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Joined: Jul 2013

Hi, I am new on here.  We were just dealt with this blow about 2 months ago.  Tumor on her brain was removed but did not "originate" there. Mom has already gone thru one round of chemo, 3 days chemo and shot on 4th day. She's very weak and tired all the time.  My dilemma, she has no will.  She refuses to eat if she's not hungry and has been told to drink more fluids. (Boost once a day does not constitute fluid). Dr. appt today, she is a little dehydrated and BP is low. Fell earlier today and couldn't get up and twice while with me going to appt's she had to stop because she was dizzy.  Tried explaining to her that she needs to eat/drink to give her energy.  Another visit with Radiation/Oncology (for future radiation treatment to her brain) and with her Oncologist tomorrow for blood work.  I am going away on vacation next week and have set up transportation for her to her chemo treatments.  She has been staying with her cousin, but unfortunately she is having surgery herself on monday.  I feel guilty going away, but I NEED this vacation with my husband and children.  I had a week off in July and sent my family on their way without me because mom was in hospital and I needed to stay with her.  I know I need to take care of ME so I am able to help her and keep my sanity.  Trying to get a friend of hers to go check on her a couple times a day. But if I can't, what kind of services are out there, meaning are there places I can bring her to be taken care of while I'm away.  I really wouldn't be surprised if she gets admitted to the hospital.  Any suggestions/comments are welcome. Thanks

gillimom's picture
Posts: 5
Joined: Jul 2013

I am sorry for you. My mom was diagnosed the day after Mother's Day 13 with extensive stage 4 small cell lung cancer that has spread to her liver, lymnodes, spine, skull bone as well as other bones in her body. She is not doing well. Been in and out of hospitals and has completed two rounds of chemo which she is not tolerating very well at all.

A lot of people have told me to contact HOSPICE even though she is not on her death bed as of the moment. I have been busy with her that I have not had time to contact them. My friends said they wished that they would of known hospice could get involved earlier.


Posts: 844
Joined: Mar 2011

See if your hospital has a palliative care program.  Unlike hospice, palliative care patients may be treated with life extending medications and procedures. Best hopes for both of you.  

Posts: 2
Joined: Sep 2013

Bless her heart but you said "My dilemma, she has no will."  If that is indeed your dilemma, here's the deal: she is dying and without a will decisions about her estate will be made anyway, just not necessarily those she might have made in more lucid times.  If she has substantial assets get your butt in the office of an estate lawyer NOW.