I' m Back

pamtriggs · June 2001

Dear Everyone
Thank you all so much for your expressions of love & support while I was in hospital. I was finally released on Thursday pm but only after I threatened them with a writ of Habeous Corpus.

Pain is still not fully under control but I was going crazy in there (12 days in all) with all the terrible food etc. Auckland Hospital is quite old & being replaced in next 2 years so they won't spend any money in it decor wise.
I had bone scans & new chest & lung & abdominal CT while in there. No new tissue mets (lungs are under control & no liver mets showing) The drug Megace (Megastat or Farlutal here) has failed to stop bone mets & my figures are now very high again with new mets in sternum, ribs, sacrum. pelvis & femur. I had a one shot high radiation to sternum on Thursday & start chemo on 8 June. They are using Adriamycin only as it is the best for bone mets & the MEgace seems to keep the tissue mets under control. Still in a lot of pain but I refuse to take anymore morphine. I am already on 180mgs of Kapanol a day (slow release morphine)with top ups of Sevredol (20mg morphine) for breakthrough pain. Glad I bought that wig as I am now ready to go. Oh well - I have had my weep now its time to get fighting before Tiger gets her foot ready for a kick in the butt for feeling sorry for myself.

You messages were wonderful & John says you are a great group of people & we are lucky to have you all. I echo that. Love to you all

Pam

24242 · June 2001

It was nice of John to let us know how you were doing. Our thoughts and prayers are with you both. Pam your strength and courage to face you all you do is incredible. We have allot to learn from you.
Close to my heart,
24242Tara

cruf · June 2001

24242 said:
It was nice of John to let us know how you were doing. Our thoughts and prayers are with you both. Pam your strength and courage to face you all you do is incredible. We have allot to learn from you.
Close to my heart,
24242Tara

Welcome Home Pam. We really missed you! So sorry you're having so much pain. Hope the chemo does the job! You're a very strong person. We're all praying for you. Tell your hubby thanks for the info. and I hope he is feeling better too! HUGS!!!!! Cathy

nancys · June 2001

Hi Pam, You'd better shape up before Tiger gives you one of her famous "kick butt talks". She is such a good friend to everyone and she just forces us all to face up and fight. I have told her I do not know how she got so wise and strong at such an early age, Maybe getting sick has something to do with that. I know I am a different person and I read that from everyone. Pam, the May issue of Time magazine has a big section on many of the new cancer fighting drugs being developed, including Gleevec and Herceptin and information on the new research on antiangiogenesis. If John can not find this magazine, send me your address by email and I will mail you my copy. It is very hard to stay strong and cheerful when we have pain to deal with. I think pain is the worst four letter word I have ever heard. You WILL chase this beast away and feel good again. This will sound odd to you, but I pray for so many of us several times a day. I can be running the sweeper and stop to say a prayer. I know GOD must hear me and think, "oh no it's HER again" I know he answers our prayers in his own way, but he always gives us peace and faith when we pray for that, and that is what I beg to receive for all of us. Hope you will improve with each passing day. Lots of love and a big hug to you, Nancy

nancys · June 2001

Me Again, Pam. You spoke of hospital food and I have a story to share about that. My best friend was in the hospital for a week of tests for a heart problem. The food was awful and she complained about every meal to the server. One morning for breakfast, when she took her fancy siver cover off the plate, she found nothing but a "big onion", sliced in half. Her teapot had only hot water and no tea bag. She called me laughing and said the kitchen had proved their point and she was sure looking forward to lunch no matter what it was.... Nan

jeancmici · June 2001

Dear Pam,
Was so glad to read your message with your strength and fighting spirit still there.

It was so thoughtful of John to let us know about your new problems. It will be nice to be home and I wish you a good improvement or at least 'on hold'if that's the best the medicine can do.

I hope you are able to enjoy these days - my perspection of you is that you will!

Best to you and John . Love and hugs! Jean

bdean · June 2001

Dear Pam:
Praise the Lord you are home! I know something about bone pain, but not the intensity you have. A young friend who has metastasized bone tumors in spine has the slow release kind of morphine she can control that is implanted somewhere on her. She is a six year survivor and is only taking the Aredia now(which helps to repair bone damage)and the pain meds. Have your doctors not mentioned Aredia? It doesn't stop new leisions all together, but it does an amazing job on holding it from spreading as much. The friend I mentioned tumor is still there but has not grown or spread any more since going on the Aredia five years ago. She had gotten in such bad shape she had to go in a wheelchair for few weeks. Then this Aredia and lots of prayers kicked in and she started improving; and last month- her and husband just moved into a new home they had built!!! I have improved alot myself since going on this med. one year ago this week.
You are constantly in my prayers, and I will continue praying for your strength and God's mercy on you. His will be done always.
With many hugs and prayers,
Brenda from GA.

judyd · June 2001

Hi Pam, I was so glad to see your message on here. sorry things are not going real well for you right now. You have been such an inspiration to so many of us here. Just keep fighting. Sending positive thoughts & lots of prayers your way. I just pray each day that God will give us each the strength to get through that day. Judy

pamtriggs · June 2001

bdean said:
Dear Pam:
Praise the Lord you are home! I know something about bone pain, but not the intensity you have. A young friend who has metastasized bone tumors in spine has the slow release kind of morphine she can control that is implanted somewhere on her. She is a six year survivor and is only taking the Aredia now(which helps to repair bone damage)and the pain meds. Have your doctors not mentioned Aredia? It doesn't stop new leisions all together, but it does an amazing job on holding it from spreading as much. The friend I mentioned tumor is still there but has not grown or spread any more since going on the Aredia five years ago. She had gotten in such bad shape she had to go in a wheelchair for few weeks. Then this Aredia and lots of prayers kicked in and she started improving; and last month- her and husband just moved into a new home they had built!!! I have improved alot myself since going on this med. one year ago this week.
You are constantly in my prayers, and I will continue praying for your strength and God's mercy on you. His will be done always.
With many hugs and prayers,
Brenda from GA.

Thanks for the info on Aredia Brenda. I will see if it is available here. So many drugs avalable to you are not here as we are only a small country & can afford to approve only so many. Thanks for your love & support. The messages I have received have been amazing. It's wonderful to realise how so many people care when they have never met you. Lots of Love
Pam

cherdaetwyler · June 2001

Hi Pam,
Glad to see they let you come home.
I hope they have good antinausea for you with the Adriamycin.
I read you note last night, but a thunderstorm banged in and I got off. We have had an unusually large amount of rain for 3 weeks now. I stick plants into the mud whenever the sun comes out for a few hours.
You are right about tiger getting her foot ready. I can feel it coming. Ouch!

My prayers and thoughts are with you and John.
Love ya, cher

lucy · June 2001

Hi Pam - Thank you for letting us know that you are finally at home - that was wonderful news, as we have all been thinking of you. We also thank John for letting us know of your condition.
You sure do have a big battle on your hands- but you are a strong person, and you are a SURVIVOR - so give it your all. I wish you all the luck with your adriamyacin - and don't forget to take the Zofran for nausea - it helps. I sure hope this treatment takes care of those new mets.
Keep a positive attitude and let the Good Lord take care of you. My prayers will be with you each and every day.
Love, Lucy

slynne · June 2001

I'm so glad your back. I would check everyday for a message from you. My prayers are with you. Susan

debw · June 2001

So good to hear from you. I have been off line for a while, but always am thinking about you. You are such a dear person.
Love,
Debw

jane38 · June 2001

Hello Pam. Jane here. I'm back!!! I'm so sorry to hear you have been so ill. But you will beat this beast, I know you will. Wish I was there to give you a big Texas hug. But I'll do it here anyway and send it to you. I know I've been gone for a long time and I'm sure that I have missed a lot. Will you or Tiger or Auntie or Cher get me up to date? Hang in there Kiddo. We love you. And you ladies will never know how I have missed you.

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