Bad day today

Mosis50 Member Posts: 59
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
Hello all,
I am awaiting a mastecotomy in another week. I have waited over a month for this due to problems scheduling. I have met with an oncologist and will start chemo about a month after surgery. I have ordered a wig and a prosthesis. I don't know what else to do. But heres the problem. I have these bouts of crying. They come in waves. Today I was at church and had to leave because I couldn't quit crying. I have such caring people around but they just don't know what to do with me when I get like this. Of course I don't know what to do either. I am a strong woman and have a very strong faith in God and His purpose. I try to stay busy making arrangements for my life and I read constantly trying to learn all I can. I am NOT hormone receptive, neither estrogen or progesterone, also HER2 neg. I am not sure what that means and I have not been able to find much about these. My oncologist suggested that being negative meant he would be using a different than normal campaign. He also told me to stop taking my hormone replacement. I wonder about that since I am negative to hormones. Oh well, I did it anyway. I am rambling because I am in such a depression today. It isn't because I have lost faith. Just that I am having a downer of a day today. Please pray for me!!!


  • ksfc
    ksfc Member Posts: 251
    I'm so sorry you're having such a bad day! Those waves of crying are perfectly normal in your situation. It's overwhelming and difficult to adjust to the idea that your whole life is changing. Also, all the info at the beginning can really overwhelm you. Just take one day or minute at a time, and don't be afraid to ask for help. Also, many who have undergone treatment for cancer, including myself, have taken anti-depressants to help with the anxiety and depression. Even with wonderful support, there are times when you feel all alone, and that's what we're all here for. Take care! Diane
  • banker
    banker Member Posts: 317 Member
    Hi Moses50, sorry you are having such a bad day. I am sure we all do at times. My BC was estrogen receptor negative also, can't find to much information on it, but the website "GOOGLE" is very helpful and userfriendly. I had a mastectomy, started chemo 7 weeks after I was pretty well healed, had a mediport put in. If you wish to talk or have specific question, you can reach me at my regular e-mail
    [email protected]
    I will try to help you as much as I can. Mention to your doctor the crying spells, your thoughts and feelings , I am sure he will give you some medication, mine did and it has helped a lot. I work during the day, but feel free to e-mail me if you like and I will get in touch with you as soon as I get home.
    (((hugs)))) emmi
  • sassysally
    sassysally Member Posts: 150
    Sweetie, Have have been through what you're going through 3 times. Its ok to cry. Until your system get used to the tamoxifin, you will be moody. Cancer is a big diagnosis, and is a shock. We as humans feel immortal, and the big "C" puts into perspective just how much we are not. Its scarey. Your faith will help you alot. Let your friends do what they can for you. When you start chemo, you will get tired. If they offer to cook, hey let them. Just sit and talk with them. Laugh, cry, scream...its ok. Everyone has downer days. I've been dealing with for 13 yrs now, and believe me after that long, I've at least had a collective year of downer days. You have to remember that you are still here, and you are a fighter. That really in the scope of things there are people worse off than you. Cancer is not for the weak, it is for the Survivors. You are definately a survivor. Yes, its tough, and it is no picnic, but you are tougher, you are one of us.....SURVIVOR!!!!!!!!!Im here if you need anything. Hang in there. All works out the way it should.
  • isaiah4031
    isaiah4031 Member Posts: 240
    Dear Mosis50, Emotional ups and down come with the diagnosis. There is nothing wrong with that and it doesn't mean that you've lost faith. Remember how Moses had to hold his arms up so that the Israelites could cross the sea? When he got tired, Joshua and Aaron held his arms up for him. When we are heavy laden, it is our loved ones who "hold up our arms" for us. Be it through prayer, doing odds and ends for us, listening to us, or whatever. This site is wonderful for sharing your heart's feelings. We are "hear" for you! I'll be praying for you too.