    Best,

    The CareTALK gals
    www.CareTALK.com

    PS. Spread the word about this new site and let me know if you find it useful.
  • mamacitadice
    mamacitadice Member Posts: 4
    #3
    Hi Zahalane, I am in the same type of position but with hubby.Stay positive first of all. You might want to look into adult day care programs for your Dad this way while he is enjoyiny out of home time with others his own age and well supervised. You can have time to put you first for resting at home with a good book or a girl friend afternoon. Both of which I am sure you deserve.

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