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The shrink backed off......

Butt's picture
Butt
Posts: 354
Joined: May 2018

I did start to look for a therapist about a year ago. I had 2 very dissapointing encounters with 2 guys. My oncologist told me that we don t have anyone in the area who specifically trained to work with people who have cancer. I found the 3rd one who seems ok. It happened after I returned from MD Anderson with a clear case PSTD. I saw him twice. The problem is not only PSTD but because I don t have any family support I have a very hard time to stay in a service and then I pay the price. Eg. When I was in Houston in November and they had a crazy schedule before a clinical trail that I failed, I was laying in bed, I noticed my socks were wet. I realized I haven t changed them because I was in a position of physical exatuitin. Debeloved a fungus infection that was fixed. So, there are many other examples when I literally have to pay the price. It was all massaged with the Shrink. I was supposed to see him on Tuesday. I wanted to confirm a night before and Ge is good with text. He said that he has a court hearing and we can t meet that day. I thought he simply messed up his schedule but didn t admit it and communicated that we never were scheduled for Tuesday. BS. I put it in my calendar in his office. Today he contacted me and said that he doesn't know how to help and there is no need to have other sessions. Clearmy, doesn't  know how to help. It is a guy number 3. Butt

Annabelle41415's picture
Annabelle41415
Posts: 6525
Joined: Feb 2009

I'm really surprised that there is no one out there that can help with people that deal with cancer diagnosis issues.  To me that is very sad as this is something that every community should offer.  It's sad that they have someone that can help every other cause in the world, but the people that really need support, like us on this board, are left no one that want's to help, or can't. 

Maybe you could as your hospital, or doctor, if they can recommend a support group or therapist for you.  My hospital offers a group specifically for their patients, however I've never attended as I've got a huge family of support.

In the meantime, maybe you can contact the ACS and see if they have any recommendations to groups in your area.

Kim

Trubrit's picture
Trubrit
Posts: 5193
Joined: Jan 2013

I too have been in a situation where I have been told 'No, you didn't have an appointment', and I've PLAYED BACK the taped recording of my call to them. Yeah, its what I do, and they get caught out. 

Instead of a shrink, why not try a Cancer support group.  Sometimes these professionals are full of it - often times not, but you certainly don't seem to be having any luck.   Ask at your local hospital. Go to your local Hospice.  You may find your help in a cirlce of like-minded people. Those who are struggling. Those whose prognosis are the same.  I bet you may also find people in such groups who have PTSD. I myself suffered such after the anesthetist bungled up during my C-Section and I had to birth my son without anesthetic. 

I wish you the best, as you move forward from here. 

Tru

Butt's picture
Butt
Posts: 354
Joined: May 2018

The local hospital has a support group once a month but it is for all cancer patients. a very few are young and I am at different point of life. I wanted the individual attention that takes into consideration my specific matters. I found strange that he couldn t admit that he as appears messed up his schedule. But when I texted for a new time twice he perforned a well known disappearance act. The issue is much bigger here. It is not about shrinks. It is about a person who was truly looking for help from multiple doctors. But no help. I was driven and motivated. I moved mountains. I felt a night before the last trip to MD Anderson and hurt my knee but I boarded an airplane instead of staying in bed with an ice pack. Just 2 weeks later when I got to FL based on their medical activities with a clear PSTD. I went straight to the war zone. They was told about PSTD. Only to have a late appointment leave me alone in a dark medical wing with a no clear idea how to get out. I was discovered in the corner completely horrified by I din t even know whom. I have a hard time to do life. It is very hard for me to stay on surface. I don t do any extras and basics to stay on a surface. I constantly have to navigate a medical logistics. I may not any more be capable to be my best health advocate. My primary retired. Today I went to establish a new one. She was out of the office.I saw a PA. She asked me why I think I have cancer because I don t look one. She either stared or giggled. I understand that she wasn t prepared fir this convo. She asked me:" Abd now you are going to hospice? Right?" I can t say was it a joke or not.............

Trubrit's picture
Trubrit
Posts: 5193
Joined: Jan 2013

Now, we all think hospice is for those last few weeks or months of our lives; when in fact it is for anyone struggling with the Cancer - or other debilitating diseases- and not just at the end.  

I bet you anything you would get quality care and guidance, at least for your PSTD.  While they may not have the training a phychiatrist has, you've already seemed to run the gauntlet there and found them wanting.  

I had a friend who went to visit Hospice for the support - not as a resident - over the last few years of his battle with Cancer and he found it very helpful, as did his wife.  I also have a friend who is a Hospice nurse, back home in England. 

Just ideas. You seem to be slipping down a very dark hole right now, and it is hard to be on the other end of a computer and not really be able to help. 

Tru

Butt's picture
Butt
Posts: 354
Joined: May 2018

We are planning to go  back on chemo next week and take another shot. I din t think my oncologist is ready to make a referral to hospice as of today. I also still work full time.  In reality since diagnosis it means about 15 hours per week with very flexible hours and no major responsibilities. More like if you can do something sometimes it is ok. 

zx10guy
Posts: 266
Joined: Dec 2013

Unfortunately, there is a crisis with mental health care in this country that few people are recognizing or even care about.  It's akin to the lack of attention CRC has been given because it's not so glamorous.  People don't enjoy talking about anus', rectums, and colons.

The good thing is more public figures are trying to remove the stigma around talking about mental health.  But talking is a far cry from doing something to fix the problem.  The issue is there are few and far between the number of mental health professionals needed to address everyone that needs such care.  Many times mental health professionals are overwhelmed with the number of current patients to the point that there are at least a month out waiting list for appointments or the practice is not accepting any new patients.  Add into the mix the insurance angle.  You'll have to find a mental health professional which will be covered by your insurance and if you do, you're back to seeing if they can see you some what soon or find out they are not accepting any new patients.  With the pool of resources so small, imagine the difficulty in finding someone who is good in this profession.

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