My dad has cancer!! Help

Daddysgirl05

I have been searching for sites that would be of some support or to inspire me about stomach cancer and there is not much out there....
My father was just diagnosed with stomach cancer and had his whole stomach removed on August 4th, 2005.... He has had all the symptoms and was tested positive with the H. Pylori bacteria months ago. He also had an ultrasound done and he was told not to eat the night before which he did not and the woman doing it said that his stomach looked full and he informed her that he did not eat which was very odd ( you would think this would ring a bell to look into it a lil further) anyways so his doctor put him on strong antibiotics treating a stomach ulcer taking 16 pills a day for months.... Which his symptoms grew worse and he began to throw up blood and he took himself to the emergency where they said he had a hole in his stomach and wheeled him away to do emergency surgery to repair it... As we wait in the waiting room not thinking the worst considering cancer was never ever said to any of us including him.... The doc came back to tell us that he has the worse case of stomach cancer and they removed his whole stomach and 19 lymth nodes and 17 of those had cancer in them, and that he may not survive after this operation... He is now home and doing okay from the surgery besides the fact that they say he has a leak but we have no clue on what is to come and what to expect... He has not started chemo yet. I would love some info if anyone has any or inspiring stories... Also does anyone think the docs should have had a clue any sooner? We find it odd!

AuthorUnknown

Hello,

You may want to search the personal web pages of our members to learn more about their experiences. To do this, click on "Personal Web Pages" on the left hand side of this page. You can then enter the search criteria you are looking for. If you find someone you would like to learn more about, you can also contact them through the CSN internal email system.

I wish you father well in his recovery.

Take care and be well,

Dana
CSN Dana

ZELLARS

HI I HAVEN'T VISITED THIS SITE IN MANY MONTHS BUT SOMETHING TOLD ME TO CHECK IT--I AM 31 YRS OLD AND THE HIGHEST DEGREE POSSIBLE OF BEING A DADDY'S GIRL. I REMEMBER GETTING ON THIS SITE FOR THE FIRST TIME WITH BASICALLY THE EXACT POST THAT YOU HAVE ENTERED. MY DAD TOO HAD SYMPTOMS THAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN MORE AGGRESSIVELY TREATED. I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I WOULD READ THINGS THAT WOULD SAY "IF YOU NEED SOMEONE TO TALK TO I AM HERE ETC." I WOULD FRANTICALLY BE THINKING HOW KIND THAT WAS BUT I REALLY NEEDED FAST HELP WITH MY DAD'S STOMACH CANCER. THE LACK OF INSPIRING STORIES IS VERY DISCOURAGING AND IT PAINS ME TO TELL YOU THAT I LOST MY 57 YR OLD NON-SMOKING, CHRISTIAN, LOVING FATHER IN APRIL. AS I TYPE THAT I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE IT. NEVER GIVE UP HOPE AND DON'T LET ANYONE TAKE YOUR DAD'S AWAY. NO MATTER THE NEWS OF WE CAN'T DO THIS TREATMENT ETC. WE NEVER GAVE UP HOPE. I DIDN'T CARE IF THEY WERE TELLING HIM TO TRY VITAMIN B-12 IT WAS STILL THE FACT THAT THEY WOULD NEVER STOP TRYING SOMETHING.I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOUR FAITH AND BELIEFS ARE BUT GOD HAS WORKED IN MY WHOLE FAMILY'S HEARTS EVEN THOUGH OUR INITIAL PRAYER WASN'T ANSWERED. I WAS ANGRY--VERY ANGRY AND NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD BE WHERE I AM TODAY. I WILL LIST MY EMAIL ADDRESS THROUGH THE CANCER SOCIETY AND ALSO MY PHONE NUMBER. YOU MAY NOT WANT TO TALK RIGHT NOW YOU MAY JUST HAVE SOME QUESTIONS. YOU MAY NOT WANT TO TALK AT ALL BUT PLEASE KEEP MY CONTACT INFO. IF THERE IS EVER ANYTHING I CAN DO OR HELP YOU WITH. YOU, YOUR DAD, AND FAMILY ARE IN MY THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS. BETSY

Daddysgirl05

ZELLARS said:

HI I HAVEN'T VISITED THIS SITE IN MANY MONTHS BUT SOMETHING TOLD ME TO CHECK IT--I AM 31 YRS OLD AND THE HIGHEST DEGREE POSSIBLE OF BEING A DADDY'S GIRL. I REMEMBER GETTING ON THIS SITE FOR THE FIRST TIME WITH BASICALLY THE EXACT POST THAT YOU HAVE ENTERED. MY DAD TOO HAD SYMPTOMS THAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN MORE AGGRESSIVELY TREATED. I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I WOULD READ THINGS THAT WOULD SAY "IF YOU NEED SOMEONE TO TALK TO I AM HERE ETC." I WOULD FRANTICALLY BE THINKING HOW KIND THAT WAS BUT I REALLY NEEDED FAST HELP WITH MY DAD'S STOMACH CANCER. THE LACK OF INSPIRING STORIES IS VERY DISCOURAGING AND IT PAINS ME TO TELL YOU THAT I LOST MY 57 YR OLD NON-SMOKING, CHRISTIAN, LOVING FATHER IN APRIL. AS I TYPE THAT I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE IT. NEVER GIVE UP HOPE AND DON'T LET ANYONE TAKE YOUR DAD'S AWAY. NO MATTER THE NEWS OF WE CAN'T DO THIS TREATMENT ETC. WE NEVER GAVE UP HOPE. I DIDN'T CARE IF THEY WERE TELLING HIM TO TRY VITAMIN B-12 IT WAS STILL THE FACT THAT THEY WOULD NEVER STOP TRYING SOMETHING.I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOUR FAITH AND BELIEFS ARE BUT GOD HAS WORKED IN MY WHOLE FAMILY'S HEARTS EVEN THOUGH OUR INITIAL PRAYER WASN'T ANSWERED. I WAS ANGRY--VERY ANGRY AND NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD BE WHERE I AM TODAY. I WILL LIST MY EMAIL ADDRESS THROUGH THE CANCER SOCIETY AND ALSO MY PHONE NUMBER. YOU MAY NOT WANT TO TALK RIGHT NOW YOU MAY JUST HAVE SOME QUESTIONS. YOU MAY NOT WANT TO TALK AT ALL BUT PLEASE KEEP MY CONTACT INFO. IF THERE IS EVER ANYTHING I CAN DO OR HELP YOU WITH. YOU, YOUR DAD, AND FAMILY ARE IN MY THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS. BETSY

Hi betsy!!! Thank for your reply it was very incouraging... I am very sorry to hear about your father. I am scared of the worst, but I am praying everyday for the best!!! It is very hard to find positive storiesabout stomach cancer. My father is trying to keep positive but he is scared. We all keep telling him he has to be around for his grandbabies.. That has kept him going. I have a 4 month old and a 4 year old and he has also a 2 year old grandbaby.....I will keep you in my contacts, Thanks... What stage did your dad have? -Dawn

Daddysgirl05

AuthorUnknown said:

Hello,

You may want to search the personal web pages of our members to learn more about their experiences. To do this, click on "Personal Web Pages" on the left hand side of this page. You can then enter the search criteria you are looking for. If you find someone you would like to learn more about, you can also contact them through the CSN internal email system.

I wish you father well in his recovery.

Take care and be well,

Dana
CSN Dana

Thank you dana. That will be helpful!!!

ZELLARS

Daddysgirl05 said:

Hi betsy!!! Thank for your reply it was very incouraging... I am very sorry to hear about your father. I am scared of the worst, but I am praying everyday for the best!!! It is very hard to find positive storiesabout stomach cancer. My father is trying to keep positive but he is scared. We all keep telling him he has to be around for his grandbabies.. That has kept him going. I have a 4 month old and a 4 year old and he has also a 2 year old grandbaby.....I will keep you in my contacts, Thanks... What stage did your dad have? -Dawn

HI DAWN. WELL WHEN MY DAD WAS FIRST DIAGNOSED IN 2000 AND HAD SURGERY HE HAD PART OF HIS STOMACH REMOVED AND THEY SAID THEY HAD GOTTEN IT ALL AND IT WASN'T IN THE LYMPH NODES BUT IT WAS STAGED 2 BECAUSE SOME STRAY CELLS HAD GOTTEN ON THE OUTSIDE--HE HAD CHEMO AND RADIATION AFTERWARD AND DID FANTASTIC UNTIL IT CAME BACK 4 YRS LATER IN THE SAME EXACT SPOT. THEN HE HAD ALREADY HAD THE MAXIMUM AMOUNT OF RADIATION TO THAT AREA AND WITH CHEMO IT WOULD JUST BE TO KEEP HIM HERE LONGER. YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND THAT WE NEVER LET THE DRS. SAY GRIM NEWS AROUND HIM BUT ALSO THEY WEREN'T TELLING HIM THAT THERE WAS A WHOLE LOT THEY COULD DO. I DONT KNOW THE SPECIFICS OF YOUR DAD'S CASE AND I SOOO HOPE THAT YOU WON'T FIND THIS OFFENSIVE(THE ONLY REASON I AM TELLING YOU THIS IS BECAUSE I HAVE LIVED IT) YOU ARE SO RIGHT TO KEEP YOUR DAD'S SPIRITS UP--HOPE IS IMPORTANT AND NEVER FORGET THAT BUT SAYING "YOU HAVE TO BE AROUND FOR THE GRANDBABIES" ISNT GONG TO MAKE HIM FEEL BETTER--HE KNOWS THAT AND I KNOW THAT YOU SAY THAT TO ENCOURAGE HIM TO FIGHT--ITS JUST THAT THERE ARE THOSE WHO FIGHT THIS DREADED DISEASE WITH EVERYTHING THEY HAVE BUT ULTIMATELY IT IS IN GOD'S HANDS-HE HURTS ALSO TO SEE YOU HURTING AND THAT'S WHY IT IS IMPORTANT TO STAY STRONG AND SUPPORTIVE FOR HIM. I HOPE I HAVE MADE SOME SORT OF SENSE--ALSO PLEASE KNOW THAT YOU CAN ASK ME ANYTHING-AND I MEAN ANYTHING! IT HURTS SO MUCH. MY DAD WOULD PRAY THAT IF IT WS GOD'S WILL TO HEAL HIS BODY AND HE STAYED TRUE TO HIS FAITH TO THE END. HE WOULD PRAY WITH ME AND MY MOM ALSO THAT ALL OF OUR HURTING HEARTS COULD HEAL ALSO! I AM PRAYING FOR YOU AND YOUR FAMILY! BETSY

whplsh

Honey find the best hospital in your area that is not affiliated with the place you had him originaly, His health is most important.
Then get a good attorney to get rid of bad doctors!
I hope things work out. God bless

Daddysgirl05

ZELLARS said:

HI DAWN. WELL WHEN MY DAD WAS FIRST DIAGNOSED IN 2000 AND HAD SURGERY HE HAD PART OF HIS STOMACH REMOVED AND THEY SAID THEY HAD GOTTEN IT ALL AND IT WASN'T IN THE LYMPH NODES BUT IT WAS STAGED 2 BECAUSE SOME STRAY CELLS HAD GOTTEN ON THE OUTSIDE--HE HAD CHEMO AND RADIATION AFTERWARD AND DID FANTASTIC UNTIL IT CAME BACK 4 YRS LATER IN THE SAME EXACT SPOT. THEN HE HAD ALREADY HAD THE MAXIMUM AMOUNT OF RADIATION TO THAT AREA AND WITH CHEMO IT WOULD JUST BE TO KEEP HIM HERE LONGER. YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND THAT WE NEVER LET THE DRS. SAY GRIM NEWS AROUND HIM BUT ALSO THEY WEREN'T TELLING HIM THAT THERE WAS A WHOLE LOT THEY COULD DO. I DONT KNOW THE SPECIFICS OF YOUR DAD'S CASE AND I SOOO HOPE THAT YOU WON'T FIND THIS OFFENSIVE(THE ONLY REASON I AM TELLING YOU THIS IS BECAUSE I HAVE LIVED IT) YOU ARE SO RIGHT TO KEEP YOUR DAD'S SPIRITS UP--HOPE IS IMPORTANT AND NEVER FORGET THAT BUT SAYING "YOU HAVE TO BE AROUND FOR THE GRANDBABIES" ISNT GONG TO MAKE HIM FEEL BETTER--HE KNOWS THAT AND I KNOW THAT YOU SAY THAT TO ENCOURAGE HIM TO FIGHT--ITS JUST THAT THERE ARE THOSE WHO FIGHT THIS DREADED DISEASE WITH EVERYTHING THEY HAVE BUT ULTIMATELY IT IS IN GOD'S HANDS-HE HURTS ALSO TO SEE YOU HURTING AND THAT'S WHY IT IS IMPORTANT TO STAY STRONG AND SUPPORTIVE FOR HIM. I HOPE I HAVE MADE SOME SORT OF SENSE--ALSO PLEASE KNOW THAT YOU CAN ASK ME ANYTHING-AND I MEAN ANYTHING! IT HURTS SO MUCH. MY DAD WOULD PRAY THAT IF IT WS GOD'S WILL TO HEAL HIS BODY AND HE STAYED TRUE TO HIS FAITH TO THE END. HE WOULD PRAY WITH ME AND MY MOM ALSO THAT ALL OF OUR HURTING HEARTS COULD HEAL ALSO! I AM PRAYING FOR YOU AND YOUR FAMILY! BETSY

Thank you and yes your advice had made lots of sense.. Its great having people there that has been or that are in the same position that I am in and to have someone to ask questions and talk to. Thank you. My father is a stage 3 and had 19 lymth nodes removed and 17 had cancer in them.... He now still has a leak where his small intestine was sewed to his esopogus and has not even been able to start his chemo and radiation yet. I am sure we have a very long road ahead of us. He is just taking one day at a time.... And yes praying and hope is the most important thing right now. Thank you betsy.... -Dawn

Daddysgirl05

whplsh said:

Honey find the best hospital in your area that is not affiliated with the place you had him originaly, His health is most important.
Then get a good attorney to get rid of bad doctors!
I hope things work out. God bless

Thanks for the good advice and yes we have started the process already but they will not do anything with the case because it is cancer. ?????? Who would of Known???? I have been researching for the best place possible for him and he is stubborn and wants to stick to the nearby places... I want him to travel for the best care available out there... We are working on changing his mind!!! Thank you again.
Do you have any sugestions on the best places for care? -Dawn

ZELLARS

Daddysgirl05 said:

Thank you and yes your advice had made lots of sense.. Its great having people there that has been or that are in the same position that I am in and to have someone to ask questions and talk to. Thank you. My father is a stage 3 and had 19 lymth nodes removed and 17 had cancer in them.... He now still has a leak where his small intestine was sewed to his esopogus and has not even been able to start his chemo and radiation yet. I am sure we have a very long road ahead of us. He is just taking one day at a time.... And yes praying and hope is the most important thing right now. Thank you betsy.... -Dawn

DAWN I WANT YOU TO KNOW YOU CAN ASK ME ANYTHING-MY HEART ACHES FOR YOU BECAUSE THERE ARE SO MANY DIFFERENT EMOTIONS--ESPECIALLY RIGHT NOW BECAUSE ITS JUST ALL SO SHOCKING AND SEEMS SO UNFAIR. I THOUGHT WHY DO BAD PEOPLE LIVE AND DON'T GO THROUGH SUCH HURT. IT TOOK ME ALONG TIME TO REALIZE THAT GOD WASN'T PUNISHING US BUT THAT HE DOES HAVE A PLAN EVEN THOUGH RIGHT NOW IT SEEMS COMPLETELY OPPOSITE! ITS SO HARD WHEN YOUR EMOTIONS ARE TAKING OVER WHEN YOU HAVE LITTLE ONES TO TAKE CARE OF--I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN TOLD AND ALSO HAVE ALWAYS TOLD PEOPLE THAT THEY WOULD BE IN MY THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS--BUT UNTIL YOU CAN FEEL SOMEONE ELSE'S OR RELATE TO IT THEN THOSE PRAYERS ARE CONTINOUS!! KEEP THE FAITH AND KNOW THAT I AM HERE! BETSY

Daddysgirl05

ZELLARS said:

DAWN I WANT YOU TO KNOW YOU CAN ASK ME ANYTHING-MY HEART ACHES FOR YOU BECAUSE THERE ARE SO MANY DIFFERENT EMOTIONS--ESPECIALLY RIGHT NOW BECAUSE ITS JUST ALL SO SHOCKING AND SEEMS SO UNFAIR. I THOUGHT WHY DO BAD PEOPLE LIVE AND DON'T GO THROUGH SUCH HURT. IT TOOK ME ALONG TIME TO REALIZE THAT GOD WASN'T PUNISHING US BUT THAT HE DOES HAVE A PLAN EVEN THOUGH RIGHT NOW IT SEEMS COMPLETELY OPPOSITE! ITS SO HARD WHEN YOUR EMOTIONS ARE TAKING OVER WHEN YOU HAVE LITTLE ONES TO TAKE CARE OF--I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN TOLD AND ALSO HAVE ALWAYS TOLD PEOPLE THAT THEY WOULD BE IN MY THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS--BUT UNTIL YOU CAN FEEL SOMEONE ELSE'S OR RELATE TO IT THEN THOSE PRAYERS ARE CONTINOUS!! KEEP THE FAITH AND KNOW THAT I AM HERE! BETSY

HI betsy... Thanks for being so supportive... And yes it is so true what you said: "I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN TOLD AND ALSO HAVE ALWAYS TOLD PEOPLE THAT THEY WOULD BE IN MY THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS--BUT UNTIL YOU CAN FEEL SOMEONE ELSE'S OR RELATE TO IT THEN THOSE PRAYERS ARE CONTINOUS!! " That is sooo true when you actually live a stressful heart breaking part of life is when you actually sit back and see what millions of people go through in there hard times in life and it makes you feel even more for them then you would have... You see this is really the first hard thing that has hit soooo close to home for me even thogh I have seen friends and family live their own heart breaking times in their lives..... And yes right now is when I am saying why him and us, he has done so much good in his life so why him but yes there is a plan somewhere out there.... Thanks again for being here!!! -Dawn

charles7472

Daddysgirl05 said:

Thanks for the good advice and yes we have started the process already but they will not do anything with the case because it is cancer. ?????? Who would of Known???? I have been researching for the best place possible for him and he is stubborn and wants to stick to the nearby places... I want him to travel for the best care available out there... We are working on changing his mind!!! Thank you again.
Do you have any sugestions on the best places for care? -Dawn

Hi Dawn,
I am sorry that I did not see your message sooner. I had stage 3 stomach cancer 2 years ago and had most of my stomach removed....so far the cat scans have been clean....my operation and follow up is at Sloan-Kettering in New York City...The best cancer centers in the US are Sloan and MD Anderson in Houston, Texas...This is all they do is cancer treatment....Please try to get him to one of these places...you can contact me at ccassar@parkell.com if you would like to discuss the treatment I had at sloan...I will include him in my prayers.....

Charles

mullygator

My mother had her stomach removed in March of '06.
I would love to hear any advice you or your family might have about life post-gastrectomy.

Many thanks!!!
mullygator