A Thought for the Caregivers (dedicated to all caregivers)

Buckwirth
Buckwirth Member Posts: 1,258 Member
edited June 2011 in Colorectal Cancer #1
Thought it might be a good time to revive this:

You were there when we discovered we were ill, and you shared our shock and pain

You were with us in the hospital, worrying while we slept

You stood by us when our moods got dark

You were there with us when the treatment seemed worse than the disease

You cooked special meals

You cleaned the house

You brought comfort in the dark

You give meaning to the struggle

And you are there, holding our hand as the struggle ends

Yours is the hardest job, and it is not possible to thank you enough
«13

Comments

  • Kathleen808
    Kathleen808 Member Posts: 2,342 Member
    #2
    Buckwirth
    Thank you.

    Aloha,
    Kathleen
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    #3
    Kathleen808 said:

    Buckwirth
    Thank you.

    Aloha,
    Kathleen

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • KathiM
    KathiM Member Posts: 8,028 Member
    #4
    Beautiful! And there is one more:
    You stand and accept ALL of the 'news'...when the professionals spare us warriors, they pick you to 'tell all' to...and you then die a bit inside, because you cannot talk it over with your best friend (your warrior).

    I always look at caregivers as special angels...not only do they deal with the devil (cancer), but then they are expected to keep doing all their 'normal' activities, as well....they are the unsung heros of this fight!!!!!

    BIG hugs to all, Kathi
  • tanker sgv
    tanker sgv Member Posts: 124
    #5
    speechless...
    Many post have given me strength or knowledge or inspiration, but your is the first to bring me to tears. For a cancer patient to say we have the hard job is such an honor. The courage that I saw in each person when I took my mom to her treatments to fight for there lives against this disease, for not only themselves but for there families made my job easy. So let me say thank you, you made me feel that I did everything I could for my mom and that she knew that I was there as she slept. I can't stop crying as I write this, you have given me much needed peace. You assured me my mom did not die alone and she really knew I was with her every step of the way. I was so scared for her to take that final step and feel alone not knowing I held her in my arms till her final breath. Thank you for giving me closer that I didn't know I needed until I read your post.
  • ktlcs
    ktlcs Member Posts: 358
    #6
    tanker sgv said:

    speechless...
    Many post have given me strength or knowledge or inspiration, but your is the first to bring me to tears. For a cancer patient to say we have the hard job is such an honor. The courage that I saw in each person when I took my mom to her treatments to fight for there lives against this disease, for not only themselves but for there families made my job easy. So let me say thank you, you made me feel that I did everything I could for my mom and that she knew that I was there as she slept. I can't stop crying as I write this, you have given me much needed peace. You assured me my mom did not die alone and she really knew I was with her every step of the way. I was so scared for her to take that final step and feel alone not knowing I held her in my arms till her final breath. Thank you for giving me closer that I didn't know I needed until I read your post.

    A beautiful sentiment
    I too was a caregiver throught my husband illness. I would do it all over again just to have him back

    This was a beautiul and caring post

    Thank You

    Kathy
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    #7
    ktlcs said:

    A beautiful sentiment
    I too was a caregiver throught my husband illness. I would do it all over again just to have him back

    This was a beautiul and caring post

    Thank You

    Kathy

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • ketziah35
    ketziah35 Member Posts: 1,145
    #8
    Thank you
    I have questioned my involvement in my mother's care. Due to crazy family issues, I wonder if I should have been there at all.
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    #9
    ketziah35 said:

    Thank you
    I have questioned my involvement in my mother's care. Due to crazy family issues, I wonder if I should have been there at all.

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • tina dasilva
    tina dasilva Member Posts: 641
    #10
    KathiM said:

    Beautiful! And there is one more:
    You stand and accept ALL of the 'news'...when the professionals spare us warriors, they pick you to 'tell all' to...and you then die a bit inside, because you cannot talk it over with your best friend (your warrior).

    I always look at caregivers as special angels...not only do they deal with the devil (cancer), but then they are expected to keep doing all their 'normal' activities, as well....they are the unsung heros of this fight!!!!!

    BIG hugs to all, Kathi

    AWESOME
    Awesome post as i read this post i tears come to my eyes .WOW what a post hugs Tina
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    #11
    unknown said:

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • taraHK
    taraHK Member Posts: 1,952 Member
    #12
    adding
    I'd like to add one more thing to be thankful for (although I cannot express as beautifully as Buckwirth)

    You supported the way I needed to handle things emotionally: when I needed to be "upbeat", you were upbeat alongside me; when I needed to cry, you cried with me; when I needed to obsess, you never questioned that, but when I needed to be distracted, you were right there with whatever distraction I needed.......

    Tara
  • pete43lost_at_sea
    pete43lost_at_sea Member Posts: 3,900 Member
    #13
    they have the hardest challenge
    blake,

    our suffering ends when it ends, often our carers grief continues on.
    "its not possible to thank them enough" this is so true
    my wife is running our business in the city while I look after the kids.
    i'll send her a little message of thanks.

    pete
  • ron50
    ron50 Member Posts: 1,723 Member
    #14
    A moving post
    And for some who had no caregivers and faced it all alone you also have my love and admiration,you are special heroes.hugs Ron.
  • johnnybegood
    johnnybegood Member Posts: 1,117 Member
    #15
    taraHK said:

    adding
    I'd like to add one more thing to be thankful for (although I cannot express as beautifully as Buckwirth)

    You supported the way I needed to handle things emotionally: when I needed to be "upbeat", you were upbeat alongside me; when I needed to cry, you cried with me; when I needed to obsess, you never questioned that, but when I needed to be distracted, you were right there with whatever distraction I needed.......

    Tara

    hey tara
    this is just beautiful,thanks for posting this thread buck...Godbless...johnnybegood
  • sharpy102
    sharpy102 Member Posts: 368 Member
    #16
    thank you
    @Buckwirth: As I was reading your note....I didn't realize how much I needed to hear what you wrote...all this time I was fighting with the fact that I failed and killed my most precious one, my Mom. Reading your post, made me realize that maybe I should not feel this way. I fought for her while no one else was there. And as you said, I'm sure my Mom knew how hard I tried, and that I loved her truly! Reflecting back I realized how much I was hiding my feelings from her...that fear that one day it will come and she'll leave me! The whole time I showed her that I'm strong, and I'm positive and that we'll win! And I only hope she knows how much I loved her...and I hope she remembers how I was there, laying next to hear as she left...I don't know. It's been a year already, but every night as I'm crawling into bed I keep staring at the window...I always hope she'll tap the window to let her in...I'm still waiting for her to come back! She promised me she'll talk to me and that she won't leave me alone...she hasn't said anything yet...and sometimes I get the feeling that maybe she forgot me already....maybe she doesn't like me anymore...where is she? When is she coming back? I really really hope that she knows that I love her, and everything I did for her while trying to make her stay alive I did with all my strength!
    Thank you so much for your post!
    Sophie
  • AnneCan
    AnneCan Member Posts: 3,673 Member
    #17
    sharpy102 said:

    thank you
    @Buckwirth: As I was reading your note....I didn't realize how much I needed to hear what you wrote...all this time I was fighting with the fact that I failed and killed my most precious one, my Mom. Reading your post, made me realize that maybe I should not feel this way. I fought for her while no one else was there. And as you said, I'm sure my Mom knew how hard I tried, and that I loved her truly! Reflecting back I realized how much I was hiding my feelings from her...that fear that one day it will come and she'll leave me! The whole time I showed her that I'm strong, and I'm positive and that we'll win! And I only hope she knows how much I loved her...and I hope she remembers how I was there, laying next to hear as she left...I don't know. It's been a year already, but every night as I'm crawling into bed I keep staring at the window...I always hope she'll tap the window to let her in...I'm still waiting for her to come back! She promised me she'll talk to me and that she won't leave me alone...she hasn't said anything yet...and sometimes I get the feeling that maybe she forgot me already....maybe she doesn't like me anymore...where is she? When is she coming back? I really really hope that she knows that I love her, and everything I did for her while trying to make her stay alive I did with all my strength!
    Thank you so much for your post!
    Sophie

    Sophie
    Your Mom knows + she loves + appreciates you for it. You stepped up big time at such a young age. Some adults would never have been able to do 1/2 of what you did. Be proud; you are an inspiration to me + I am honoured to know you.
  • AnneCan
    AnneCan Member Posts: 3,673 Member
    #18
    Buckwirth
    This is such a beautiful post. You + Malee are lucky to have each other. I hope you showed her your post.
  • gerryo
    gerryo Member Posts: 50
    #19
    I am a caregiver! I would
    I am a caregiver! I would not have it any other way. There is no one out there that can take of my husband as I can. I appreciate the thanks, but I don't believe we do it for that. I do it for the love I have for my husband of 45 years. We are in this together.
  • Kathleen808
    Kathleen808 Member Posts: 2,342 Member
    #20
    sharpy102 said:

    thank you
    @Buckwirth: As I was reading your note....I didn't realize how much I needed to hear what you wrote...all this time I was fighting with the fact that I failed and killed my most precious one, my Mom. Reading your post, made me realize that maybe I should not feel this way. I fought for her while no one else was there. And as you said, I'm sure my Mom knew how hard I tried, and that I loved her truly! Reflecting back I realized how much I was hiding my feelings from her...that fear that one day it will come and she'll leave me! The whole time I showed her that I'm strong, and I'm positive and that we'll win! And I only hope she knows how much I loved her...and I hope she remembers how I was there, laying next to hear as she left...I don't know. It's been a year already, but every night as I'm crawling into bed I keep staring at the window...I always hope she'll tap the window to let her in...I'm still waiting for her to come back! She promised me she'll talk to me and that she won't leave me alone...she hasn't said anything yet...and sometimes I get the feeling that maybe she forgot me already....maybe she doesn't like me anymore...where is she? When is she coming back? I really really hope that she knows that I love her, and everything I did for her while trying to make her stay alive I did with all my strength!
    Thank you so much for your post!
    Sophie

    Sophie
    Sophie,
    Your love for your mom is so pure and she knew it then and knows it now. She may not have spoken to you yet but she is guiding you. You are an amazing young woman. She is proud. We are proud of you.

    Aloha,
    Kathleen
  • herdizziness
    herdizziness Member Posts: 3,624 Member
    #21
    sharpy102 said:

    thank you
    @Buckwirth: As I was reading your note....I didn't realize how much I needed to hear what you wrote...all this time I was fighting with the fact that I failed and killed my most precious one, my Mom. Reading your post, made me realize that maybe I should not feel this way. I fought for her while no one else was there. And as you said, I'm sure my Mom knew how hard I tried, and that I loved her truly! Reflecting back I realized how much I was hiding my feelings from her...that fear that one day it will come and she'll leave me! The whole time I showed her that I'm strong, and I'm positive and that we'll win! And I only hope she knows how much I loved her...and I hope she remembers how I was there, laying next to hear as she left...I don't know. It's been a year already, but every night as I'm crawling into bed I keep staring at the window...I always hope she'll tap the window to let her in...I'm still waiting for her to come back! She promised me she'll talk to me and that she won't leave me alone...she hasn't said anything yet...and sometimes I get the feeling that maybe she forgot me already....maybe she doesn't like me anymore...where is she? When is she coming back? I really really hope that she knows that I love her, and everything I did for her while trying to make her stay alive I did with all my strength!
    Thank you so much for your post!
    Sophie

    Ohh Sophie
    You made me cry. She's your Mom, of course she realized you were there for her, and were next to her as she made her journey to another place and time.
    If there is a Heaven, she's watching over you and loving you. You'll always have her heart.
    As I've told my children, when I pass, look for a star in the sky, they'll know the right one when they see it. And it'll be me, shining down on them, pouring my everlasting love to them, I shall always be there, in their hearts, just like your mother is in yours, she will never ever leave your heart.
    Winter Marie

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