Dad newly diagnosed

bygrace

My dad was just diagnosed with lung cancer a couple weeks ago. He had been in and out of the hospital for 2 months with pneumonia's and the cancer didn't show up on the lung x'ray because it was hiding behing his heart. A final cat scan showed it. He is meeting with a surgeon tomorow to see if it is operable. He is 76 and not in good health.. so either way (surgery or chemo/radiation) we are in for a tough road. The good news is that he has recently rededicated his life to the Lord and I know he has eternal life in heavan. Still I miss him terribly. He was visiting me in California for Christmas when he got sick and all this happened. He just left to go back to tennesee where he lives.. so we have this distance. My mom died from lung cancer in 1979, she was only 52. Anyway I am looking for some support friends to go thru this with me. I consider myself blessed to have had the last two months with my dad visiting me here... but now starts the hard part. Wondering when to go visit him... make the best of the time left ect. Thanks for all your encouragement. There are brave, wonderful people on these boards. Terri

bjb

I'm so sorry about your Dad. I've had two grandfathers and one grandmother die of lung cancer, and now my dad has cancer. I had to hold him last week while he was having a seizure due to the pain and medications he is on. I had to try and hold him steady while he wet his pants and convulsed, with my mother watching and crying and trying to call 911, which took forever. I'm scared, and I'm angry. I've recently become an attorney and I'm trying to get my bosses to go after the tobacco companies that sold him death for 40 years. He's 74 years old and I'm afraid he isn't going to make it through this. Do I sound like a ranting lunatic? I'm sorry if I do. I'm also in CA. My dad's in a hospital in Santa Monica which is only 10 minutes away, so I can visit often. Good luck to you and your family, email me anytime you need to talk to someone. I'll do the same.

hallalex

As I was reading your message, I felt like I was reading my own story. I just found out that my dad has Small Cell Lung Cancer(SCLC). He was diagnosed in November. I also live in California and my dad lives in Washington state. When you said that you were'nt sure when to go visit him I felt like you were reading my mind. My dad is 69 years old and lives alone. He has a close friend that can help him when he can, but other than that it's just me. Last Friday his friend stopped by to see him and later told me that he had lost 45 pounds and looked like he hadn't showered in 2 weeks. He was put in the hospital and given his first chemo treatment. The doctor told him that if he didn't start his treatment ASAP he may only have a couple of weeks to live and even with treatment he gave him 10 months. I'm planning to go up to see him in a couple of weeks. My biggest concern is how can I help him long distance. I'm not sure if I need to consider staying up there to help him. It really helps when you have someone to talk to. E-mail me if you just need to share how you're feeling. Laurie

nonigirl

: HI there, I felt I had to respond to this..I am so sorry to hear about your dad, but I may be able to help...I heard about a fruit juice called Tahitian Noni Juice about 7 months ago...I went to www.incc.org and read all of the testimonies about people who were diagnosed with different types of cancer, some even given 2-3 weeks to live and started drinking this all natural fruit juice in large amounts and the cell count was back to normal..I know this may sound too good to be true, because I said the same thing, until they found some cancerous cells in my mother's breast and I got the juice and gave it to her...when it was time for her to get another checkup, all of her cells were fine and the Dr. could not find a trace of cancer in her body. The only thing she did different was drink the juice....I became a distributor of the juice that day and have made it a personal mission of mine to let people know that this "God's gift in a bottle" really does work..For anyone that would like more information, please go to www.incc.org. This is a site that medical doctors put together and discussed their research on how this noni fruit helps cancer patients. You can also go to nonitestimonials.com and hear live testimonies for yourself and you can get some reading material from www.nonitools.com. My name is Kristi and I would like to help everyone I can and let this know about this product. You are all in my prayers and God bless...If you would like to speak with me personally, or to try the juice, please contact me at ANYTIME at 678-358-3358.

grayg

Hi Terri, My dad was also just recently diagnosed with lung cancer, call mesothelioma, caused by asbestos. My father is 73 years old.He is in a lot of pain. Its almost been a year when his first catscan(spelling)was taken. They miss his small spot on his lung. He went this past January and had another one done. This one showed his whole left lung blacked. He just had a biopsy done this past monday and it was confirm it was cancer and it is agressive. I live 3000 miles away from my dad. I am planning on going home in April with my whole family. It has been very hard for me being away from my dad.I also live in California. I want to go back sooner, but I don't want my father to panic that he is very ill. I am not given up yet.I pray everyday that my dad will find Jesus in his heart.Hang in there Terri.I have sent away for vitamins and mineral for my dad to take so he can get his strength back.I let you know how they work. Take care, Gima

Emma37

Hello out there. I am new to this also. My Dad has just been diagnosed with lung cancer. I'm really kinda lost at the moment. I'm so confused. I have so many questions. But first, a thought. I am so appalled at the response from people when I tell them my father has cancer or when I ask for prayer. The first thing out of thire mouths is "does he smoke?" The answer, if you're wondering, is yes. But, my concern is where is people's compassion? Even God's people seem to be more condesending than the world. I thought it was the other way around. He has smoked for over 50 years but he's still dying. He's still a person, a father, and a wonderful human being. People act as if this is what he deserves. Maybe it is, I don't know, but he is still one of God's children and still suffering. You don't tell the mother a child who has run out in trafiic and been hit, "oh, well, they shouldn't have darted out." You don't tell someone with AIDs, "Oh well, if you weren't a homesexual or a drug attic you wouldn't have AIDs." AIDs has more than one cause. No matter the cause, people still need, and want compassion and prayer. Not to mention that all these idiotic things are being said to the caregivers. I DON'T care why my Dad has cancer. I just know he has it and I love him regardless of what he's done in his life. Sorry to go off on everyone. Like I said, I'm new to this and was just wondering if anyone else has gone through similar reactions when you tell someone that your loved one has cancer and if so, how do you respond and deal with it? My Dad is saved and I know he'll be with the Lord, because Jesus forgives and is not condescending as many of his people are. Thanks for listening to my rambling. Emma

TheRising

Emma37 said:

Hello out there. I am new to this also. My Dad has just been diagnosed with lung cancer. I'm really kinda lost at the moment. I'm so confused. I have so many questions. But first, a thought. I am so appalled at the response from people when I tell them my father has cancer or when I ask for prayer. The first thing out of thire mouths is "does he smoke?" The answer, if you're wondering, is yes. But, my concern is where is people's compassion? Even God's people seem to be more condesending than the world. I thought it was the other way around. He has smoked for over 50 years but he's still dying. He's still a person, a father, and a wonderful human being. People act as if this is what he deserves. Maybe it is, I don't know, but he is still one of God's children and still suffering. You don't tell the mother a child who has run out in trafiic and been hit, "oh, well, they shouldn't have darted out." You don't tell someone with AIDs, "Oh well, if you weren't a homesexual or a drug attic you wouldn't have AIDs." AIDs has more than one cause. No matter the cause, people still need, and want compassion and prayer. Not to mention that all these idiotic things are being said to the caregivers. I DON'T care why my Dad has cancer. I just know he has it and I love him regardless of what he's done in his life. Sorry to go off on everyone. Like I said, I'm new to this and was just wondering if anyone else has gone through similar reactions when you tell someone that your loved one has cancer and if so, how do you respond and deal with it? My Dad is saved and I know he'll be with the Lord, because Jesus forgives and is not condescending as many of his people are. Thanks for listening to my rambling. Emma

Hi all and blessings! I want to help, support, share and never forget to laugh. I am NEW here and do not even know HOW to find the current pages etc. I AM a Ling Cancer survivor. Actualy a cured one and it was very advanced so not coming from a place of "not knowing." And have learned that LIFE is a dag gone struggle aside from the dumb tumors. I was NOT operable,. It was HUGE and non-small cell. Stage III a-b. I can help. And get support for myself for the 1st time too. My srory is an ODD one and long one so have to post it later. How thay found it was a HUGE weird chain of events BUT divine intervention. All cause of a fall from some lost car keys. As for thoses jerks who lack compassion....even before I got sick, I was always a empathetic and compassionate spirit. Came out of the womb that way. SO DO NOT LISTEN TO ANYONE who blames the patient cause of cigarettes! It is PAINFULLY clear that now in our culture, people are sinning every day against each other and te earth. Let those who have no sin upon their soul cast the 1st stone! I just realized I sound like a TV preaching, bible banger. I am not. A granola gal actually. With much awareness. So the next time the lovely soul is hurting because her dad is sick and people are lacking heart.....ask THEM how many gallons it takes to fill up that enormous SUV!!!

bygrace

Emma37 said:

Hello out there. I am new to this also. My Dad has just been diagnosed with lung cancer. I'm really kinda lost at the moment. I'm so confused. I have so many questions. But first, a thought. I am so appalled at the response from people when I tell them my father has cancer or when I ask for prayer. The first thing out of thire mouths is "does he smoke?" The answer, if you're wondering, is yes. But, my concern is where is people's compassion? Even God's people seem to be more condesending than the world. I thought it was the other way around. He has smoked for over 50 years but he's still dying. He's still a person, a father, and a wonderful human being. People act as if this is what he deserves. Maybe it is, I don't know, but he is still one of God's children and still suffering. You don't tell the mother a child who has run out in trafiic and been hit, "oh, well, they shouldn't have darted out." You don't tell someone with AIDs, "Oh well, if you weren't a homesexual or a drug attic you wouldn't have AIDs." AIDs has more than one cause. No matter the cause, people still need, and want compassion and prayer. Not to mention that all these idiotic things are being said to the caregivers. I DON'T care why my Dad has cancer. I just know he has it and I love him regardless of what he's done in his life. Sorry to go off on everyone. Like I said, I'm new to this and was just wondering if anyone else has gone through similar reactions when you tell someone that your loved one has cancer and if so, how do you respond and deal with it? My Dad is saved and I know he'll be with the Lord, because Jesus forgives and is not condescending as many of his people are. Thanks for listening to my rambling. Emma

Emma, I sent a message to your private mailbox too, as I did to the messages before this. Some people don't retrieve their messages to I'll answer like this too... Please post these thoughts as a "new message" as you have written alot of truths that people that come here can relate to. You are absolutely right. God bless you and your father. Terri

Karmina

Emma37 said:

Hello out there. I am new to this also. My Dad has just been diagnosed with lung cancer. I'm really kinda lost at the moment. I'm so confused. I have so many questions. But first, a thought. I am so appalled at the response from people when I tell them my father has cancer or when I ask for prayer. The first thing out of thire mouths is "does he smoke?" The answer, if you're wondering, is yes. But, my concern is where is people's compassion? Even God's people seem to be more condesending than the world. I thought it was the other way around. He has smoked for over 50 years but he's still dying. He's still a person, a father, and a wonderful human being. People act as if this is what he deserves. Maybe it is, I don't know, but he is still one of God's children and still suffering. You don't tell the mother a child who has run out in trafiic and been hit, "oh, well, they shouldn't have darted out." You don't tell someone with AIDs, "Oh well, if you weren't a homesexual or a drug attic you wouldn't have AIDs." AIDs has more than one cause. No matter the cause, people still need, and want compassion and prayer. Not to mention that all these idiotic things are being said to the caregivers. I DON'T care why my Dad has cancer. I just know he has it and I love him regardless of what he's done in his life. Sorry to go off on everyone. Like I said, I'm new to this and was just wondering if anyone else has gone through similar reactions when you tell someone that your loved one has cancer and if so, how do you respond and deal with it? My Dad is saved and I know he'll be with the Lord, because Jesus forgives and is not condescending as many of his people are. Thanks for listening to my rambling. Emma

Hi Emma37,

My dad was diagnosed on Feb 12, 04 with mesothelioma. He died on March 26, 04 and we just had the funeral and burrial on April 3, 04, the day before his 78th birthday. My dad smoked for 20 years and quit 35 years ago. I know that this may have contributed to him having cancer, but it does not mean I love him any less or make him a lesser person.

Stay strong, people who do not have compassion for you are not worth the effort of being troubled over. You having concern for your dad shows that you are a beautiful person. Your prayers for you dad is what is important. If I could give you a hug I would. There are some compassionate people out there, just not as many as we would like to be in this world.

My dad was stage 4 and surgery or chemo was not an option. I am blessed that I live across the street from my parents and was able to go down there every day after work to take care of him. My brother and I were at his bedside when he took his last breath. My mom was there also.

What I feel is most important is letting your dad know who much you care about him and let him know you are there for him through the good days and the bad days, it will help him a lot.

I would like to extend to you my email address, Karmina83@aol.com, you can write me, I usually check my email on the weekends, I don't have time during the week, but I am here for you.

Sincerely,

Karmina