I am retiring after cancer treatment.

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RobbT
RobbT Member Posts: 17 Member

I am 5 months out from treatment and a month NED after scan. I worked through treatment some days off. And the company was great. I feel I'm letting them down but I can't really do the job I used to do. I'll be 64 a week after I pull the plug. We will pay for cobra for a year and pray cancer is gone. I'm feeling like I'm admitting defeat. By pulling the plug. Any thoughts?

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  • rsp
    rsp Member Posts: 103 Member
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    Time to celebrate!

    RobbT

    My husband finished his treatment for base of tongue SCC HPV+ last December.  He worked for the first week of his treatment.  Then, he was feeling so bad, he stopped working and used up all of his sick leave.  After that, the company granted him 6 months of additional sick leave because he belonged to the sick leave bank.  That took him to his 6oth birthday (July).  He turned in his retirement papers and never looked back!  

    He is still struggling to eat many things, and lost a total of 90 lbs! (He did not have a feeding tube...). He has good and bad days, but he is here... and he is alive!  He was so happy he was able to retire.  I told him he has the rest of his life to look forward to.  That is what I would say to you!  I am sure you were a very hard worker and dedicated employee.  It is YOUR time!  You deserve to retire and ENJOY IT!

    Best of luck to you and everyone else who has fought the good fight!  Each one of you deserve to live a happy life.  

  • tommyodavey
    tommyodavey Member Posts: 727 Member
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    No Regrets

    Don't give it another thought and just do it.  Everyone I know who is retired is enjoying life.  You can always get a part time low paying job later if you want.  I retired at 57 and was diagnosed 3 months later.  Looking back, I wish I had stayed on due to the medical cost.  After treatment I worked at a similar job for almost a year but am still considered retired at 63. 

    Your life is only so long.  Go out and enjoy it if it's financially possible.  In my case it is.  My wife continues to work to keep me doing all the errands, etc., so she can just relax when she gets home.  Life is very good now at 5 years out from rads.

    Just do it.  No regrets.

  • CivilMatt
    CivilMatt Member Posts: 4,722 Member
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    Be VERY Happy

    RobbT,

    Congratulations on the NED!  Post cancer, work is a challenge for many who traveled this road.  You have nothing to feel bad about. Enjoy your retirement and enjoy your NED/

    Matt

    w

  • AnotherSurvivor
    AnotherSurvivor Member Posts: 383 Member
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    I have been 'retired' for

    I have been 'retired' for eight years, and couldn't go back.  Since then I have had a series of part-time/seasonal adventure jobs, currently work at a modest level as an earth sciences tech, did the entire series of financial planner certification courses, did yet another undergrad major (#3), plus another minor (also #3) on my ancient Business BS, and periodically pack up and travel about living in a small travel trailer or the shell on the back of my pickup.  There is no way I could possibly readapt to a conventional job. 

    That said, I know people that are absolutely miserable being retired, and if you feel that might be a result for you/your spouse recommend that it be avoided.  Cancer for me has been a not terribly subtle message that the time I have left is definitely finite.  In the end that time needs to be spent carefully.  The trick is that choice only makes sense to us individually, if it makes any sense at all.  As a person with little tendency to be 'conventional', I will argue there is nothing wrong with living a life that is conventional.  My wife and I had an absolutely standard Presbyterian wedding with very traditional vows.  In the 40 years since it has proven to be totally unique; no one does it that way anymore, so it turned out to be truly different.  I envy some of the scientists I know that have an actual life-work.  They've found something that they actually want to do for their whole life; I've never had that.  So far. 

    But, 'retirement' is not the end.  The US lives on volunteers.  Campgrounds, museums, hospitals, libraries, schools, recreation centers, animal shelters, et al, are all staffed with wonderfully interesting old people.  I am constantly bombarded by messages from +55 groups on Meetup that are headed off to: hike, paddle, climb, ski, sail, eat, dance, watch. In the face of so much activity sloth seems so much the unconventional path. I spent the day trimming tree limbs, drinking expresso,  and watching the year's crop of Northern Flickers try to figure out how to land on my suet feeders.  The young seem universally prone to ineptitude.  

  • Tonita
    Tonita Member Posts: 197 Member
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    You could take a leave under

    You could take a leave under FMLA if you really aren't sure about or ready for retirement.  I say, if you can financially manage, why not?  I had to retire at age 62 because I couldn't find another full time job.  Once you reach a certain age, that's it.  Companies won't hire you over a younger person.  I would still be working if it had been up to me.

  • phrannie51
    phrannie51 Member Posts: 4,716
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    I went back to work for a year....

    and decided to retire simply because I now knew that LIFE IS SHORT!! :)  That feeling of "I'm letting them down" comes from the good employee inside you....they'll be fine with it, and you will love being retired!!  (I sure have....I get to do whatever I want whenever I want).  Go for it!

    p

  • RobLee
    RobLee Member Posts: 269 Member
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    Hey Robb... Just Do It!

    Robb, my wife and I set our retirement timeline five years ago. We both recognized that we would be unable do our jobs for much longer and decided to invest half of our savings into a retirement home to take advantage of the low real estate prices following the recession.  Then it was a matter of renovating our old home for sale and our new home for occupancy. And wrapping things up at work. For me, this meant finding my own replacement, as I was pretty much a one man band. There were some sputters and false starts there, as it was difficult to find the right skillset.

    Things got hectic toward the end. It took several truckloads to relocate what we wanted to keep and lots and lots of decision making about what to do with most of the junk we had accumulated over the decades in our home. Then I got hit with the 'C' word right at the final phase of our move, and just within weeks of settling into our new home, my wife also got the bad news.

    2016 was one heck of a year. Next week we celebrate one full year here in Florida, and we have yet to have one full month without one of us undergoing treatment for something... with her chemo last spring and my radiation just completed last week. And now it appears that I may be joining your little group in the H&N forum, depending on the results of an MRI next week.

    Anyway, the one thing that my wife and I always keep in mind is that we are SO GLAD that we began planning and executing our retirement when we did, because it took every bit of time and effort we had just to get the pieces to fit together. And more than anything, we are so grateful that we did not have to drive to weekly infusions or daily radiation thru ice and snow. And we both recognize that if we had waited, that we certainly would not have had the energy to push forward with the move had we been faced with doing so after going thru our cancer treatments.

    Good luck going forward, Robb and best wishes for your retirement.. and be seeing you in the chatroom!

  • RobbT
    RobbT Member Posts: 17 Member
    edited October 2017 #9
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    RobLee said:

    Hey Robb... Just Do It!

    Robb, my wife and I set our retirement timeline five years ago. We both recognized that we would be unable do our jobs for much longer and decided to invest half of our savings into a retirement home to take advantage of the low real estate prices following the recession.  Then it was a matter of renovating our old home for sale and our new home for occupancy. And wrapping things up at work. For me, this meant finding my own replacement, as I was pretty much a one man band. There were some sputters and false starts there, as it was difficult to find the right skillset.

    Things got hectic toward the end. It took several truckloads to relocate what we wanted to keep and lots and lots of decision making about what to do with most of the junk we had accumulated over the decades in our home. Then I got hit with the 'C' word right at the final phase of our move, and just within weeks of settling into our new home, my wife also got the bad news.

    2016 was one heck of a year. Next week we celebrate one full year here in Florida, and we have yet to have one full month without one of us undergoing treatment for something... with her chemo last spring and my radiation just completed last week. And now it appears that I may be joining your little group in the H&N forum, depending on the results of an MRI next week.

    Anyway, the one thing that my wife and I always keep in mind is that we are SO GLAD that we began planning and executing our retirement when we did, because it took every bit of time and effort we had just to get the pieces to fit together. And more than anything, we are so grateful that we did not have to drive to weekly infusions or daily radiation thru ice and snow. And we both recognize that if we had waited, that we certainly would not have had the energy to push forward with the move had we been faced with doing so after going thru our cancer treatments.

    Good luck going forward, Robb and best wishes for your retirement.. and be seeing you in the chatroom!

    thanks

    Thanks for the support.  Good luck to you guys

  • Mavish
    Mavish Member Posts: 84 Member
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    Hi RobbT,
    Hi RobbT,
    I was 50, when I was diagnosed last year. I felt that I let my people down, as you did. I am going back to work soon. You may feel much better after a while, as cancer related fatigue improves. I think you should only think about, if you are ready to retire or not.
  • ManOfSteelMan
    ManOfSteelMan Member Posts: 13
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    I'm 56 right now and three

    I'm 56 right now and three years into battling this thing. I had to sell my home and car. Fortunately I had only one bill that I paid off with the amount I got from the house sale. I moved in with my daughter and we are talking about me retiring completely. I haven't worked in almost eleven months now since the company forced me to take leave. I get disability checks from the government as apparently they thought mine was serious enough that they bumped it ahead. I started getting checks about four months after I applied.

    She says she's fine with it after what I've been going through and with the recurrence happening so frequently, life is too short and I'm on my last straw now for treatment. If this doesn't work then it's just a matter of time. So comfort and do what I like to do and if I feel like sell what I make. Really though, it would hardly pay postage if I did but I would like to get something published simply for prosterity's sake.

    In any case, from one cancer patient to another, I think you did the right thing. This thing could recur and you'll miss the time you could have had to be with friends and family.