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HorseLvr's picture
HorseLvr
Posts: 102
Joined: Nov 2017

My u/s that was scheduled for the 5th was cancelled. Long story, I didn't cancel it but it was my fault. It would be almost a month to get in again, so I said no. The private clinics, which I was trying to get in to one, as it's a shorter walk from door to imaging room, is the same wait  time. I told my dr's asst that I cannot go through another month of high anxiety. She called me the next day and said the dr really wants me to get the u/s but if I absolutely refuse, he wants me to keep the appt I have for the 10th and go in to talk to him about "other ways to manage this", whatever that entails. I decided to go even tho I don't know how much good it will do. 

I had a long talk on FB with a cousin the other day. We lost touch decades ago, but reconnected a few years ago on FB. She really wants me to stick with the dr and do the tests and told me her father died of colon cancer because he would not go to the dr. So, now I have a guilt trip on me! :P

I'm thinking of calling the hospital in a nearby town (I live midway between this town and the city) to see if it's quicker to get in there, being a less populated area. My dr has privileges there and at one point, his asst had asked me if I could get there for the D&C, she said it would be faster to get in there than in the city. 

In the meantime, I have recently found out my bio mother (I was adopted) has had triple bypass, which is freaking me out. She seems to have passed  all her negative traits to me (chronic hand pain, diabetes, hypertension, weight issues etc) and I get them younger than she did. Why, oh, why, couldn't she have passed on her beautiful hair? Anyways, I have an appt with my PCP tomorrow and I'm going to ask about how to tell if you have clogged arteries and such (I was supposed to have a stress echo last spring but never went - see a pattern?) and ask about a mammogram. I think, but can't be sure, that she recommended it a few years ago and I said no. Might be time to do it.

saltycandy13
Posts: 167
Joined: Dec 2017

Hi!  I know all about the anxiety.  But I really think you have to at least do the D/C.  I have had 3 and they suck but that's the best way.  The ultrasound (transvaginal) I would assume, I;ve had tons of them, isn't the answer but the D/C will get the biopsy done at least.

Hang in there!  I am the Queen of anxiety.  I have hysterectomy in 2 weeks.  I'm a wreck.  But I take tranquilizers.  You might want to try something to just calm down.

I wish you the best!

Karen

MrsBerry
Posts: 102
Joined: Dec 2017

Cyberhugs to you HorseLvr. I second the suggestion to ask for some anti anxiety meds, they can be very helpful. I am sure your cousin does not intend to cause you guilt, she just wants you to take good care of yourself.

Please do not allow “perfect to be the enemy of the good.” I have to travel into a big city for my appointments and surgery, way out of my comfort zone, but it is what I need to do To fight this. 

Go see your doc, take a trusted loved one with you to help hear and understand. Have a list of questions and concerns written down...whatever information and obstacles need to be addressed to allow you to move forward on this. You can do this!

HorseLvr's picture
HorseLvr
Posts: 102
Joined: Nov 2017

I saw him yesterday and agreed to the u/s. My GP also wanted to do one as I was in to see her on Mon. and told her about an on again - off again problem of feeling like I have a full  bladder but either I don't pee much or if I do, it doesn't make that full feeling go away. The gyn isn't crazy about doing it in the small hospital in the town (says he's not familiar with the techs and the quality job they do) but we settled on doing it and if it's not good quality, repeating it in the city. He asked if I was still bleeding and I said I hadn't had any for about a month. He said that is a good sign - that cancer tends to bleed continuously, not stop and start. Does that sound right? He said  his office would call today, but they didn't. When I called the imaging dept on Monday, they said they were booking for next Wed. A lot faster than a 4 week wait in the city.

I expected to get ripped a new one at my appt. and in fact, said to him "you are probably pissed off at me". He said no, he's not pissed off and he repeated that at the end of the appt. I did apologize to him for all the trouble and he said there was no trouble. He's so nice, it's making me feel so bad about being so neurotic. 

I have other stuff coming up, too. An appt. next Wed with a physio dr to start the process to get another cortisone injection in my  knee. My GP is referring me for a mammogram, and I have dental on the 23rd. Just had a month's break from a bunch of appts, now starting again! 

evolo58
Posts: 293
Joined: Dec 2017

I'd be really, really cautious about that intermittent bleeding. That's what I had before I had ... this. My case was so peculiar that my PCP originally thougth I had kidney stones or a prolapsed bladder or uterus issue. 

MOST of the time, that gap between bleeding episodes is probably fine, but a couple of tests should better verify what is going on. Please be aware that I have been diagnosed with a Type 2 cancer. There aren't too many of us. My case is only a small per cent of total cancers. I am not sure how old you are or if you're in menopause. Intermittent bleeding within a year after your last period is normal. I have read of women who had bleeding a little after a year, and they were fine.

Also be aware that I have what must be one of the freakier cases of UPSC that I have ever read. I don't fit any factors for at least 95% of the women who have this disease, except for a suspicious CT scan with peritoneal and omental nodules. In fact, I often have the opposite symptoms and risk factors of UPSC (garden-variety). The CT scan was aprroved by my PCP to detect kidney stones (Those stones passed ... I really, really wish it WAS kidney stones now!), and even then, I think it's telling that my PCP thinks this is all very odd as well.  Not only is a UPSC diagonsis messing with my body, it's messing with my mind! I wouldn't be surprised if I wind up being one of those single uterine cases you read about in medical journals, or they open me up and find a bunch of tiny aliens in there or a Punch and Judy show. I am firmly of the opinion that the doctors ain't gonna know squat until they yank stuff out and biopsy it.

Bleeding could be a whole bunch of things. It's not necessrilty cancer. One problem, perhaps, is that we have a large group of Type 2s here because credible info about us is so frustrating to find. I wouldn't go entirely by the all the stories on this board. Please get that U/S and biopsy, at the very least.

HorseLvr's picture
HorseLvr
Posts: 102
Joined: Nov 2017

I'm so sorry for what you are going through and hope you get some answers soon. I can certainly understand  your frustration.

I'm 55 and was done menopause at 45. I can't remember exactly when I had my first spotting but it was at least a couple years after my last period. 4 years after, I had a 5 day bleed while in hospital for pneumonia. It was lighter than spotting but not heavy enough to be a period. Since then, I've had intermittent spotting and then in Oct. had a 3 day bleed that was like a light period and have had spotting here and there since then. It seems to be more frequent than it has ever been. Prior to Oct. I would go months,  sometimes many months between spotting episodes. I started keeping a log in Oct., I'm really kicking my butt for not starting one sooner. 

Apparently, I am high risk for endo ca, (no kids, overweight, diabetes, hypertension) but I'm really hoping it isn't. 

evolo58
Posts: 293
Joined: Dec 2017

If it's of any comfort, I've read of women whose bleeding started two years after their last period. It doesn't necssarily mean you have a problem. But I am not a doctor. Laughing

HorseLvr's picture
HorseLvr
Posts: 102
Joined: Nov 2017

The u/s has been scheduled for Jan. 25. 

HorseLvr's picture
HorseLvr
Posts: 102
Joined: Nov 2017

Had the mammogram today. Was not nearly as bad as I'd feared. One woman told me she passed out from the pain, so that made me on edge a bit, but it didn't hurt at all. Tomorrow is dental and it's pretty bad when a dental appt is your least dreaded one of the week!

The u/s is Thurs. and while I have been determined to go, a glitch has popped up. My transportation is paid for by my disability benefits and they are giving me grief about going to a different town, even though it's the same distance as the city (different direction) so the cab fare would be about the same. They now want a letter from the doctor saying that I have to go there because it's urgent and I can get in sooner than in the city. That's not the reason, I just *want* to go to get it over with and I do not want to ask my obgyn to lie so I can get it covered. ::sigh::

HorseLvr's picture
HorseLvr
Posts: 102
Joined: Nov 2017

Got my transportation issues sorted out and will be going tomorrow. This is going to take every ounce of willpower I can muster up because I'd really rather not go. However, given how good my dr has been with me and not ripped me a new one like I expected, and I talked him into allowing me to go to the other place, I don't want to back out as that wouldn't be fair to him.

evolo58
Posts: 293
Joined: Dec 2017

Glad you got it sorted out.

Again, please realize that bleeding does not necessarily mean cancer, and even if it is, that most uterine cancer is easily caught and dealt with in an early stage and grade. I didn't think the U/S was too bad. Hope you get techs who are soothing and gentle.

HorseLvr's picture
HorseLvr
Posts: 102
Joined: Nov 2017

Yes, but we always fear the worst, don't we? I tend to expect the worst, that way I'm usually pleasantly surprised when it's not as bad as I'd feared!

Northwoodsgirl
Posts: 526
Joined: Oct 2009

Glad you have your appointment tomorrow! We’ll be thinking of you and are praying for a good experience- not too much anxiety or discomfort. 

Lori

HorseLvr's picture
HorseLvr
Posts: 102
Joined: Nov 2017

I went through with it and it's over! I didn't get a good sleep, and when I finally dozed off and woke up, I was pretty anxious and wanting to cancel. But, I forced myself to get ready and strangely, as the time to leave neared, I settled down a lot. It went okay, there was one part where it hurt the way she turned the wand, but other than that it wasn't too bad. My bladder wasn't full enough for a good picture on the pelvic, but my obgyn is not concerned about that, he was after the internal part. The tech had a hard time getting good images, kept having to get me to move a bit and she ended up getting a 2nd tech to help her. I'm hoping the images she finally got are good enough for my doctor. 

JinVa's picture
JinVa
Posts: 29
Joined: Dec 2017

You deserve multiple helpings of whatever treat makes you happy. It's important not to ignore this so congrats to you for taking care of yourself!

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