Recently diagnosed, surgery pending, scared to death!

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Rose84
Rose84 Member Posts: 11
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
I have been recently diagnosed with breast cancer and am scheduled for surgery in early July. I am more than a bit worried about this whole process. I have cancer in one breast and an "area of suspicion" in the other so I opted to do a double mastectomy with reconstruction so I only have to dance with the devil one time. I am going to have a TRAM procedure done for the reconstruction. The whole process is scarry and I just don't know what to expect. Any advice? I have researched the whole "mess" and have a good support network from my children and friends. Just making worry a part of my day now!
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  • outdoorgirl
    outdoorgirl Member Posts: 1,565
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    Rose,
    Just wanted to welcome you to the board. Sorry that you are having to go through this! I havn't been down your road,so I can't offer any advice-but there are plenty of women here who can.
    I'm hoping and praying for the best for you!
    Patty
  • Rose84
    Rose84 Member Posts: 11
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    Rose,
    Just wanted to welcome you to the board. Sorry that you are having to go through this! I havn't been down your road,so I can't offer any advice-but there are plenty of women here who can.
    I'm hoping and praying for the best for you!
    Patty

    Thanks outdoor girl for your prayers and support. It means a lot.
  • Aortus
    Aortus Member Posts: 967
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    You're stronger than you think
    It seems to me like you have already taken the bull by the horns, Rose, when you decided on what surgery to have. There will continue to be moments of fear - the same fears everyone in your position has faced. It won't be easy, but with love and prayer and support and your own internal strength, you WILL make it. May God bless you!

    Joe
  • Kat11
    Kat11 Member Posts: 1,931 Member
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    Aortus said:

    You're stronger than you think
    It seems to me like you have already taken the bull by the horns, Rose, when you decided on what surgery to have. There will continue to be moments of fear - the same fears everyone in your position has faced. It won't be easy, but with love and prayer and support and your own internal strength, you WILL make it. May God bless you!

    Joe

    Hi Rose and welcome. The
    Hi Rose and welcome. The name of the game is fear and waiting. I just had surgery 3 weeks ago. So before surgery, you fear what else they might find,will there be pain, and you wait to find out. After surgery you fear the treatment and you wait to find out what all it going to be. Thats as far as I have gotton so far. I start Chemo in 2 weeks. Good luck to you
  • padee6339
    padee6339 Member Posts: 763
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    Welcome Rose
    I had my lumpectomy last October and just 2 weeks ago finished the last of my treatments (chemo and rads). You don't know where you will find the strength to get through it, but you do. Its there, buried inside you. We are here for you to talk to and send lots of hugs to get you through this new journey in your life.
    Pat
  • taleena
    taleena Member Posts: 1,612 Member
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    Rose, I am sorry for your dx
    Rose, I am sorry for your dx but you've come to the right place for support. This is an amazing group of people who support eachother from dx to well beyond being disease free... I hope you will participate often... this board has at times been my life line... it's a wonderful place to ask for information, there are many who have already completed the journey you are now embarking on as well as many who are just beginning the process... welcome... we are here for you!

    Hugs,

    ~T
  • Moopy23
    Moopy23 Member Posts: 1,751 Member
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    Waiting
    Hi, Rose, I also welcome you though I am sorry for your diagnosis. As Kat wrote, waiting and fear are pretty much to be expected right now. The good news is that this is the worst time. After your surgery and receiving the pathology report, your doctors will be able to advise you as to what, if any, further treatment is needed or recommended.

    As far as the dance with the devil, you can expect many appointments and tests. For awhile, doctors and clinics will determine where and when you are on any given day. They don't ask when you want to come in: I guess they figure beating cancer is your priority as far as activities for your day.

    Your description "dance with the devil" is a good one. Just keep in mind that everything you are experiencing, everything you will do, is so that you end up dancing with NED. Who is NED?--no evidence of disease. So, hang in there. You have a great attitude already, and you will find lots of support here.
  • Ltalcott
    Ltalcott Member Posts: 119
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    similar situations
    I had a very similar situation to what you are doing. You won't know a lot about the rest of your treatment until pathology comes back after the mastectomies.

    I had a diagnosis through biopsy with invasive ductal carcinoma on the left side. Made the decision to do bialateral because I'd been arguing with things for years (I'd had 3-4 biopsies and a lumpectomy.) I also had a tiny spot on the right--no one really thought it was anything, but they decided to biospy before surgery to make sure.

    The right side was IDC also. Didn't change my decision at all, but sure knocked me on my tail. It wasn't cancer spreading from one breast to the other, two separate occurences at the same time. After all, I took both of them the same places, so they were both exposed to the same things--same genetic make-up.

    It did change the sentinel node biopsy--they did both sides, and I had no node involvement on either side. If the cancer in the right hadn't been found until after the mastectomies were done, they would have had to take all the lymph nodes, you can't go back and do the sentinal node biopsy. So if they can biopsy your suspicious area before the surgery, it might make sense. I'd ask.

    Because my tumors were small (1.4 and .6 centimeters) and because my Oncotype DX scores were low (9 and 16), my benefit from chemo would be non-existent--and the risk of long-term side effects (heart damage, other cancers) didn't make that treatment reasonable.

    So, after the surgery, my treatment is basically over. I'm taking Tamoxifen for 5 years--May 1, 2009 through April 30, 2014 but I've had no side effects at all.

    I had DIEP flap reconstruction at the time of surgery--just a varation of TRAM that's a little more complicated. I was in surgery for 17 hours! No major complications, but I was in the ICU for two days, in the hospital for 7 days, and back to work at 6 weeks. I'm now 3 1/2 months out of surgery, and I'm back at the gym working out every morning--sit-ups don't work yet, ha, ha! But, as others will tell you, the part you are doing now--waiting, getting tests--that's the hard part. Even if you have chemo or rads, at least then you are involved in the fight.

    Welcome to the discussion board.
    Lisa
  • outdoorgirl
    outdoorgirl Member Posts: 1,565
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    Moopy23 said:

    Waiting
    Hi, Rose, I also welcome you though I am sorry for your diagnosis. As Kat wrote, waiting and fear are pretty much to be expected right now. The good news is that this is the worst time. After your surgery and receiving the pathology report, your doctors will be able to advise you as to what, if any, further treatment is needed or recommended.

    As far as the dance with the devil, you can expect many appointments and tests. For awhile, doctors and clinics will determine where and when you are on any given day. They don't ask when you want to come in: I guess they figure beating cancer is your priority as far as activities for your day.

    Your description "dance with the devil" is a good one. Just keep in mind that everything you are experiencing, everything you will do, is so that you end up dancing with NED. Who is NED?--no evidence of disease. So, hang in there. You have a great attitude already, and you will find lots of support here.

    Moops,
    Don't know if it's tamoxifen-messed with hormones,menopause,or what but I just got teary eyed reading your response!! You're a real sweetheart!
  • dmc_emmy
    dmc_emmy Member Posts: 549
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    Rose84-fear is part of our survival....
    It sounds like an oximoran, but it's true. Fear is normal and it's something that comes with being told that you have bc. It sounds, though, that you are being proactive and that is a great attitude.

    As to what to expect, I think the ladies before me explained it well. Surgery, chemo, possibly rads, and then drugs. You may, or may not, have side effects from the meds, and you could have minimal side effects from the other treatments. If you, however, do become nauseated from chemo, there are some wonderful anti-nausea drugs that your oncologist can prescribe. You may, or may not, lose your hair and you may, or may not, have a metal taste in your mouth. I ride the fence on these, because everyone is different.

    As for rads: you may, or may not, experience a "sunburn." I had minimal irritation from rads, but used an aloe cream and alfaphor (sp?) to relieve it.

    As for meds: again, everyone is different as to how they react. Some have minimal or no side effects, while others have extreme side effects. Once again, however, your med team can guide you through as to how best eleviate, or minimize, the side effects (should you have any).

    I wish you well. You will soon be on the road to recovery once surgery is done. I welcome you to the boards, but sorry for your dx. You'll find an amazing amount of support here.
    dmc
  • cats_toy
    cats_toy Member Posts: 1,462 Member
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    Rose
    Scary yes! no one will tell you otherwise. But try not to let the fear rule you. Sounds like you have already decided to beat this so that is a great first step. If you have faith in your doctors, let them guide you on the journey, they will be there every step of the way. We will too. Just ask the question, and you already see the response. Let us know how it goes and when your surgery will be.
    =^..^=
  • maryannrogers
    maryannrogers Member Posts: 115
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    cats_toy said:

    Rose
    Scary yes! no one will tell you otherwise. But try not to let the fear rule you. Sounds like you have already decided to beat this so that is a great first step. If you have faith in your doctors, let them guide you on the journey, they will be there every step of the way. We will too. Just ask the question, and you already see the response. Let us know how it goes and when your surgery will be.
    =^..^=

    Rose
    You've come to the right place. These ladies are awesome. I know they have all put their arms around me when I started posting.

    I got home from surgery 2 days ago and am now staying at my daughters. I had a modified radical masect on the right side and all lymph nodes were taken under my arm. Talk about scared, I thought I was having a heart attack before I went in for the surgery. All I can say is hang in there. Iknow I wasn't a good patient either as I was pissed at the whole world. It is not as bad as I anticipated. They make you as comfortable as possible, had a wonderful support team and am recouping now. I don't know what the future will bring me as far as treatment yet, but as much of a chicken as I am, I feel I will handle whatever needs to be handled.

    God bless you and stay with us.

    Love,
    Maryann
  • Jeanne D
    Jeanne D Member Posts: 1,867
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    Hi Rose!
    I just want to welcome you Rose84 to the site. Although, I am sorry it is because of your diagnosis of bc. I wish I could help you with answers on the TRAM procedure, but, I had a lumpectomy and can't be of any help. But, others here will post and help you out. Good luck with your surgery and please keep us posted!
  • Eil4186
    Eil4186 Member Posts: 949
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    Hi Rose, welcome and I am
    Hi Rose, welcome and I am sorry you have to go through this. I know it is very scary, but you will get through it ok. I had a lumpectomy so I can't advise on the tram. I wish you the best of luck and am here for you if you need support. Eil
  • jk1952
    jk1952 Member Posts: 613
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    TRAM

    Welcome to this group, and we are all very sorry that you have had the diagnosis that makes you a member.

    Everyone has done a great job of encouragement and telling you what to expect. You've come a long way in decision-making and planning, and those are very difficult times. I had a similar situation to you, but I had the bilateral mastectomy and reconstruction, on April 22nd, nine years after having my original cancer diagnosis.

    For me, one breast was reconstructed using the DIEP procedure and the other with the free TRAM flap procedure, which is very similar to the DIEP. Are you having the TRAM procedure where they tunnel the tissue up through your body, or will the plastic surgeon detach the tissue and fat from your abdomen and then reattach the blood supply under your arm? My procedures were the detach/reattach kinds. Lisa described that surgery well, but if you have additional questions, just ask. By the way, the ICU is so they can check your blood flow regularly; it's not because you are very sick.

    I wish you well with your surgeries and your journey.

    Joyce

    Joyce
  • CR1954
    CR1954 Member Posts: 1,390 Member
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    Welcome Rose........
    Welcome Rose. I'm very glad that you found us.

    I had mastectomy, but did not have reconstruction, so I have no advice there. But please take to heart what everyone has said here and know that we will be with you every step of the way. Don't hesitate to voice your concerns and your questions.

    Hugs,

    CR
  • DianeBC
    DianeBC Member Posts: 3,881 Member
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    CR1954 said:

    Welcome Rose........
    Welcome Rose. I'm very glad that you found us.

    I had mastectomy, but did not have reconstruction, so I have no advice there. But please take to heart what everyone has said here and know that we will be with you every step of the way. Don't hesitate to voice your concerns and your questions.

    Hugs,

    CR

    Just want to say welcome to
    Just want to say welcome to you Rose too and to say that I will pray that you find strength. We are here to support you so please keep us updated.
  • cruf
    cruf Member Posts: 908
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    DianeBC said:

    Just want to say welcome to
    Just want to say welcome to you Rose too and to say that I will pray that you find strength. We are here to support you so please keep us updated.

    Tram Flap
    Hi Rose! Welcome! I had a single Tram Flap almost 9 years ago. I would be willing to try to answer any questions. Please e-mail me here and I will help you as much as I can. I, too, was terrified but it wasn't as bad as I feared. HUGS!! Cathy
  • DianeBC
    DianeBC Member Posts: 3,881 Member
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    cruf said:

    Tram Flap
    Hi Rose! Welcome! I had a single Tram Flap almost 9 years ago. I would be willing to try to answer any questions. Please e-mail me here and I will help you as much as I can. I, too, was terrified but it wasn't as bad as I feared. HUGS!! Cathy

    Rose, how are you doing
    Rose, how are you doing today? Please post and let us know.
  • jnl
    jnl Member Posts: 3,869 Member
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    CR1954 said:

    Welcome Rose........
    Welcome Rose. I'm very glad that you found us.

    I had mastectomy, but did not have reconstruction, so I have no advice there. But please take to heart what everyone has said here and know that we will be with you every step of the way. Don't hesitate to voice your concerns and your questions.

    Hugs,

    CR

    Welcome Rose. I am so sorry
    Welcome Rose. I am so sorry that you feel scared. Just know that we are all here to comfort and support you. Please post and keep us updated on you!