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Question unrelated to cancer

airborne72's picture
airborne72
Posts: 252
Joined: Sep 2012

I have a question that is not related to cancer.  I am posting it here because of the exposure and on the off-chance that someone here may be an amputee or know someone who is.

Two weeks ago my 59 year old brother-in-law was standing inside a bank when a mentally unstable individual intentionally drove his vehicle into the building.  My BIL was runover (his right leg).  After a week of trying to save his leg at a local hospital, he was transferred to a much larger hospital.  One day after transfer his leg was amputated below the knee.  It is yet to be determined if more will need to be amputated.

I visited with him the other day and shared a few things with him.  He is not a talker and neither am I.  Fortunately, only he and I were in the room so our conversation was honest and from the heart. 

I told him about my experience over the past year with rectal cancer, chemo/radiation, surgery, chemo, and surgery and my first ever encounter with depression.  The purpose of that was to reassure him that even grown men can get depressed AND that there are things to do to counter it. 

He told me that earlier that day he was visited by two volunteer amputees who came to his room, unsolicited but with great sensitivity to his feelings, and shared their stories.  He said that at first he was very guarded and apprehensive, but then opened up and even cried.   He appreciated their visit and benefited from it.

I also shared with him the value of participating in a forum such as this one - where you can learn from others but also share with others.  I told him that unbeknownst to him there is somebody a few weeks behind him experiencing a similar tragic event and that person can benefit from his journey, and in that sharing he will begin to heal emotionally.  We are all together in this thing called Life.

Here's my question...does anyone know of a forum similar to this one that is dedicated to amputees?  I would like to be able to provide him specific forums and internet addresses so he can immediately get engaged to begin the process of emotional healing.

Jim

Ruthmomto4's picture
Ruthmomto4
Posts: 510
Joined: May 2013

thats horrible, I don’t know know any forums that can help him. I do know that my  Dad was an amputee, above the knee. He had many health issues and was able to get around a bit for a while with his prosthetic. However had it been below the knee he would have been able to do much better. I will pray he doesn’t need more surgery and his amputation stays below the knee. They will teach him how to walk again with a prosthetic in rehab, surprisingly it doesn’t take too long to heal enough to start the process. 

lizard44's picture
lizard44
Posts: 407
Joined: Apr 2015

The amputee coalition has a website that  lists  quite a few resources, including online  support  groups/forums: https://www.amputee-coalition.org/

I hope your  brother-in-law doesn't need    any further  amputation, that he recovers well, and is able to find the support that will be most useful  to him.

Grace/lizard44

Trubrit's picture
Trubrit
Posts: 4399
Joined: Jan 2013

I will keep your BiL in my prayers.  

May his recovery, physically and emotionally be fast. 

Tru

Annabelle41415's picture
Annabelle41415
Posts: 5665
Joined: Feb 2009

What a terrible experience to happen to him and he has to be just shocked it even happened.  It was a blessing that someone came to his aid and tried to comfort him.  The best answer about a site would be to ask those people that tried to comfort him in the hospital and also the hospital itself.  It's always good to have a support system and he possibly could use one after such a tragic accident.  My best regards to him.

Kim

Cindy225's picture
Cindy225
Posts: 172
Joined: Feb 2017

Jim -  What a terrible tragedy that your BIL and family are going through.  Keeping him and your family in my thoughts and prayers...

Cindy

airborne72's picture
airborne72
Posts: 252
Joined: Sep 2012

Thank you ladies for your responses and input.

Jim

BRHMichigan's picture
BRHMichigan
Posts: 367
Joined: Jul 2017

Jim, 

So sorry to hear this news. It must be especially tough to deal with the nature of the accident...that he was an innocent bystander. I hope and pray that he continues to receive support and encouragement.

Sincerely, --Beth

darcher's picture
darcher
Posts: 255
Joined: Jun 2017

  And here I was agonizing over my lot in life.  At least this doesn't show as much as that would.

Joan M's picture
Joan M
Posts: 275
Joined: Oct 2016

It is so unfortunate he had to experience such a loss due to deliberate actions of someone who has no regard for others.  We never think of these freak occurences when we go about our daily lives.   

I haven't heard of a forum either, but could there be one affiliated with a veterans organization, since many have experienced amputations?  

My cousin lost his leg last year after battling an infection for months. He had a difficult time learning to use his prosthetic.  It took nearly a year before he got comfortable with it.  He is 83 years old and most people would have given up, but after struggling for many months he is walking around more often and using his wheelchair less.

Hope your brother in law does well in his healing and mobility.

 

airborne72's picture
airborne72
Posts: 252
Joined: Sep 2012

Thank-you Joan.  I should have thought of the military medical services - DUH.

Jim

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