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Urine, Faeces, blood and embarassment

Footstomper's picture
Footstomper
Posts: 1238
Joined: Dec 2014

Please dont apologize for talking about such things. Often this is the only place we can. We've all been through it. Waking up and peeing blood. Sitting in a room with everything covered in our own faeces. Many of us have been through it and all of us understand.

This is a horrible disease. We have all had a taste of its horrors. Please dont be embarrassed to talk about these subjects. At the very least we can sympathise and empathise. No one will be offended

 

Abunai's picture
Abunai
Posts: 173
Joined: Oct 2016

Glad to have people here who understand these things.

Even more glad to be married, for more than 27 years, to a strong woman who apparently took "for better or for worse" at face value.

Thanks for this post, Footstomper.

Footstomper's picture
Footstomper
Posts: 1238
Joined: Dec 2014

"Even more glad to be married, for more than 27 years, to a strong woman who apparently took "for better or for worse" at face value."

That is, of course, the secret weapon. Ive been married for 31 years who takes no nonsense from my lumps or myself, or my medical team

todd121's picture
todd121
Posts: 1425
Joined: Dec 2012

I hope this is a place where we can talk about these issues. All of them.

Todd

mrou50
Posts: 389
Joined: Mar 2013

I just worry I would offend some readers when I mention those issues, but you are right all of us experience them.

Mark

LauraM3's picture
LauraM3
Posts: 27
Joined: Apr 2016

this is a nasty disease

Allochka's picture
Allochka
Posts: 887
Joined: Nov 2014

I'm sure this is the place to talk about these. We are friends here, drawn together by mutual horrid disease (both patients and caregivers).

and you do not usually feel embarassed when a friend holds your hair if you throw up, or similar.  Same here - no need to be ashamed in front of friends...

foxhd's picture
foxhd
Posts: 3183
Joined: Oct 2011

little old man is newly adjusting to the nursing home. The nurses sit him up in front by the nurses station to keep an eye on their new patient. After a little while he starts leaning over to the left. An alert nurse sees this and props him back up with a pillow. A short time later the nurse sees the old gent leaning way over to his right. She stuffs another pillow on his side and has him sitting up nice and straight. Just then the old fellows family comes along and asks him how everyone is treating him. He says that everyone is very nice but they never let an old guy fart.

angec's picture
angec
Posts: 924
Joined: Mar 2012

Too funny, Fox!  Glad to see you up to old tricks again.  Hope all is well.

foxhd's picture
foxhd
Posts: 3183
Joined: Oct 2011

developes a friendship with this sweet little old lady. Every afternoon they could be seen sitting together by the window. The little lady would reach under his lap blanket and put a cute little smile on his face. This went on for quite a while until one afternoon when the sweet little old lady came by for her visit. And there was another woman sitting there in her place with her hand under his blanket. Taken back, the woman demanded, "What's she have that I don't have?" He looked her in the eye and said, "Parkinsons."

Steve.Adam's picture
Steve.Adam
Posts: 460
Joined: Oct 2016

Thanks :-)

stub1969's picture
stub1969
Posts: 815
Joined: Jul 2016

Fox--those will be retold several times with beer and friends.  Thanks!!

Stub

Allochka's picture
Allochka
Posts: 887
Joined: Nov 2014

:-) :-) :-) hillarious!!!

APny's picture
APny
Posts: 1965
Joined: Mar 2014

OMG, Fox, hilarious!

foxhd's picture
foxhd
Posts: 3183
Joined: Oct 2011

actually leaned side to side when reading the first joke? I know you did.

Coldbiker's picture
Coldbiker
Posts: 22
Joined: Jan 2016

Haven't been on for awhile thanks for the laugh... 

Footstomper's picture
Footstomper
Posts: 1238
Joined: Dec 2014

Is it possible you are evil?

I'm still leaning for the fart that will not come

rhominator's picture
rhominator
Posts: 233
Joined: Nov 2015

What happens if you're "scared half-to-death" twice?

Footstomper's picture
Footstomper
Posts: 1238
Joined: Dec 2014

Scared half-to-death: Your new life is now half your previous life

Scared half-to-death II: Your new life is now half your previous life (e.g. 75% of when you started)

Scared half-to-death III: Your new life is now half your previous life (II)

Scared half-to-death IV: Your new life is now half your previous life (III)

Scared half-to-death V:  Your new life is now half your previous life (IV)

So, no matter how many times you get scared half to death, your still only half way to death.

It is logically impossible for you to die.

Philosophy is an excellent subject to study

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