Need Info on Stage 3 bladder cancer

latishac24

My father-in-law was just diagnosed with stage 3 possible 4 bladder cancer. He is supposed to see a cancer specialist Feb. 4th. What advice can you give us to deal with the news of his diagnosis and what kind of questions should we ask at our visit? I can honostly say that this is one of the hardest things in my life that I have had to deal with. I am close to me husband's family. My father-in-law is only 42 and he is very depressed. They have started him on anti-depressants though. We know they will have to take his bladder since it has invaded the muscle. But since we are new at all this we want to be prepared going to see this specialist. Any feed back and prayers is greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance.

DoubleKnot

My husband had Invasive Cancer that also went into the muscle of the bladder. He had his bladder/prostrate and 5 lymphnodes removed because of the cancer. He had a Radical Cystectomy w/Ileo Conduit. Ask the doctor about it and GET ALL OF THE INFO. POSSIBLE AHEAD OF TIME. What it amounts to, is they make a thing called a "Stoma" and the urine comes out of it and into a collection bag. A "flange" is secured to the body and around that flange, then a urine collection bag is attached to it. This is what is VERY IMPORTANT, have a "Stoma Expert" to show you exactly which Flange, Urine Bag, Tape to secure the Flange, and an Ostomy Belt to make sure that the Flange and Bag stay secured to the body. If you do not have an expert to show you and to help you do this with on hands experience, the patient will have trouble with the urine leaking EVERYWHERE and ALL OF THE TIME. If you need precise info. concerning the tape and belts, please write to me. Have Home Health Care Nurses to come into your home and to help you all with it the first month. Again, the most important thing is insisting on THE STOMA EXPERT to help you to find the EXACT FLANGE & BAG FOR HIM, plus the Stoma/Ostomy Belt. You will need to buy 3 of the belts, and I also suggest that you clear all of this with your insurance company. Most pharmacies want CASH UP FRONT on Ostomy Supplies, then you have to wait for reimbursement. Liberty Medical is the only place that you can order the supplies without money UPFRONT. I will keep checking to see if I can help you in anyway. My prayers are with all of you. You don't have an easy road ahead of you. It was July of 2004 that my husband had his surgery, and the first month was the roughest. Good luck.

Sincerely,
Lin

DoubleKnot

Hello latishac24,

Concerning your father-in-laws bladder cancer, if you will read my other post under the subject Metastasized Bladder Cancer to the Lungs, you will see that I posted more info. that might be of help to you. I have listed the Ostomy supplies that my husband uses, plus some other important tips. These are the BEST PRODUCTS for Ostomy use. I hope that it will help you. The best of luck to you all.

Sincerely,
DoubleKnot

latishac24

Thank you all for the great info you provided. It really helps. We are going with my father-in-law friday February 4th to see the specialist and we will find out then if he will be a candidate for the neobladder or the the bag. We look forward to getting the process started because the faster we get it started the faster he gets on the road to recovery. Thank you all again and my prayers are with you too.
Sincerely,
latishac24

paulf

latishac24 said:

Thank you all for the great info you provided. It really helps. We are going with my father-in-law friday February 4th to see the specialist and we will find out then if he will be a candidate for the neobladder or the the bag. We look forward to getting the process started because the faster we get it started the faster he gets on the road to recovery. Thank you all again and my prayers are with you too.
Sincerely,
latishac24

First of all, you probably need to talk to people who've had both neobladder and internal or external bags. google it all and find a specialists in your area at a urologist/oncologist at a major medical/cancer/teaching hospital. Go to http://www.blcwebcafe.org for lots of information about bladder cancer and treatment options. If you're interested in being in touch with people who've had those surgeries, let me know and I can provide their names. They will be very helpful. I thought that I was going to need surgery and did a lot of research and was in touch with folks who have been there. it was a tremendous help emotionally to have information and viable options. good for your father-in-law in getting some medical help for the depression. i did too. it can be debiliating and as bad as the cancer. please be in touch with me and let me know he does. also, don't hesitate to ask any questions. i know a cancer survivor who really knows the questions to ask your doctor, so let me know if you need more help in formulating your questions. i know that you don't have much time before your appointment but i'll check back here a few times a day. good luck

paul

Military

I had my bladder removed in July of this past year. It also resulted in the removal of my prostrate. One of the best in this filed is Dr. David Skinner at USC. He is the Head of Urology. While the operation is not simple it is not that bad. This Doctor perfected the process of bulding a new bladder from your lower intestine. His process allows you to urinate just as in the past. Most men are concerned since almost all doctors will recomend removal of the prostrate. Sine your father in law is relatively young he can have a penile pump implant at the same time as the operation. You can enjoy relations just as in the past including a climax without semen. I hope I am not giving you more info than you would like however, most men share the same concern. First,lets get ride of the cancer and worry about other things later. I have fully recovered, can ride my Harley and play golf. I am 62, retired but am grateful that I had one of the best in this filed attending to my needs. The staff at USC are excellent and very attentive. I have had Dr. Skinner's office help others by telling them of doctors in their neck of the woods who studied under the USC program. Feel free to contact me.