Taxol again

bdean

Hi everyone!
So far 2002 has been a real bummer for me and my family - it just seems we haven't had anything but sad news. Don't get me wrong, I still feel truly blessed by God, and will continue to follow His lead. It just seems a whole lot has happened in such a short time.
The latest is that I found another lump which is malignant, and was put back on Taxol this past Tuesday. I am already having the side effects and can't believe how much I have forgotten in the last 16 months since my last dose. Kinda like having a baby - your brain tries to forget the pain!
You already know I am about to ask for an extra prayer or two. I couldn't have done this well for this long without the prayers of God fearing people like you. This support group really sends out positive vibes that can truly be felt. I don't ask for prayers without sending them right back to all of you in return.
I haven't been as active on this site in the last few months because of my parents' health, and then the death of my Mother. No matter how old you are it is comforting to have a Mother's concern and love for you; and I am really missing her. She passed right before Rosa, and I got the sweetest sympathy note from her that I will always treasure, because Rosa was so close to her own end when she took her precious time and wrote to me. I'm trying really hard not to have any more pity parties for myself - but my shoulders seem to be drooping a bit low in spite of my best intentions. So,if you can send an encouraging word or a silent little prayer on my behalf - it will be deeply appreciated.
I love all of you like true friends and I appreciate all you have already done for me. Our combined prayers can truly bring peace to our troubled hearts. Special thanks to Jean for all your support and help in reseaching all my problems! God love you all.
With many hugs,
Brenda

24242

Dearest Brenda,
You are always close to our hearts and on our minds. We are grateful you take the time to let us know how you are doing. I am sorry that the year has been so difficult and so much to cope with. Remember your mother will always be with you cheering you on every step of the way just as we will be doing. Remember that we are hardest on our selves and we only want you to be gentle with yourself. Your love flows over with your words and we are with you all the way.
I am sorry you have had so much pain and sorry for the loss of your mother. I want yo to know that we also appreciate you and all your strenght and courage you allow us to see.
My HUG to you,
Love,
Tara

cruf

Hi Brenda! So glad to hear from you. I was worried! I'm so sorry you're having so many problems and now this new Dx. You're a strong lady and will survive this new challenge! Just remember we're all here for you and will help with whatever we can! Feel free to e-mail me at any time here or at RPT1206@aol.com. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Take care! Keep us posted! HUGS!! Cathy

maud

Hi Brenda,
You know that my thoughts and prayers are with you always.I pray that the good Lord will give you comfort and peace as you go through this difficult time again.I am so sorry that you have to go through this again.
I know you miss your Mom alot,my heart aches for you, take comfort in knowing that she is looking down and is cheering you on to fight this disease and like Rosa said kick cancer butt. My sister who passed from breast cancer is right up there along side of your Mom I am sure, like two angels that they are.I am here if you need me and let me know how you are doing when you feel up to it. Love and God Bless
Debbie

confused

Brenda,
I'm very sorry to hear of your mothers passing. You are right when you say there's nothing like a mothers love and comfort. I'm also sorry about your new malignancy, and the fact that you have to go through treatment again.My prayers are with you!!!!!
Love,
Diane

jeancmici

Dear Brenda,

To be able to help you at all - or to comfort you - is a privilege and a pleasure. So many of us - myself included - have been already helped and comforted by you this past year.

Thinking of you now - this is the pain time of taxol - but hope it does its work the way it should.

Lots of hugs and love - and of course prayers too.
Jean

susanpecq

Dear Brenda,
We haven't met through postings or email yet but I feel compelled to reply to your message and to tell you that surely God is watching over you and will answer your prayers. I'm not a regular church-goer myself but do believe in God and his healing power. And I am sure He will do every thing in His power to help each one of us. Believing in Him and having faith that you will win your battle are two things you already have. You are also an incredible inspiration to all of us here to keep our own chins up and keep up the good fight.
All good things to you and "bisous"
Sue

shirlann

24242 said:

Dearest Brenda,
You are always close to our hearts and on our minds. We are grateful you take the time to let us know how you are doing. I am sorry that the year has been so difficult and so much to cope with. Remember your mother will always be with you cheering you on every step of the way just as we will be doing. Remember that we are hardest on our selves and we only want you to be gentle with yourself. Your love flows over with your words and we are with you all the way.
I am sorry you have had so much pain and sorry for the loss of your mother. I want yo to know that we also appreciate you and all your strenght and courage you allow us to see.
My HUG to you,
Love,
Tara

Hi, dear Brenda, I was 60 when I lost my mother and I still miss her! She did not know about my breast cancer, but I felt her love with me as well as the love of our Lord. I had started on anti-depressants about a year before I was dxed with BC. I truly feel the Lord was giving me something to help me! Think about a year or two for yourself. They are not addictive, altho you must carefully withdraw, and they are truly a blessing. God love you and hold you safely in his arms. Shirlann

lucy

HI Brenda - I want you to know that my prayers will be with you as you go through these treatments all over again. Also, I understand why you miss your mother while going through all of this, I have felt the same all through my breast cancer ordeal.
May God see you through this and give you everlasting life.
Lucy

julieanne

Brenda,
you all loved and I send my prayers to you. I am sorry for all you are going through. When you mentioned about repeating the taxol and said you had forgotten what it was like, forgot the pain, it brought me back to reality that this really did happen to me,try 5 months ago and I need to appreciate life even more.I was just complaining the other day about how my hair is coming in so curly and how I can't do anything with it. What an idiot I am, I am coming back nicely but yes, you do have in the back of your mind in that dark cave that it could all go away again. I hope I can build my strength in myself like you sound like you have and know that we are in this together. Hugs...Julieanne