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Dad just diagnosed

tiffany2015
Posts: 17
Joined: Jun 2015

Hello,

My father is 57 and was just diagnosed with stage 4 prostate cancer.  Gleason score is 10.  It has spread to lymph nodes and liver already.  He is going for a bone scan today to see if in his bones and a chest CT.  We have met with oncologist tomorrow for the results. The oncologist has already stated she recommends chemo and hormone therapy.  I am completely frightened and devastated.  My dad is being so strong with his results.  Any advice or well just anything would be helpful.   My thoughts are with everyone on here. 

hopeful and opt...
Posts: 2226
Joined: Apr 2009

Dear Tifany,

I am sorry for your Father's diagnosis.

Please find a previous thread that you can review for information. This will be a good start.

http://csn.cancer.org/node/289172

This is treatable, however things must be done in a coordinated fashion with excellence.

Please feel free to ask specific questions.

We are here for you.

Best,

H & O

 

Swingshiftworker
Posts: 1013
Joined: Mar 2010

Tiffany:  Just wanted to note that the lack of responses here does not mean that the men here are not concerned and sympathetic to your father's situation.

We are definitely concerned but most of us here have only had low grade Pca -- Gleason 6 or 7 --which is treatable by a variety of methods leading to relatively long term surviival rates.  Severe cases of Pca -- especially Gleason 9 or above -- which involve the spread of the cancer to other organs (Stage 4) is a whole different matter that most of us are not capable of commenting on based on our experience.  Those with such experience frankly are not long lived and often are not capable of (or interested in) posting their experiences on a forum like this; wives and family members like you are the people we most often hear from about such men.

I don't mean to be insensitive but, while the possibility of a long term cure for his cancer is not impossible, the probability of a long term cure is remote and you (and your family) need to prepare for that likelihood.  The National Cancer Institute estimates the median survival rate for men w/PCa that has spread beyond the prostate at only 1-3 years.  See: http://www.cancer.gov/types/prostate/hp/prostate-treatment-pdq. 

So, personally, I think your family's best course of action is to give your father as much comfort and support as possible while he attempts to fight this disease and to give your father the best info available regarding the suggested treatments and medications based on his circumstances. 

Hormone treatment is not a cure; it is a palliative that is designed to reduce the production of testosterone in order to reduce the growth of PCa but the cancer can still develop despite this treatment.  Chemotherapy is a "hail mary" approach to killing the cancer that has left the prostate and spread throughout the body with no specific point of focus.  While chemo can be effective the side effects can be horrific and may people choose to stop or refuse chemotherapy because of this. 

You do not mention radiation treatment.  Not sure if it would be effective in your father's case but, if there's a belief that his prostate is still actively producing cancer cells which are being spread to other parts of the body, PERHAPS killing those cells in the prostate with radiation may alleviate the spread of the cancer elsewhere.  Radiation directed at other body parts where the cancer has concentrated would be another possibility that you might discuss w/your father's oncologist.

Best wishes to your father from us all here on this forum.

 

 

Max Former Hodgkins Stage 3's picture
Max Former Hodg...
Posts: 3311
Joined: May 2012

Tiffany,

If he had not written it already, I would have said most of what Swingshiftworker wrote above.

But, I am not sure I would have written at all. Your father's situation is a very bad one, and people often do not know what to say in such circumstances, and therefore often say nothing.

It is both terrible and unusual that a man so young as him discovers PCa so late.  All curative therapies are pitched at earlier-stage disease, which is when it is usually caught.

His doc will no doubt propose some forms of therapy, but in blunt honesty, the outlook must be bleak, given the specifics you provided.  I watched two friends pass of PCa in the last few years, and have some indirect familarity with chemo and the post-chemo drugs now available for end-stage prostate cancer.  Most specify that they add months, not years.

Please do write further; I hope it might be of some comfort or assitance to you, despite the bad news you have gotten thus far.

max

 

VascodaGama's picture
VascodaGama
Posts: 3033
Joined: Nov 2010

Dear Tiffany,

Welcome to the board.

I am sorry for you, your dad and the family. We all surfer when a member is caught with cancer. Anxiety is friend of the enemy. Try to be positive when talking about the matter in front of him.

I would like to know details about your dad’s diagnosis. How have they found cancer in the liver?

Was there any biopsy of samples taken in the liver or was the cancer diagnosed via an image study?

The best exam to identify and locate the cancer in the whole body is through PET scans using specific contrast agents proper to identify prostatic cancer. Gleason 10 is the highest prune for spreading but maybe still confined to areas possible for being eradicated.

Can you tell us more of his histology with the disease, when did he start having symptoms? How high has been the PSA?

Can you share information regarding his liver function tests such as; ALT, AST, ALP, Albumin, and GGT. All this data surely is at hand and may have been obtained from the blood sample used for the PSA test.

We have read the stories of patients with similar status as those of your father. Chemo did work in some guys in particular with liver problems. I do not know how far the treatment did extended their lives over long periods (above 10 years) but some guys had improved situations and enjoyed life. Your dad is very young and he should try the combination treatment proposed by his physician.

Nutrition is important chemo therapies. You could help him providing information in regards to diet. Please make a copy from this link;
http://cancer.ucsf.edu/_docs/crc/nutrition_prostate.pdf

The family should provide him with the best comfort, probably an outing or travelling with allow time to settle down things.

Best wishes for tomorrow’s appointment.

VGama

hopeful and opt...
Posts: 2226
Joined: Apr 2009

There is a difference of survival among men with advanced disease. I know several who are living several years. There are many  new high tech drugs, diagnostic tests and procedures that are now available to fight this bandit.

Dear Tiffany, I truly believe that your Father will survive with proper medical treatment. 

Best

BE HOPEFUL & OPTIMISTIC

tiffany2015
Posts: 17
Joined: Jun 2015

Thank you all for your advice, words of encouragement and just knowing that you all are here and have went through is a comfort knowing that I can speak to this group. 

I know some asked about how he was diagnosed and treatment etc.  He was having pain about 2 months ago peeing and due to his insurance it wasnt until June 1st that they sent him for a prostate biopsy.  The day after his biopsy he was really sick and just hurting all over so his urologist sent him to hospital because he thought infection.  It was during his stay that they did a cat scan and saw all the areas.  After discussing with radiologist, gastroentrologist, medical doctor and oncologist he was confirmed to have stage 4 prostate cancer that metastisized to his liver (confirmed by biopsy) and to his lymph nodes (also confirmed by biospy).  Friday after receiving the news they then wanted a chest cat scan and a bone scan.  Today we got the results and was informed that the cancer has spread to his lungs, chest lymph nodes and now his spine (specifically the area around the L5).  His PSA score has never went above 90.  There were no other indicators.  They are starting Chemotherapy next Tuesday and will also be doing hormone therapy.  He will be doing chemo every three weeks and they will be using Docetaxel (Taxotere). 

I try so hard to be strong for him and not let my emotions get the best of me but it is sometimes too hard.  My son (his grandson) who is 7 has so many questions.  All he knows is that his papaw is really sick and when asks if God is going to let him die I have no idea what to say.  My dad is a fighter and is so strong and I keep telling myself he can beat this but the facts suggest otherwise.  My brother and I are just so lost and confused because one minute we have to worry about just prostate cancer to now worrying about if he will make it through this.  I really appreciate everyones support, encouraging words and willingness to help me through this on this board.  God bless each one of you! 

Swingshiftworker
Posts: 1013
Joined: Mar 2010

My heart goes out to you, your family and, of course, your father.

The rapid spread of this cancer from his prostate, to his lymph notes, to his liver, to his lungs and now to his spine indicates a VERY, VERY aggressive cancer.  You need to keep your emotional strength up to support your father and your family, but I think you know how this will probably end.  The only question is how and when. 

If you are not familiar w/the chemotherapy drug, Docetaxel, here is a link to a pretty good summary of how it is used and its side effects on a patient: http://www.macmillan.org.uk/Cancerinformation/Cancertreatment/Treatmenttypes/Chemotherapy/Individualdrugs/Docetaxel.aspx.  The list of side effects is extensive and far from pleasant.

I am pragmatic and I am not a religious person.  So, forgive me if I'm blunt but you need to take steps now to prepare yourself and your family for what will likely happen, including getting your father's financial and other affairs in order.  Doing those things hopefully will provide you w/a distraction from watching your father deteriorate. You should also take time AWAY from tending to your father and his affairs every now and then.  Otherwise, you will end up an emotional wreck. 

If you are religious, arrange a counseling session w/your priest or minister if you think it would be worthwhile.  Also try to get some of your other family members to do some of the "heavy" lifting.  Sounds like you are taking on the primary responsibilty for your father's care and, if there are other family members who can help, you should ask them to do so, so that you do not have to take on the burden alone.

Just keep in mind that such things are a part of life and try to recall all of the fond memories that you and your father have shared together to keep your morale up.

Good luck and best wishes!

 

 

tiffany2015
Posts: 17
Joined: Jun 2015

Thank you for responding @swingshiftworker, @vascodaGam and hopeful and optimistic

Yes the cancer he has is very aggressive.  His doctor told us that when someone his age gets prostate cancer it tends to be very aggressive and it is definitely proving that us.  I am slowly triyng to accept the outcome of what I know will be and it is very difficult.  I ask myself daily how do I prepare and the only thing I can come to is that as long as my dad is peaceful and Ok with what happens then I need to be too, as much as I can.  Thank you Swingshiftworker for providing the link on the side effects of the chemo they have him on.  They went over a few of them but not all.  While speaking with my dad last night he thought that his cancer was curable, and the doctor actually informed him that it was not.  They will try to control it but thats all the can do.  I hated and it killed me to be one to tell him that his cancer is in fact not curable.  I know that with all the information we are receiving things get misconstrued or forgotten and I am sure I will have to remind him of things as we go down this road. 

The good thing is is that we have executed a living will, working on Power of Attorney and he has informed me of his wishes should the time come for that.  We are slowly gettings in order in case the worse case scenario happens. My  brother tries to help but he is very much in denial and my fathers girlfriend only helps when it is convenient for her.  I dont mind doing what I need to I am just trying to keep it from taking a toll on me and still raise my son without interruption in his life. 

Someone mentioned that I must be young due to my dads age and in my eyes I am.  I am 31 and my brother is 34 and as I informed my brother he needs to go ahead and go to a urologist to have his baseline and ensure that everything is ok.  They are going to be doing genetic counseling with us and we were informed that prostate cancer and breast cancer has a direct correlation.  My dads mother died of breast cancer when she was 45 so I guess that makes it even that more important for my brother and myself to keep an eye on things. 

Max Former Hodgkins Stage 3's picture
Max Former Hodg...
Posts: 3311
Joined: May 2012

Tiffany,

There does seem to be some general link in prostate cancer discovered in younger men and aggressiveness. My brother-in-law was diagnosed a few years ago in his 40s, and despite treatment at MD Anderson, it took him.  The great American singer Dan Fogelberg died of it a few years ago, at the age of 56. And yet many older guys live with the disease for twenty years or more, virtually symptom-free.

 

Swingshift mentioned the chemo drug taxotere; here is another link to it, if you are interested in reading.  I know that the responses to you have been blunt, but it is of course possible that your father has some quality time remaining.  I did hospice and then was Executor for both of my partents and their estates in recent years; you having a Will, power-of-attorney, and medical directives will make things much easier than they otherwise usually are.

A cousin recently tested "BRCA 1" positive, and following the actress Angilina Jolee, had both breasts removed as a preventative. BRCA 1 officially gives a 65% liklihood of aggressive breast cancer, but other studies quoted in the articles following Jolee's surgery put the number as high as 87%. Taxotere is also the most common drug given to triple negative (Hormonally resistant) breast cancer patients.

http://chemocare.com/chemotherapy/drug-info/Taxotere.aspx

I did a six-month-long chemo combination therapy of five chemo drugs years ago.  If your dad is offered an IV port, I strongly recommend that he get one.  Installation is a thrity minute, easy surgery.  Chemo can scald the small veins if spilled, and constantly getting needles is unpleasant for most patients. I am wishing the both of you better news than might be reasonably expected,

 

.

CC52
Posts: 103
Joined: Nov 2013

Tiffany,

You have come to a great place, and some of the wonderful members of this forum have already shed light and insight to your darkness. There is so much for your father and your family to consider, I have no doubt it's all overwhelming. I cannot begin to match the knowledge and experiences of the participating members here, so I will simply offer my prayers for peace and healing to your father and all who love and care about him. 

CC

hunter49
Posts: 210
Joined: Oct 2011

Hi Tiffany sorry for your dad's diagnosis.  I anm curious do you know if the biopsy is adenocell or small cell.  It can make a huge difference.  I would contatc Johns Hopkins they have a lot of amazing trials and are getting decent results with traditional therapy and vaccines.  some patients diagnosed stage 4 are in 3rd year of the study.  Good luck.

 

VascodaGama's picture
VascodaGama
Posts: 3033
Joined: Nov 2010

Tiffany

I am sorry to know about the extensive spread of the cancer. Swing said it all. I think it aggressive and difficult to treat. His physicians will provide what is best available and will try to manage the pain along the treatment but the wide spread and the side effects from the medications may turn the situation unbearable in particular when your dad is suffering already with pain and discomfort.

It is difficult to accept but this is time to consider the worse. The whole family should know about the matter and be involved. I know you are trying your best too. You need to realize that cure may be impossible so that you may focus your efforts by providing him with what he likes best and extending his quality of living. Anemia is a bad scenario in advanced PCa patients. Read about ways to fight it.

From the age of your father, I presume that you and your brother are young and know little about this cancer but you should consider any hereditary situation running in the family. Be cautious.

You and your family are in my thoughts.

VG

hopeful and opt...
Posts: 2226
Joined: Apr 2009

Family members of prostate cancer patients are more likely to develop prostate cancer than the rest of the population; so please notify other family members, uncles and even cousins. Generally it is best to have a PSA test at around 35 for a benchmark, and then regular testing ; PSA, Digital Rectal Exam, etc. starting at age 40. Early detection of the disease is better treated.

Eat Heart Healthy; heart healthy is prostate healthy. 

 

About 7 year ago there was a study at Albert Einstein, done among Askenszi Jews that showed a correlation between prostate cancer and breast cancer, so you and your sisters, aunts get your mamograms, and also eat heart healthy.

harmsgal49
Posts: 1
Joined: Jun 2015

My father age 74 was diagnosed with prostate cancer this past Wednesday.  He was told the following:  1 out of 14 core samples showed 15%, the rest of the samples were negative.  I asked my father if he was told anything about a gleason score and he said no.  His PSA level prior to the biopsy was 13.  He was told Wednesday that the cancer is slow moving and completely treatable.  He will have a MRI done followed by a consultation in regards to treatment options.  I guess the idea of the MRI has me pretty nervous because it means more waiting for results which I have a terrible time dealing with.  My father on the other hand is very upbeat and optimistic.  He has experienced no symptoms  and believes what the doctors have said in regards to knocking this cancer out.  I guess I am on this board looking for some positive reinforcement.

Swingshiftworker
Posts: 1013
Joined: Mar 2010

Harmsgal49: You should start a new thread for a discussion of your father's PCa rather than tag it onto the end of this one.

hopeful and opt...
Posts: 2226
Joined: Apr 2009

Harmsgal,

You can start a new thread by going to the previous screen, click " post new forum topic" which is directly beneath "prostate cancer" which is on the top left side of the screen.

By doing this, the current thread will not be degraded, we all can access your thread in the future, and all of us will have the oportunity to comment about your case.

Best,

H

VascodaGama's picture
VascodaGama
Posts: 3033
Joined: Nov 2010

Harmsgal49

I sense anxiety in your post but from the few info you got in hand regarding the diagnosis nothing is indicative of an aggressive form of cancer. In fact one positive sample out of 14 is not voluminous and it could relate to a sort of indolent cancer that would not bother the well living of your father, for the rest of his life.

PSA 13 is high but it could relate to added conditions from a case of hyperplasia (BPH). The Gleason pattern and score is missing and you should call his doctor’s office to get the exact number. You can also request for a copy of the pathologist report where they described what they found in the biopsy, including any indication of existing BPH.

The MRI may provide more clues on the extent of the cancer. With such image study the urologist will provide your dad’s clinical stage. However, the need for a treatment should be carefully judged because of the age of your father and his loss of quality of life that a therapy may cause.

You do not like waiting (“…I have a terrible time dealing with…”) but you should not rush into a decision without proper details of the real status of your father. Do things timely and coordinately and with knowledge.

Being a son of a PCa patient makes us at higher risk of being positive to cancer. I would suggest you to be cautious and get checked.

Best wishes.

VGama

Rakendra's picture
Rakendra
Posts: 198
Joined: Apr 2013

No one can really give sure advice.  One can only give opinion and personal experience.  Mine is that in this case (NOT harmsgal), I would not accept any treatment until i personally investigated all the side effects, what per cent of patients are helped, what per cent of patiens are killed by the treatment, and every aspect of treatment.  Treatment with these highly toxic, unproven, and expensive drugs is chancey at best in your father's situation.  Sure, some are going to be helped, but many others are going to suffer horrible side effects and possibly have curtailed life.  And if the severe pain starts extended life is not going to be an asset.  Whether help or not, these drugs WILL decrease quality of life, but are sold on the basis of (maybe false) hope of a cure or life extension.  Sure, there maybe some who are very much helped, but the many more who suffer and die are not here to refute the success stories.

   My experience having very advanced stage 4 bone matatstases is to do nothing with the doctors but a lot with diet, meditation, exercise, and spiritual inner work.  I am not looking at or for the future.  My goal is to make every second, every minute, every day full of gratitude for all I have been given and to spend as much quality time as possible not only with my loved ones, but also with all my brothers and sisters in the Family of Man.  I live totally in the moment  and totally in the love space.  My suggestion is to not be much concerned with doing things which may be negative and only add false hope and suffering,  but, rather than doing, concentrate on being - being in the moment, being in the love space, being in harmony with nature and loved ones and being grateful for all that is happening, even if you do not like it.  love, Rakendra

tiffany2015
Posts: 17
Joined: Jun 2015

Thank you so much Rakendra for sharing your story and experiences.  I have tried to show my dad all the results and research I found regarding chemo and hormone therapy but he feels that if he doesnt do chemo he is giving up and I cannot make him see otherwise.  So at this point I am just trying my best to respect his wishes and live in the moment.  At this point we are three rounds in with fourth round coming up and the three weeks in between each chemo session I see his health deteriorate.  He only has about 5 good days and then he starts chemo again. 

VascodaGama's picture
VascodaGama
Posts: 3033
Joined: Nov 2010

Rakendra

Thanks for participating. I was hoping that you come along and share a comment to Tiffany’s family. I hope she understands your words. However, she is trying to live the moment, be in harmony with the loved ones but not grateful for all that is happening.
This is a stressful moment and difficult for the family to understand spiritual stances. They can hope for an improvement or let things occur naturally. In the long term his quality of living is the prime objective and we all respect her father’s choice and priorities.

Your posts always impress me

Tiffany may want to read this; http://csn.cancer.org/node/263139

Best,

VG

 

stoniphi's picture
stoniphi
Posts: 54
Joined: Mar 2015

...Being "here, now" or "mindful living" or "living in the moment" is of paramount importance. That gives us quality of life and that is very important indeed.

monica302009
Posts: 3
Joined: Jul 2015

Tiffany... my dad was 53. Gleason score 10 stage 4 pc. Psa 198.... when we found it the cancer was already in all bones knees up. Spinel fluid and bone marrow. I would like to chat more with you. Offer some advice. I miss my dad everyday. Will be a year in august. 

tiffany2015
Posts: 17
Joined: Jun 2015

Hi Monica302009,   I would love to chat more with you and receive and advice you can give.  I am sooo sorry for the loss of your dad.  I cant imagine but unfortunately it is something I am afraid I will have to endure.  My prayers and thoughts are with you!

flyerette65
Posts: 65
Joined: Oct 2014

My estranged spouse was recently diagnosed with prostate cancer.  He does not know Gleason or PSA scores he said his daughter knows all of that.  His daughter had told me that the tumor was well contained and that "they got it all" but then said something about possible liver involvement. She referred to the tumor as a "goombah".Of course I am very concerned but I am especially concerned because of his lackadasical attitude towards his cancer and potential treatment. And I am concerned because his daughter (we both have adult "children" from a prior marriage), may not have enough knowledge to ask the correct questions.

I am a cancer survivor myself. I know that you have to be your own advocate and if a doctor's recommendation doesn't resonate with you then demand another scan, biopsy, whatever.  The radiologist I saw after my chemo treatment ended tried to tell me that a lympocele was unresolved cancer and that I would need 35 external and 3-5 internal radiation treatments.  I demanded a PET scan which showed NED so I declined the radiation.  If I had been a "good little girl" I would have gone ahead with treatment I didn't need.   My husband's attitude that his daughter will take care of everything worries me because he needs to participate in any treatment decisions that may need to be made and I'm afraid his "why do I need to know" attitude might get him into a treatment that he neither needs or wants.  Knowledge is power! I was diagnosed with USPC in May, 2011, which is a rare, aggressive type of endometrial cancer.  My oncologist told me that only 10-12% of women diagnosed with endometrial cancer get USPC. I've had problems in the past year but so far so good.  Since we are still legally married but separated I wonder if I would be out of line in asking to accompany him to his post op appointment.  We are speaking and are talking about a possible reconciliation and went out to dinner before his surgery.  I don't consider us "old", although we are both in our late sixties.  Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you all.

Old Salt
Posts: 720
Joined: Aug 2014

Your situation is complex and warrants its own thread to prevent confusion.

Thanks!

Max Former Hodgkins Stage 3's picture
Max Former Hodg...
Posts: 3311
Joined: May 2012

 

Unless you get the clinical specifics of your ex's biopsy and treatment(s), there is next to nothing of insight that the guys here can contribute toward understanding his situation. 

For instance, the statements "they got it all" but "possibly has liver involvement" do not logically go together at all regarding prostate cancer.

max

flyerette65
Posts: 65
Joined: Oct 2014

Thanks Max. I know from my own experience how important pathology reports, staging and grading are. I can't believe that the ex would be "playing ostrich" by sticking his head in the sand and not being at all concerned about his disease.  I will start a new thread. And good luck to all of you. 

Tiffany you have my prayers and thoughts for your dad.  He is very lucky to have you!

 

tiffany2015
Posts: 17
Joined: Jun 2015

Thank you flyerette65! 

tiffany2015
Posts: 17
Joined: Jun 2015

Hi all, I am sorry I havent responded lately. I truly appreciate everyone taking the time to provide insight, words of encouragement, advice and just being someone to go through this unfortunate journey with.  I pretty much just took time away from the internet and been spending alot of quality time with my dad and family.  My father is getting ready to start his 4th round of taxotere next Tuesday.  I am actually taking him for scans on Friday to see what is going on with the cancer.  We will get the results on Tuesday before his chemo begins.  I have went through every stage imaginable during this process with my dad.  My dad seems to be ok with what he is dealing with and still has continued to keep an upbeat spirit, while i tend to be angry with the whole situation.  But I do not reflect my unhappiness of him having to go through this to him.  The chemo has really just beat him up.  He was always this big strong man that worked in construction and would work from sun up to sun down.  Since being on this chemo I have seen him go from that man to a fraile, out of breath, sick man.  It literally breaks my heart.  We have had to discuss death in very candid conversations.  My grandmother (dads mom) died from breast cancer several several years ago and he told me that as he watched his mother go through chemo he told himself he would not if he got cancer.  Well here we are and hes going through it.  I once asked him why he chose to do chemo and he told me because of his kids and grandchildren.  He said he feels like if he doesnt do it then hes giving up.  The selfish part of me wants him to do it whatever it takes to keep him here, but the unselfish part of me told him that if he couldnt go through chemo anymore that I would understand and would know he fought like hell to overcome this.  I am rambling at this part I am sure so I will let you all go.  I hope that each of you are having a wonderful day!

flyerette65
Posts: 65
Joined: Oct 2014

Tiffany,

Sounds like your dad is taking it all in stride. Looking back now, it all seems surreal and we just have to deal with the hand we're dealt in life, as much as that sucks sometimes. I know how chemo can "knock you to your feet" as I have been throught it myself.  Had to get "hydration" "treatments, Neulasta injections and got pneumonia 3 times during the course of treatment.  The tiredness is the worst and nothing was done to help me get through that aspect.  You are giving your father a lot of what he needs,  by loving him, hugging him and talking to him.  I just lost my 94 year old mom to metatastic breast cancer back in June. She was diagnosed at age 82 and had a metastisis to her small bowel in 2013. I have to tell you that I'm so grateful I was there with her and kept her in my home until the end.  We had some great conversations and I encourage you to just keep the communication going.  I know how hard it is watching anyone suffer with cancer.  I would leave the room and cry.    Looked like a rabbit sometimes with my pink eyes and Tammy Faye Baker with streaks of eye make-up running down my face at others. Try to keep your spirits up as well.  I know you just want to cry sometimes and that is ok. I hate cancer so much and I wish a cure would be found for all cancers.  I do know someone who had aggressive P.C. and it was all ready in his spine when it was discovered but he lived (and I know this is almost impossible to believe) for almost 10 years and enjoyed life and had good quality of life until about a year before his death so there is hope.  Only God knows what will happen with your dad.  I'm not a particularly religious person but there is comfort to be found in believing.

 

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