second try to say goodbye
laura
Comments
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tears to my eyes
Laura, you have brought me to tears....my heart is so heavy for you. I am still in the middle of my battle and still scared.........but wanting to beat this beast. I don't know what to say to you, but my heart is breaking for you. I don't know your situation or prognosis, and I cannot judge you or your feelings. I would wish you could get help to find the will to live...but this morning I am crying for you and feel so helpless. Huge hugs and prayers are sent your way dear sister.0 -
I too am at a loss for
I too am at a loss for words. My heart is so heavy for you and I wish I could give you a great big hug. No one should have to feel the way you do. I wish I could change the way your life changed since cancer...I wish I could change all of our lives.
I am very sad for you and hope you can find inner strength to continue. I read in your information page that you have three children. I am sure it has been hard for them to see you go through so much. Have you thought about seeking help?
I know I am not in your shoes exactly. I am starting my battle today with my first chemo treatment. But I know I have two kids who love me so much and are here for me. I want to get through this so I can be here for them. Your letter scares me...it sounds like a suicide note. I don't know you, but I beg for you to think about things and seek help. Message me if you like. I am pulling for you that God gives you strength!
Love,
Michelle0 -
You made me cry,
Please don't do this, let some time pass and think about your kids. You sister would not want you to feel like this. She would want you to seek some help. And your sister lives in you and your kids.Please Please talk to your Dr, or call a help line you can talk to them on the phone its free. Cancer.org Phone 1-800-227-2345. Please don't say goodbye We need you here. We are all here for you. And death is a permanent solution for a temporary problem. Please let us help you through. We are all here for you. Love your sister Kay0 -
Laura
I feel so terrible for you and wonder what has happened to make you feel this way.... you say that no one but your sister loved you but I remember seeing in another post where you said you have children and in specific a 12 year old daughter... please remember that she/they love and need you. I lost my mom to breast cancer when I was 14 and my life changed forever. I often wonder if I would be a different person (maybe a better person?) had my mom lived to see me into adulthood. My mom wasn't there to see me go to the prom, graduate, get married and have children of my own. I would never want that for my kids and I will fight ever minute to be here with them even if I thought that no one else loved me...my children are my everything...
I know kids can be mouthy and disrespectful in their tween years but that doesn't mean they don't love/need you... I am hoping that you will read the many posts that our other sisters have left here for you and reconsider what you have said.
Sending positive thoughts and love your way,
Dot0 -
Laura, I believe that the
Laura, I believe that the spirit's of our loved ones can hear us if we talk to them. Don't even have to do it out loud. They aren't far away and I'm sure your sister is pulling for you to get through this. Talk to your doctor. He can prescribe medication to help. You have to think of your children. Draw strength from them and think of the painted rocks you all made. Life is a gift and we need to make the most of it. All of us here are behind you. Hugs.0 -
Laura dear Laura
Your children need you and you need them. You do not want to miss out on your children and future grand children.
You are a wonderful warrior, and you are a part of why this site is so wonderful. Don't give up. Get help please.
Take care, hugs 2 u
Jennifer0 -
Dear, dear LauraMarcia527 said:Laura, I believe that the
Laura, I believe that the spirit's of our loved ones can hear us if we talk to them. Don't even have to do it out loud. They aren't far away and I'm sure your sister is pulling for you to get through this. Talk to your doctor. He can prescribe medication to help. You have to think of your children. Draw strength from them and think of the painted rocks you all made. Life is a gift and we need to make the most of it. All of us here are behind you. Hugs.
I am so sorry that you are feeling this way. I hope you find the strength to stay here for your kids. My mother died when she was 35 (I was 11) and it forever changed my life. Like the post above she didn't get to see me graduate, get married, have kids, etc. It was extremely difficult for me to grow up without a mother. I can't even begin to tell you. I recently found out (I'm 54) that she actually took her own life. She left a 16 page note to my dad and us kids and said some of the same things that you are saying. She just felt she couldn't go on another day. But let me tell you, it was the hardest thing I've ever had to read in my life. It affects me today as it did in 1967. I will NEVER get over losing my mom.
So, please, please, please find the help you need. Whether it is spiritual, medication, therapy and all of the above, you must be there for your kids.
If you want to talk personally, please p.m. me anytime.
With love and prayers,
Patti0 -
Laura.
I am crying as I am writting here.You are someone that helped me so much when I was going through my battle with the beast.I really don,t know what to say other then I am so sorry.I will be Praying for you.I Pray you have a pastor you can talk to.Please make sure it isn,t depression talking.You can get help for that.But I do relize that we all have our breaking point.We love you very much.xxoo Pat.0 -
Laurams.sunshine said:Laura dear Laura
Your children need you and you need them. You do not want to miss out on your children and future grand children.
You are a wonderful warrior, and you are a part of why this site is so wonderful. Don't give up. Get help please.
Take care, hugs 2 u
Jennifer
I'm sending you positive thoughts and energy. I imagine you're tired and depressed, distraught and thoroughly empty. Try to get some rest. It's hard to think clearly when you're exhausted and things are bleak.
xo,
Victoria0 -
I am so sorry for the way
I am so sorry for the way you are feeling. Please talk to someone about this, a pastor, suppport group or your Onc. for meds if it is depression. I am taking something to help me out. Will be praying for you. God Bless
(((Hugs))) Janice0 -
What has happened??!?ppurdin said:Laura.
I am crying as I am writting here.You are someone that helped me so much when I was going through my battle with the beast.I really don,t know what to say other then I am so sorry.I will be Praying for you.I Pray you have a pastor you can talk to.Please make sure it isn,t depression talking.You can get help for that.But I do relize that we all have our breaking point.We love you very much.xxoo Pat.
Laura,
What's going on, sweet sister?? Please, come back here and let us try and help you through whatever is going on! Death is not the answer to all questions, my dear. It simply isn't. I agree that life has it's tipping point, and sometimes we just feel like we're going to tip over with it. Please grab on to whatever life preserver you can find.....medication.....friends....support groups.....us....whatever it takes to get you through this rough patch.
We are standing here with our arms outstretched, waiting to catch you when you jump. Please don't let cancer win this battle.
Jennifer0 -
What can I say. We all have
What can I say. We all have felt this way at one time or another and posting here is your way of reaching out in search of the support that you are lacking. We are all here and we are listening. A permenant solution is not the answer to a temporary problem. Even if we cannot touch you physically, our souls are all bound by the journey that we have and are taking. If I could reach you, I would hug you so tightly and hold you to me until the fear was all gone but since I cannot do that I can only tell you that there is someone out there who does care about you and wants for your life to be better than it is right now. I can encourage you until I am blue but you have to want it for yourself. Help us, help you.
Hugs
Donna0 -
Old Post
Found this post from last year:
October 19, 2009 - 5:17pm
My name is megan. My mom is laura or lolad. My mom told me i could talk to you for a min. My mom told me about everyone here because she is on the computer alot. I want to tell you thank you for helping my mom. She is my hero and i love her. She is a survivor and you helped her. thank you for listning to me and i love my mom.
megan
I hope you can find the strength to get through this. Your sister may be in heaven, but she is also here with you trying to help you through this. Look for signs of her and you will see she is here.
Bob0 -
DepressedBlownAway60 said:What can I say. We all have
What can I say. We all have felt this way at one time or another and posting here is your way of reaching out in search of the support that you are lacking. We are all here and we are listening. A permenant solution is not the answer to a temporary problem. Even if we cannot touch you physically, our souls are all bound by the journey that we have and are taking. If I could reach you, I would hug you so tightly and hold you to me until the fear was all gone but since I cannot do that I can only tell you that there is someone out there who does care about you and wants for your life to be better than it is right now. I can encourage you until I am blue but you have to want it for yourself. Help us, help you.
Hugs
Donna
I was DX April 15 2009. So we did this together.You are suffering from depression. Don't give into this. There is plenty of medication to help you. Your children need you, like you need your sister. Your sister will wait for you. Right now you have to correct whats wrong and don't leave your children behind to suffer your loss. They will never understand. I lost my dad when I was 8. He died from cancer and I really never as a young chid understood why I did not have a dad and everyone else did. For me it was terrible, not to have a dad. My mom was a good mom she did what she could to take his place. Please think about what you will leave behind and how much you are loved by them. The feelings your having, can be solved, with some help. Please ask you doctor for it. Remember we care.
Lots of hugs.
Kathy0 -
Praying that you can get thru this time. Donna is so right..BlownAway60 said:What can I say. We all have
What can I say. We all have felt this way at one time or another and posting here is your way of reaching out in search of the support that you are lacking. We are all here and we are listening. A permenant solution is not the answer to a temporary problem. Even if we cannot touch you physically, our souls are all bound by the journey that we have and are taking. If I could reach you, I would hug you so tightly and hold you to me until the fear was all gone but since I cannot do that I can only tell you that there is someone out there who does care about you and wants for your life to be better than it is right now. I can encourage you until I am blue but you have to want it for yourself. Help us, help you.
Hugs
Donna
our souls are bound and we are hugging you with them.
Cathy0 -
Hubby's post says it allHubby said:Old Post
Found this post from last year:
October 19, 2009 - 5:17pm
My name is megan. My mom is laura or lolad. My mom told me i could talk to you for a min. My mom told me about everyone here because she is on the computer alot. I want to tell you thank you for helping my mom. She is my hero and i love her. She is a survivor and you helped her. thank you for listning to me and i love my mom.
megan
I hope you can find the strength to get through this. Your sister may be in heaven, but she is also here with you trying to help you through this. Look for signs of her and you will see she is here.
Bob
Hubby's post says it all laura.0 -
I am at a loss for words,Hubby said:Old Post
Found this post from last year:
October 19, 2009 - 5:17pm
My name is megan. My mom is laura or lolad. My mom told me i could talk to you for a min. My mom told me about everyone here because she is on the computer alot. I want to tell you thank you for helping my mom. She is my hero and i love her. She is a survivor and you helped her. thank you for listning to me and i love my mom.
megan
I hope you can find the strength to get through this. Your sister may be in heaven, but she is also here with you trying to help you through this. Look for signs of her and you will see she is here.
Bob
I am at a loss for words, you r daughter says it all. sometimes this makes you feel anxious and sad, and alone. please dont give up. fight.0 -
Survivors Guiltcarkris said:I am at a loss for words,
I am at a loss for words, you r daughter says it all. sometimes this makes you feel anxious and sad, and alone. please dont give up. fight.
It isn't easy watching others go before us and especially those we have shared such bonds with this I know for sure. The losses are too great sometimes though we know there is this flow to life we can feel with our every breath. Times are tough enough trying not to think about the possible out comes and being tired and sick and tired doesn't make it easy to see things in a fresh light.
I have lost a few of my very dear loves in life who had to go before their time and I just know that they will live long through everyone they touched if we just allow them too. It isn't easy being a survivor when others haven't been able to survive as much but LOVE sometimes is all there is. Death complicates the thoughts we have and sometimes knock us back a whole pile of steps and not easy to overcome.
My hope and wish for you is that you can remember those around you and how hard it is on them. Thanks Hubby for finding the message because that truly is as simple as it gets.
Tara0 -
Oh my gosh!!!Hubby said:Old Post
Found this post from last year:
October 19, 2009 - 5:17pm
My name is megan. My mom is laura or lolad. My mom told me i could talk to you for a min. My mom told me about everyone here because she is on the computer alot. I want to tell you thank you for helping my mom. She is my hero and i love her. She is a survivor and you helped her. thank you for listning to me and i love my mom.
megan
I hope you can find the strength to get through this. Your sister may be in heaven, but she is also here with you trying to help you through this. Look for signs of her and you will see she is here.
Bob
I can't read anymore with the tears in my eyes. Please believe that there is something good in store for you. We are all right here standing beside you.
Every time I have a fretful apppointment or have to speak with the onc. I feel all the positive vibes and prayers that eminate from this board.
Please contact your doctor, your clergy or someone from The American Cancer Society, we need you too!
Positive thoughts and prayers coming your way,
Edie0
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