Brain Mets?

Btrcup

Hi all, got a question. Brief history, hubby dx Feb 2004 Stage IV, mets to greater omentum & 13/21 lymph nodes. Completed 6 mos. chemo (5FU, Avastin, Oxiliaplatin & Leukovorin). In Dec 2004, found out had mets to abdominal cavity. Is taking alternative route instead of chemo this time.

Lately, he has been very forgetful, which is so out of character for him. A couple of weeks ago he left his car door open all night (on the new sports car!!) and last week he left the trunk open. He has been so moody also. He snaps at everyone! I can tolerate it, but our kids (8 & 4) always end up running to their rooms in tears. Then he feels bad and he starts to cry! Yesterday, our son made him First Holy Communion and we had all the grandparents down. He would put things down and two minutes later couldn't find them. Then last night his stomach looked bloated. When I felt it, it was very hard (could this be ascites?).

I'm very worried and I know he is too. We don't know what to expect or what's going to happen next. We have an appt with his oncologist tomorrow and I plan to discuss this with him. Sometimes Scott get's embarrassed about things he does and says, so he may not want to mention these things to his doc. That's why I need to go to his appts with him, to be the naggy wife!

If anyone has experienced any of this, or has any input, would appreciate it! Thanks and prayers!

Linda (Baltimore)

themis01

Linda,
He may just be more forgetful or moddy because he is preoccupied with worry. I know since my mom's diagnosis it has been harder to be patient with my own kids some days. I think it is normal to be forgetful when your mind is somewhere else. (like worrying about cancer). Linda I am close to you in Alexandria VA.
Erika

CAMaura

Dear Linda,

I have NO experience....but I just wanted to offer some support. Wow.....the both of you - and your children - are going through so much. My thoughts are certainly with you.

Hoping for the best for your husband tomorrow. Praying that the appointment goes well.

All the best,
Maura

scouty

Hi Linda,

I sent you an email. Don't worry too much about brain mets. Oxiliplatin is really wicked on the ole brain and after 6 months of it and now being on alternative stuff, it could just be that. Check your CSN email.

Lisa P.

johnom

Dear Btrcup,
I agree with everyone else, I really doubt it's something to worry about. I remember reading somewhere about "chemo brain",which is simple forgetfulness, caused either by the chemo or else the enormous strain of battling this disease. No one could possibly blame either of you and no one here will if you find your moods are testier than usual. It's been the toughest year of your lives with more to come.
I doubt this is something new to really have to face. I haven't had chemo for 6 months and I left my key in the ignition in the "on" position last week while I listened to the radio a minute. I left it that way all night and it fatally damaged my battery. I've never done that before. I am preoccupied with my upcoming PET scan on the one year anniversary of my surgery.

I know you two are tough enough for this. Hang in there.

John

rejoyous

I agree. Don't borrow trouble by imagining brain mets! Of course I don't know for sure, but I bet anything that all of your husband's strange behavior is because of stress.

I'm doing "well" by anyone's measure--I finished my chemo in February and I had an all-clear C-T scan in March. But still, I find it a full time job to stay positive and stay focused on the day to day business of closing the car door, etc. And I don't mean that I'm even successful at that!

I had a major fight with both my husband and my 13 year old daughter Saturday morning over absolutely "nothing"--you know, major issues like whose responsibility it was to buy the milk, who was going to pick her up from a church function. They were both devastated. I could tell that they were trying to reassure themselves that it was just Mom being stressed, but I could also tell it was hard on them.

This business is stressful! All any of us can do is just keep trying to get through one day at a time as gracefully and positively as possible. Tell your friends it's their job to be your support system. You'll need it.

And of course we're here for you, too.

Kanort

Hi Linda,

I think you have gotten your question answered so well in the previous posts so I'll just add that I'm thinking of you both. I know that this is a challenge for all of you. I hope that your appointment with the oncologist has answered your questions.

We are here for you.

Hugs,

Kay