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CT scan today

JanJan63's picture
JanJan63
Posts: 2482
Joined: Sep 2014

Just feeling bummed out. It's been six months since the last one. I get the results in about five days. Most of the time I can avoid thinking about the cancer and tell myself that I feel pretty good and it's probably gone but when I have to get a test done, whether its a blood test to check my CEA or something like this, it brings back the fear and makes me think about it again.

I started crying about a block from the hospital but managed to get myself under control before I went in. Then I found out I had to have an IV and wanted to cry again. I'm such a hard start and it's always a nightmare. At the same time I guess it's a clearer result if they do the IV and I'd rather have it done properly. And actually the nurse did a good job and it wasn't bad. It turned out that she remembered me from when I went in to emergency with the blood clot so we had a bit of a chat about that. Every time I run into someone who knew me from that time they're always excited because I wasn't expected to survive at all let alone be well again.

I'm going to start copying recipes for my daughter and writing on the backs of pictures we have in boxes and making notes about the history of certain things and things like that. Not because I don't have hope for a long life but I'll feel better if I do these things and know that whether I live a long time or not long it's done. I'd hate to have to do it if I knew I only had a short time left. And it would be so hard if I were physically incapacitated again.

Jan

NewHere's picture
NewHere
Posts: 1340
Joined: Feb 2015

The surgeries and initial treatments are harsh and having to go through the scans and waiting for the news stinks.  Sort of always a bit of a dose of "%&&* for the rest of our lives about the cancer.

Looking forward to hearing you had a good scan shortly.  I really wish it did not take days for results. :(

janderson1964
Posts: 2215
Joined: Oct 2011

Good luck

JanJan63's picture
JanJan63
Posts: 2482
Joined: Sep 2014

Thanks you guys. The CT tech said two to five days for results. I see my oncologist on Sept 4 and I don't know if the results will also be sent to my family doctor.

DD3's picture
DD3
Posts: 134
Joined: May 2013

got this.  Thoughts and prayers sent that way.

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