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How quickly things change

Donna Faye's picture
Donna Faye
Posts: 430
Joined: Jan 2017

I have done very well since deciding no more treatment and joined hospice to have someon to contact. Up until January 15. Was prefectly fine and then cancer hit with a vengence. Thankfully they put me in a hospice care unit for 7 days. Felt awful and frankly was ready to call the game, but alas they got me stable and sent me home today. This perituneum cancer is not good. Guess as to future- weeks to months. Weeks sounds better to me, but we'll see. I think of Cheese often as we shared th type and she was so honest with her feelings.

Hugs All! df

cmb's picture
cmb
Posts: 594
Joined: Jan 2018

Donna Faye,

You've been such an inspiration to me and others on this site in how to live a full and meaningful life with this disease. Thank you for all your advice and the wonderful support you shown to others, despite your own struggles.

I dearly wish that hospice can keep you pain free and that your remaining time, whether long or short, be peaceful and surrounded with love from your family. I know that all the pragmatic lifestyle steps you took over the past couple of years will help to make this possible.

Know that I am with you in spirit during this time.

Tamlen's picture
Tamlen
Posts: 281
Joined: Jan 2018

Donna Faye, your presence on this board has meant so much to me -- your support, your outlook, your joy at living, your sharing your experiences with drugs and options many of us haven't had yet. Thank you for being you!

As cmb said, I hope your time ahead is filled with joy and love and is pain free. We'll be here with you. Big big hug.

Tamlen

NoTimeForCancer's picture
NoTimeForCancer
Posts: 2841
Joined: Mar 2013

Donna Faye, I couldn't put it any better than cmb.  I pray for your comfort and your family.  

oldbeauty
Posts: 286
Joined: May 2012

Well, this is a kick in the pants, is it not?  CMB's elegant post really says it all.  You have been an inspiration to me, I'll tell you.  Thank you for helping me overcome irrational fear so that I can be  more effective in facing facts and charting a plan.  You owe us nothing, of course, but I have so valued your frank explorations of your feelings and decision-making processes.  Especially now that you are speaking without sugar-coating that you are engaged in end of life planning.  That ability to do so is awesome and a valuable service to us here.

It sounds as if you have engaged with a caring and effective hospice service.  May you continue to be comfortable and at peace.  You are fortunate indeed to be in the care of family who loves you so. Rest easy and take your joy where you find it.  You are in my heart-felt thoughts as you travel this path.  You are not alone.  Best wishes, Oldbeauty

 

Fridays Child
Posts: 196
Joined: Jul 2019

Donna Faye, I'm so sorry you had such a rough week.  Like others, I really appreciate your insight and your thoughts about the road we all travel, and pray that hospice can keep you comfortable.  Prayers for you and your family as you navigate these next steps.

Forherself's picture
Forherself
Posts: 464
Joined: Jan 2019

Thank you for your update.   I am glad you can share your journey still among those who understand and are grateful for your words of wisdom. I pray for your comfort and peace of mind.  We hold you in our hearts.

BluebirdOne
Posts: 366
Joined: Jul 2018

Thank you so much for coming back after what has to been a very difficult time for you, to do as you have done best which is to educate us about your journey. Your sharing of your life with us has been invaluable, supporting all of us and those to come with your experiences, love, and caring. It has been an honor to know you. 

xxoo

Denise 

Donna Faye's picture
Donna Faye
Posts: 430
Joined: Jan 2017

Dear Friends, Thank you for the kind thoughts. It is 2 am EST and I have just had an accident in my depends. That beautiful boy in the pic with me heard my bell and quickly got me to the bathroom. We have worked out a system where I can handle clean up but he has a lot to get me there and back. It is just the 2 of us tonight so he has been on nursing duty for the night. Tears are fallling as I write. Beautiful tears of gratitude ! I am in loving hands...the best gift in all this world. I am at peace in my soul. 

cmb's picture
cmb
Posts: 594
Joined: Jan 2018

A loving family – a blessing anytime, but especially now. Feeling gratitude for a life well lived is what I hope that I'll feel as I reach my end – whenever that happens. But in your case, it's not "luck" that you feel this way – only a reflection of the love you've shared with your children and others.

Thank you for continuing to share your thoughts and experiences during this time. So often those we've become close to through this site understandably withdraw to their closest family and friends as they near the end of their life's journey. But I find it comforting to know that peaceful acceptance is possible, if that's what one wants and feels. While your contributions have always been very valuable, those shared now are a gift to the rest of us.

MoeKay
Posts: 301
Joined: Feb 2004

Donna Faye, I hope cmb doesn't mind my plagarizing her above comments, but I know I couldn't have said it better.  I will only add that I'm so happy you're feeling better and are back home in such good company.  And I really miss Cheese Queen too!

EZLiving66's picture
EZLiving66
Posts: 1452
Joined: Oct 2015

Donna, you and Susan, the Queen of Cheese are my heroes! You both fought with everything you had but were able to see there comes a time when the quality of life is more important than the quantity. I hope when my times come I'm able to emulate you and Susan.

Love,

Eldri

Maxster
Posts: 56
Joined: Apr 2020

Your words have been a wonderful gift.  I wish you peace in your journey.  I am so happy you have these loving family members with you.

MAbound
Posts: 1091
Joined: Jun 2016

Donna Faye, it's been such an honor to "know" you. Your words here have been a comfort and uplifting to so many. You will be so dearly missed, but always remembered. Thank you for sharing your journey with us and give your son a hug from me. It helps to visualize how good he's been to you through all of this. 

LisaPizza's picture
LisaPizza
Posts: 331
Joined: Feb 2018

When my dad was dying a few years ago (well, five now, doesn't feel like so many), the doctors told him more than once what wonderful children he had and how lucky he was. We always answered that it's because we had wonderful parents and we were the lucky ones. I know the same is true for you and your sons. No matter what life brings or when death comes, loving family is the one true blessing, and what matters most. Not only to you, but to your sons as well, you can rest assured of that. Well done. Love to you and yours.

Frances081920
Posts: 20
Joined: Aug 2020

Donna Faye you are an inspiration to all God bless you I am praying for your spiritual and physical comfort

Molly110
Posts: 182
Joined: Oct 2019

Donna Faye, may God bless you and keep you and comfort your family. Thank you for sharing yourself so generously with the women on this board.

Molly

TeddyandBears_Mom's picture
TeddyandBears_Mom
Posts: 1707
Joined: Jun 2015

Donna Faye, thank you for all of the care and sharing you have provided us. I pray that you continue to be kept comfortable and I'm comforted knowing you will be surrounded by those that love you most. You are leaving our world a better place just by being you. Until we meet again sweet lady. Love you.

Love and Hugs,

Cindi

Afoste3
Posts: 5
Joined: Jun 2020

I'm here to support my mom; all the ladies who posted have captured what you mean to everyone here with so much eloquence.  For me I think it's that you look things right in the face and make decisions that are from a place of love and acceptance, not fear.  Like cmb said it's very comforting to know the transition to whatever comes next can be met with peace.  I'm sending thoughts that you can stay pain-free during this time.  I know you'll be surrounded by loving family, so that's taken care of :)

Anne-Marie

alicia2020
Posts: 64
Joined: Sep 2020

Even though I've only been a part of this board for a relatively short period of time, I have been blessed to get to know you. You've been in my prayers for months, thinking of you often, and hoping and wishing for only the best for you. The outpouring of love and gratitude extended to you from our friends here and from your loved ones with you at home, is a reflection of all the love you have given to them. You a truly a woman to be loved and admired. 
I wish you comfort and peace.

With love, Alicia

NoTimeForCancer's picture
NoTimeForCancer
Posts: 2841
Joined: Mar 2013

Dearest Donna Faye, I want you to know this:

I LOVE YOU!

Not going to wait for someday.  Today is the day.

Donna Faye's picture
Donna Faye
Posts: 430
Joined: Jan 2017

I have never been by anyone dying. I could not get there in time due to distance, but I had always said my goodbyes before the end. Because I was told I could die 22 years ago, and cancer continued to plague me, our family has nothing left to talk about. We are all on the same page which makes it so much easier. I have attended death cafes where we talk about death and dying and learn so much from each other. My grandsons are on board and seem to understand my time is near. I remember when at Thanksgiving, Cheese said I feel like crap. That is sort of how I'm feeling. Trying to get my digestive track to work better seems hard for the docs to figure out. Either too much or not enough) :  I soldier on as my caregivers are making me get up every 2 hours to walk about. Kindly I will add, as sometimes I don't want to move. I love you ladies and keep you in my heart.

jan9wils's picture
jan9wils
Posts: 146
Joined: Mar 2017

I am thinking of you with gratitude and love. Wishing for your comfort and knowing you are feeling peaceful. I will continue to lift you and your family up in prayer.

Jan

dgrdalton's picture
dgrdalton
Posts: 146
Joined: Jun 2017

It was so sad to read your message last night. I do understand much of what you have gone through and am thankful you have your family to love, support and care for you. You were one of the first ladies that I followed on this group. I had a similar diagnosis as you just a couple of months after you. You have been an inspiration to me. I do want to say goodbye for now and pray for a peaceful ending with family surrounding you until your new beginning on the other side. Will look forward to reading your posts as long as you feel up to it.

With love, prayers and tears,

Donna D

Donswife48
Posts: 327
Joined: Nov 2015

I just saw this and wanted to say I too love you - and for keeping this real.  I know when your time has ended, you and your family are completely at peace.  You are so blessed to be surrounded by loved ones - and you have given them part of your strength to help them.  Hugs Nancy

Donna Faye's picture
Donna Faye
Posts: 430
Joined: Jan 2017

Had a bad night- am heading back to Hospice for comfort care only. Am stopping eating and drinking so maybe a week or more. It is amazing peaceful as we prepare to leave. All are ok with my wishes and I am so proud of how we are working so sweetly together.

Good night sweet ladies and may your days be filled with joy.

df

cmb's picture
cmb
Posts: 594
Joined: Jan 2018

I'll let Shakespeare say my closing words (with the appropriate gender replacement): "goodnight, sweet prince(ss)/and flights of angels sing thee to thy rest."

Fridays Child
Posts: 196
Joined: Jul 2019

May your journey be peaceful.  Thank you for all you've done for us here!

oldbeauty
Posts: 286
Joined: May 2012

Good bye, Donna Faye.  Thank you for sharing your journey, your wisdom and compassion.  You are grace personified.  You will live on here, as well as in our hearts.  Best wishes, Oldbeauty

EZLiving66's picture
EZLiving66
Posts: 1452
Joined: Oct 2015

Good night, dear Donna. We've never met in person however you are someone I wish I could. But, hopefully, we will meet again within the arms of the angels. You are truly one special lady.

Love,

Eldri

Tamlen's picture
Tamlen
Posts: 281
Joined: Jan 2018

Rest well. I am holding you close to my heart.

Kathy G.'s picture
Kathy G.
Posts: 219
Joined: Dec 2012

Donna Faye I will echo part of what Old Beauty said: you are grace personified...

How truly touching and humbling that you would come on here to let us know your time is close!

You are truly an angel. Fly high!

NoTimeForCancer's picture
NoTimeForCancer
Posts: 2841
Joined: Mar 2013

with a (selfish) tear in mind I say thank you and may you have comfort as you finish this journey brave warrior

Theskinnyscot's picture
Theskinnyscot
Posts: 29
Joined: Dec 2019

I having been trying to think of words to express how I feel about how I admire you and how sad I am that you are moving on. My daughter has a tattoo that says "we, as people, do not die unless forgotten". Therefor, you sweet lady, are immortal. 💔

Quilter_1's picture
Quilter_1
Posts: 95
Joined: Mar 2019

Donna Faye,  may God continue to bless on your journey.  I don't check in as often as I did during and shortly after treatment, so I was saddened to read your post this morning.  You have been a wonderful support to everyone here, thank you for that.   Your family sounds amazing and so loving and supportive.  I know that you will be fine, God is with you always.  

Linda

zsazsa1
Posts: 539
Joined: Oct 2018

Thank you, Donna Faye.  You've had inspiring words for me, been there with me on this board, and been a towering example of bravery, courage.  Such inspiration I've taken from you.  I am glad you have loving family with you to help you.  We will all miss you so, but your wise counsel to others will remain with us.

ConnieSW
Posts: 1538
Joined: Jun 2012

I will never forget you.

Armywife's picture
Armywife
Posts: 450
Joined: Feb 2018

I haven't been able to access the board for almost a month now, and my heart is broken that I missed the chance to say goodbye and thank you, Donna Faye - you know I love you, and I'm so sorry not to have been here to "see you off."  I pray you feel God's presence near. Much love and gratitude.  You have taught us all so much!

barnyardgal
Posts: 268
Joined: Oct 2017

Wishing you and your family peace and love. Godspeed and thank you for the wonderful inspiration you have given over the years. 

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