Is this Normal?
Comments
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I think that you are doing great and dont worry about how you are dealing with this too much. Everybody is different and you may have already dealt with some of your grief while your mum was ill. It is obvious that you were very close and even though she is physically gone you must feel that she is still with you which is a good thing. It has only been a month or so and you have probably been so busy organising things and catching up in general that you haven't really had time to stop and think too much. I haven't lost anyone to cancer but my advice would be to either just go on as you are or if you are worried about having a breakdown at a later stage - maybe go and see a counsellor and discuss how you feel. Your mum was so blessed to have such a great family to take care of her.0
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Thanks for the response RebeccaJane. I'm doing much better now. I'm going to school to become a Medical Assistant and then it's off to Nursing school. I feel like I'm doing what my mom would have wanted me to do. That is to go to school, get an education and take care of my family. Even though I miss her a lot, and she isn't here on earth, I know she will never be forgotten, I will make sure of it.RebeccaJane said:I think that you are doing great and dont worry about how you are dealing with this too much. Everybody is different and you may have already dealt with some of your grief while your mum was ill. It is obvious that you were very close and even though she is physically gone you must feel that she is still with you which is a good thing. It has only been a month or so and you have probably been so busy organising things and catching up in general that you haven't really had time to stop and think too much. I haven't lost anyone to cancer but my advice would be to either just go on as you are or if you are worried about having a breakdown at a later stage - maybe go and see a counsellor and discuss how you feel. Your mum was so blessed to have such a great family to take care of her.
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Hi, Sorry to not respond earlier; I haven't been to this board in a while. It sounds like you are feeling a bit better as time goes on, which is what happens after we lose someone close.
I work in dementia care, and I know that many families feel they have said a "long goodbye", and when death takes their loved one, it's no longer the person they really knew, but still loved.
It's great to hear that you are getting on with your life and education, and, as a nurse also, I thing your plans are great. Been a nurse for over 30 years, and still love most parts of it!
Take care, Judy0 -
Hello meganucci,
I experienced the same thing that you did when your Mom died. My Mom and I were and will always be, very close because we were and are bonded by our hearts. We were both Mother and Daughter, and the best of friends.
When the Hospice lady told us that it would be 3 days at the most before Mom would be gone, I actually smiled while the other family members looked sad or cried. I knew that is what Mom wanted and had wanted for a very long time, so when I smiled, I was happy that Mom's wish was going to be granted. I didn't shed a tear after Mom died, while the other family members had trouble dealing with her death. Mom and I had discussed her dying many times, and she said "Honey, we know that it is going to happen eventually, so when it does don't be sad. You know that is what I want so very much." When she was dying, Mom looked me straight in the eyes and said "Honey, there are such things as Guardian Angels and I am going to be YOUR Guardian Angel". It sounds like that you and your Mom had a very special bond also, so I am sure that you too have a very special Guardian Angel Your Mom. Mom had prepared me for her death, even though she told me that "she didn't want to leave me". She is in my heart and in my mind always. No,don't consider your reaction abnormal at all. I understand it very well, because I also reacted in the same way. We are our Mother's daughters and we will always be just that, and it is sealed with love.
DoubleKnot0
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