To: Edina77

Unknown

Hello Edina. My name is Monika and I am, like you, a care giver to my husband Bert, a current no evidence of disease stage III colon cancer survivor and also to my wonderful, wonderful mother, advanced non-operable lung cancer or "beast of beasts" as I call it.

I know your pain, your fear, your sorrow all to well as I faced it myself two years ago when my mom first diagnosed and again last July 2003 when hubby was diagnosed. All I can tell you is, and as hard as it may seem, don't throw in the towel. Not ever!!!! The only person who can make that choice is your mom but with good care and all the advanced treatments that are available now plus support from a wonderful daughter like you, there's no reason why she can't enjoy many more years of quality life and perhaps even beat this ****.

As I said, my mom's odds for being here today were dreadful...but thanks to her strong spirit, positive attitude, good medical care, and the grace of God, although by no means cured, she is holding her own and plans on going to Europe for five weeks October 26!!!! At diagnosis time, I didn't even think I'd have her today....shows you how much I know.

My husband, on the other hand, has responded real well to chemo and fortunately, at time of diagnosis was operable and remains no evidence of disease almost a year and half later. That's another one that I thought I had lost (as people on this board who have known me for awhile will attest to when I first joined the group).

Please remember that cancer is no longer an automatic death sentence and while it still takes far to many lives, there are more and more survivors every single day. Focus on that and whenever you feel yourself falling into the pitt of anxiety, worry, and fear...come and vent here. Your mom needs you...believe me she does and what she needs is optimism and encouragement. She is lucky to have you and yes, as a daughter of a wonderful mother too, we are lucky, oh so lucky, to have them.

Hugs,
Monika

Edina77

Hello Monika
First let me say thank you for positive words. It is great to hear your mom is still with us, and from what i hear she will beat this 'beast' all the way!!!!
And your husband too, wonderful news.
I talk to my mom few times a day and today she told me she gained one pound!!!! I was so happy to hear that!!!! That is good news to me, hey - one pound more is better then one pound less like it was every morning at the hospital after the surgery....
We ran into some 'problems' with getting her appointment with the oncologist. She still does not have one but will have it by the end of next week. She got worried there for a second which showed me that she really cared and wanted to fight- another positive step. So, things are looking up slowly but surely. And once i am with her too, i believe her spirits will pick up even more.
I know that cancer is by no means what it was many years ago... I truly believe that she can beat this. Yet , there is that cloud of fear right above my head, all the time just sitting there waiting to start pouring.... But i won't let it. The road ahead is so so so long that every time i start to think negative- i stop myself and say :"not today, leave it for some other day ahead" and that is how i push it day to day.Now i am getting ready to fight so hard- like never before in my life. Nothing in my life so far has been as important to me as to help my mom get well again. SO i am gathering info, reading and reading everything i can and writing down questions i want to ask her doc. Bring it on, i say!!! We can do it!!!!

Thank you all for your wonderful words. I pray for all of you every day and you are in my thoughts. Without you all this would be God knows so much harder for me. I will keep you updated.

Love

Edina.

kangatoo

Edina77 said:

Hello Monika
First let me say thank you for positive words. It is great to hear your mom is still with us, and from what i hear she will beat this 'beast' all the way!!!!
And your husband too, wonderful news.
I talk to my mom few times a day and today she told me she gained one pound!!!! I was so happy to hear that!!!! That is good news to me, hey - one pound more is better then one pound less like it was every morning at the hospital after the surgery....
We ran into some 'problems' with getting her appointment with the oncologist. She still does not have one but will have it by the end of next week. She got worried there for a second which showed me that she really cared and wanted to fight- another positive step. So, things are looking up slowly but surely. And once i am with her too, i believe her spirits will pick up even more.
I know that cancer is by no means what it was many years ago... I truly believe that she can beat this. Yet , there is that cloud of fear right above my head, all the time just sitting there waiting to start pouring.... But i won't let it. The road ahead is so so so long that every time i start to think negative- i stop myself and say :"not today, leave it for some other day ahead" and that is how i push it day to day.Now i am getting ready to fight so hard- like never before in my life. Nothing in my life so far has been as important to me as to help my mom get well again. SO i am gathering info, reading and reading everything i can and writing down questions i want to ask her doc. Bring it on, i say!!! We can do it!!!!

Thank you all for your wonderful words. I pray for all of you every day and you are in my thoughts. Without you all this would be God knows so much harder for me. I will keep you updated.

Love

Edina.

Hiya Edina--welcome to our group of friends. I apologise for not replying to your recent post--'ol kanga goes walkabout ocassionally n misses a few days-but I read all the posts.I am a stage 2 survivor(8 months). I am sad that your mum's ilness has brought you here -but hey, what a wonderfull place to be! Judging from all the responses you have received Edina---you and your mum will not be alone in this fight--none of us are!!!!As a carer you join the "angel" brigade sweetie, without angels we would find it very hard to endure all the treatments.
It is customary for kanga to send our new friends a "rainbow". At the end of this rainbow you will find the one thing very important to all of us and it ain't gold!
Look for the one thing that keeps us all "family" Edina ---LOVE!!!
Be strong and be positive--licking tha beast is doable.
Our luv n huggs from OZ, kanga n Jen