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Feeling rather anxious today

ImNotDeadYet's picture
ImNotDeadYet
Posts: 244
Joined: Apr 2017

I had a needle biopsy back in August for a lung nodule, which didn't show any signs of disease - though there was some concern that perhaps they didn't get the needle into the small nodule properly. I also developed a pneumothorax that kept me in the hospital for a week, and really threw me behind at work. But that's the least of my worries right now. Mid-September CT showed that the nodule has grown a few more millimeters (from 9 to about 12 or so), so my doc ordered a PET scan, which I had last week. My docu usually calls with results. However, today, the nurse called and said the doc wants to see me tomorrow or Wednesday. (I am going tomorrow afternoon.) She didn't say why, but I have a feeling the results weren't what we were hoping for. I understand that the PET scan 'lighting up' could mean a met, and could also mean some kind of infection (or something). I have to say I'm a bit blown away - not that I wasn't prepared for this possibility. It's not even a year since my nephrectomy, so I guess I was hoping for a little time to fully heal with nothing else to worry about. However, I guess that's not the plan. I'm feelling really anxious. Hoping all the work I have to do today will help keep my mind occupied, but it's hard to focus today. I know I'll get through this, and whatever it is, we'll fight it. Right now, however, I'm anything but calm. I just had to share this with you all - with people who really understand what it feels like to deal with this. I know I haven't been too active here, especially with all the playing catch-up from my week 'vacation' in the hospital. But I really appreciate this group, your collective wisdom, and the positive vibes that I feel when reading some of your posts and replies. I'm still not dead yet - and I don't plan to be anytime soon. Right now, I just need to get through today and tomorrow.

Thanks for listening.

Gary

 

love_of_my_life
Posts: 77
Joined: Jul 2012

Your anxiety is understandable.  I am hoping you have good results once you meet with your doctor.

Please let us know what you find out.  

Prayers for you.

Wehavenotimeatall
Posts: 489
Joined: Aug 2017

this

All I can offer is prayers and understanding of the fear you must be feeling.

You have been through a lot so I pray this is easily fixable and you will once again be the fabulous guy you sound like

Hugs to you and Your family

Angie1496's picture
Angie1496
Posts: 154
Joined: Sep 2017

Praying you get good news and your worries are not realized. 

APny's picture
APny
Posts: 1988
Joined: Mar 2014

Totally get your anxiety. No one wants to hear that the doctor wants to talk to you about your scans. What I really hate is why don't they just have you come in right away if they have something to discuss with you? How much time away from their busy schedule would that take? I really hate that they don't understand what waiting even a couple of days does to us. I'm so sorry you have to have this worry hanging over you. Keeping my fingers crossed that it's not bad news at all.

pamstayner's picture
pamstayner
Posts: 111
Joined: Apr 2014

hold it and exhale really slow.  Do it a couple of more times until you actually relax.  Today will pass by... 

You doctor wants to go over the scan with you. Can it be bad news, or good news? you will find out tomorrow afternoon. Nothing we can do about it, we physicaly cannot make time move faster.  Seems easy if they would just tell you the good news... and if it was easy, I think they would.

But here's what you can do.  Positive side... if your doctor tells you it is a suspected to be a lung met.  Ok, there is treatemt protocol that will be followed. Lots of paths to take. Opinions to seek.  Your life changes. But it is found, the met will be taken care of.  So will you.  This is way better than not knowing, the met grows and spreads and you never know until it is too late that is the negative side.

Another positive side:  Your Dr. wants to go over the scan in detail with you, as he knows you will worry, because you have been worring since the biopsy was a dud, and a I don't know if it is cancer or not because we did not get a good sample routine and now with the PET scan you will have a clearer picture about it.  

My thoughts will be about you all day tomorrow, please post results, and let all of us here ride along with you for awhile.

Pam

 

ImNotDeadYet's picture
ImNotDeadYet
Posts: 244
Joined: Apr 2017

I really appreicate your comments. The support and caring from this group means more than I can say right now. I'm feeling a little better, and am hoping my doctor will scold me for not making an appointment to see her when I scheduled the scan. (She may have asked me to do that, I honestly don't remember.) If not, we'll deal with it head on. Appointment is at 4:30 Mountain Time today, so I have a little time to wait. Hopefully work will keep me busy until then. Thanks again for the kind words!

ImNotDeadYet's picture
ImNotDeadYet
Posts: 244
Joined: Apr 2017

Saw the doc yesterday, and it was a case of her just wanting to review things in person. *Whew* The PET scan showed no signs of sugar uptake, and the nodule hasn't grown. So, we're back to regular monitoring (every 3 months) for now. There was some mild sugar uptake in the colon, but I can deal with my internist for that when I see him next month - no immediate urgency on that one. I'm feeling tremendously relieved and grateful! Thank you all again for the kind words of support. It really helped.

AnnissaP's picture
AnnissaP
Posts: 632
Joined: Sep 2017

Wonderful news!!!!!!

APny's picture
APny
Posts: 1988
Joined: Mar 2014

Relieved for you! That's very good news.

foroughsh's picture
foroughsh
Posts: 779
Joined: Oct 2014

It's wonderful news, I'm Very happy for you

pamstayner's picture
pamstayner
Posts: 111
Joined: Apr 2014

after waiting to hear/see your results.  Worry is a waste of time. Running in place, you don't move anywhere, but you get cardiovascular rewards.  Worring just starts grey hairs,  and gets no rewards... just waste of time.  Your mind races, runs several senarios, none of which you can predict to be the future until you get there.

So, you learned the scan-anxiety routine this time.  You did learn that your DR. likes to give results, good and bad in person.  Next time you should not be so anxious for bad news.

You will always be followed up. The every 3 months will become 4 then 6 then once a year.  Keep living life one scan at a time, and before you know it, you will have your new normal.

Best wishes, and be sure to spread your good karma to other newbies who will post here.

Pam

 

daisybud's picture
daisybud
Posts: 491
Joined: Jan 2016

I'm sure you feel so relieved! 

Kim

Angie1496's picture
Angie1496
Posts: 154
Joined: Sep 2017

Wonderful!  Sooo happy for you!

Jan4you's picture
Jan4you
Posts: 1326
Joined: Oct 2013

What I like is that you are man enough to come here for the rough, vulnerable times as well as the "good times."

Glad to know nothing has progressed...still...I don't know why the nurse couldn't have told you that when she called.

I also get the radiologist's reports ahead of time, do you? That way I can prepare myself and know exactly what I need to ask at the upcomign appointments. 

Sending you continued healing and calm~

Jan

ImNotDeadYet's picture
ImNotDeadYet
Posts: 244
Joined: Apr 2017

Thanks, Jan. I do get the pathology reports (and other lab results) through the online portal. But in the case of scans, I think the doctor can hold them until we speak. And I do understand that. She probably doesn't want patients misunderstanding the results without being there to explain them. 

Magayon
Posts: 16
Joined: Aug 2017

Gary,

our situation is similar. I just had a radical left nephrectomy Aug 18. The Ct scan prior to my surgery showed a 20mm nodule in my right lung. Six weeks after my surgery I had a follow up CT scan and the size of the nodule was unchanged. My medical oncologist referred me to pulmonary specialist for a bronchoscopy with biopsy. They decided to have the biopsy done because of the size of the nodule. The biopsy result was inconclusive so tomorrow I'm scheduled for a PET scan and I have an appointment with a thoracic surgeon on Friday. My case was discussed between my doctors and the thoracic surgeon thinks that the nodule is not renal carcinoma but suspicious of a primary lung cancer. I'm getting anxious because I'm still recovering from my nephrectomy and I might have another surgery so soon to remove the nodule.

I wish you luck.

Jan4you's picture
Jan4you
Posts: 1326
Joined: Oct 2013

Magayon,  I am so sorry you are going through all this unknown. 

Please realize I am here for you, all the way, if you would like that.

Sending you HOPE and guidance!

Hugs, Jan

ImNotDeadYet's picture
ImNotDeadYet
Posts: 244
Joined: Apr 2017

Magayon, 

Wow! Definitely some similarities. (I guess you can celebrate not getting a pneumothorax from the biopsy.) I hope everything everything goes well with the PET and thoracic surgeon. Keep us posted! 

hardo718's picture
hardo718
Posts: 853
Joined: Jan 2016

What a relief!

Prayers for Magayon!

Donna~

jeffstl34
Posts: 8
Joined: Sep 2017

Gary, knowing that you are going through the same thing did make me feel better.  Especially when I learned that your lesion had enlarged and it ended up not being what you thought.  I am so glad things turned out good for you.  I had my partial nephrectomy back in March on my left Kidney.  I know the RCC is back in that kidney.  I am fine with having to have surgery again, but they think it might have matastisized to by Liver.  I am going in on Friday to have the biopsy.  My emotions have been on a rollercoaster for the last three weeks.  Thank you for sharing your experience.

ImNotDeadYet's picture
ImNotDeadYet
Posts: 244
Joined: Apr 2017

Thanks for your comments, Jeff. I appreciate your support. 

I hope everything goes well for you tomorrow and that you have an easy recovery. You got this! 

 

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