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Remembering Pinky

MAbound
Posts: 963
Joined: Jun 2016

It's kind of funny how different things happen to make me stop and think of those we've lost.

For LuAnn, it's every time I see Eldri's sock monkey.

News from Buffalo always makes me think of what happened to Lady Mox.

Brissance's Peppermint Patti avatar.

 

Today, all the snow from the storm just past has got me thinking of Pinky and how she said she and her husband had to sometimes shovel off the roof of their house during the winter. I'm remembering Pinky, but worrying about how her husband is managing without her. I'm hoping he's got family around to get him through what has to be a very tough holiday season.

I can't stop thinking about how Chris (Editgirl) just wanted to get it over with at the end. She was such a calming, serene person that it's hard to visualize her being so uncomfortable when she needed a chest tube at the end.

I didn't want Bobbi to stop posting...ever. Still need her.

I don't know what my point is. I guess I'm just missing so many people who came into and left my life and I needed to put it down. I was lucky to have been here while they were here, too. 

janaes
Posts: 793
Joined: May 2016

Ya know I appreciate your post. Its good to remember these wonderful friends

I have been thinking about beccatown because i remember how she finished treatment around christmas just after us. She left us so quick. It was so nice to have here as i went through treatments.

I will never forget cfris and Lou Ann sice they were the once who helped me along in treatment. Chris was one of the first th respond to me. 

Great people have blessed this site.

EZLiving66's picture
EZLiving66
Posts: 1383
Joined: Oct 2015

I know exactly what you mean. It's hard to explain to others outside this group when I talk about losing one of my good friends to this awful disease. Even though I've never met any of you in person, you're still my dear friends. Unless you've gone through this cancer hell, you can't really understand what it's like and how hard it hits when one of those friends are gone forever.  

Love 

Eldri 

Armywife's picture
Armywife
Posts: 354
Joined: Feb 2018

One of my friends is in Germany right now, and every time she posts on facebook, I think of Chris (Editgrl) going over there for the experimental treatments.  And I feel the same way as you, Eldri - you are the people I come to first when it comes to cancer.  We are a funny little family, aren't we?  Few of us have met in person - I recognized Linmk right away in the lobby at MD Anderson because of those big round eyeglasses.  We had the same doctor too, but she didn't know it.  I had hoped to meet Bobbi, but ran out of time.  I think of all of you - I count on seeing Abbycat's profile pic because she looks just like my favorite cousin.  I count on seeing Eldri write "Love, Eldri" at the end of her posts.  My husband laughs when I murmur out loud, "Oh, Cheese is doing better."  He laughs at our nicknames.  I count on Donna Faye's irrepressible spunk.  I chuckle at NoTime's Lady Parts poster.  I love OldBeauty's name and MABound's practicality and TakingControl's...well her taking control! (wish I could discipline myself to do all the things she has done to get the results she has gotten!)  I am in awe of cmb's skills and dedication.  I have loved watching the newer members come in here unsure of themselves and get through treatment like the bosses they - we - are.  So very thankful for all of you.

oldbeauty
Posts: 220
Joined: May 2012

It's that time of year, isn't it?  Cataloguing family news for those on your holiday card list; except our recollections are different. But just as meaningful.  These lovely ladies we've lost should not be forgotten.  Every woman who has found her way to this site must have been enriched for the discovery.  There is so much generosity and love here, as well as the solid, knowledgeable commentary and advice.  Thank you for sharing your rememberances, Armywife.  I like your name too!  Thank you for YOUR service to our nation; no less vital than your mate's.  I will tell you the story of my screen name.  I am no beauty queen like Cheese.  It is what my husband calls me.  It's from the book "How Green Was My Valley"  (read it or see the old movie with Greer Garson and Walter Pidgeon).  The patriarch of the coal miner family of several sons and one daughter calls his wife, affectionately, "Oldbeauty."  My hubby does not read much fiction but that is one of the handful he has read whose lyrical prose and heart-breaking story made an impression.  When we first met he was reading Hemingway.  In "For Whom the Bell Tolls," the American Lincoln Brigade fighter, Robert (Gary Cooper in the movie) called the young woman he fell in (doomed) love with "Little Rabbit" (Ingrid Bergman). That was his first pet name for me.  These are the things I like to think of as I make my way.  Best wishes, Oldbeauty.

Harmony09's picture
Harmony09
Posts: 77
Joined: Aug 2017

Thank you so much...so very much, for remembering and describing our friends as you did in this post. I don't get on as often as I think about doing so anymore, and I don't get to finish and post the responses I partially type out as I could when my youngest son was just over a year old. It is hard to believe my journey started then, and he is a little over 4 now. I haven't been sleeping well, and I haven't been in touch with my own feelings in quite a while as well. It is...or was quiet in the house, and you helped me to have a much needed, Really good cry, I made a couple of pretty big decisions, and I snorted when I laughed at myself in the end. I still "count on" y'all too, make silly associations, and feel the closeness that only We can understand. I could go on and on, yet I will close huge gratitude for every single person here.

Sincerely,

Stacey 

Armywife's picture
Armywife
Posts: 354
Joined: Feb 2018

Stacey, it's so good to see your beautiful face.  How are you?

MAbound
Posts: 963
Joined: Jun 2016

We are a funny little family. It really helps that we get each other. It just hits me sometimes how I've been here long enough to miss too many to list.

I really miss Becca, too. She was the one who gave me such a kick in the pants when I was trying to talk myself out of radiation. I think of her each time I feel someone needs to hear it straight instead of tied up with a bow, too.

As much as all these losses get to me sometimes, I think their examples have a greater impact in lifting me back up. People like LuAnn, Chris, Daylady, Bobbi and others who keep at it till the end are my heroines. They are our trailblazers and inspirers who keep hope alive that life can be lived and be worth it even while in the midst of a life-or-death battle. They've left us with experiences and wisdom we wouldn't otherwise have had. I'll always be grateful for what they have left of themselves here.

TeddyandBears_Mom's picture
TeddyandBears_Mom
Posts: 1584
Joined: Jun 2015

I agree MA! You said it so well.....

Love and Hugs to all,

Cindi

NoTimeForCancer's picture
NoTimeForCancer
Posts: 2675
Joined: Mar 2013

Thanks, MA.  You are not alone in your thoughts.  

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