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ENT on thursday

Posts: 1914
Joined: May 2012

Hey everyone !

Have another three month check up with the H/N guy.  No scans that I'm aware of until Nov.  But hee-hee we all know this can change up on us in a blink of an eye.  So I'm assumming scoped....the good old once over with the lump checking....and I swear if he gives me that (what I call the long face) again I may swear like a sailor. 

I also have checked into extra help through some local agencies to see what if anything they can offer me.  I walked my parents through this a few years ago, just never thought I'd be here doing this for me.  I am trying to stay positive and upbeat....but my reality is I will never get better.  Kinda sucks, but there it is.  People have asked me if I could get a lung transplant as one of my cousins had this done for cystic fibrosis, and is doing wonderful.  The answer of coarse is NO because of the cancer dx.  Pooh on it. 

I am not whinning or looking for sympathy....just understanding.  I keep alot from my family, as they either don't get it....or won't accept it.  either way, it's a lonely very personal walk I'm on right now.  I'm wishing for a way better outlook for the younger generations and a cure found for this beast in their life time.  Hugs sent to all !  Stay strong and give "em hell !  Katie 

debbiejeanne's picture
Posts: 3095
Joined: Jan 2010

katie, i did not know u r terminal and i'm very sorry to hear that.  u couldn't tell by ur posts as u r always encouraging to others.  you are amazing.  it's ok to cuss like a sailor once n a while...lol. 

when u say "lump checking", what does that involve?  is it just him feeling on ur neck?  my ent hasn't scoped me or anything else.  that kinda worries me.

you feeling all alone is understandable.  u can always come here for understanding!  i wish we could really b there w/u.  cybre doesn't let u give a real hug.  i wish i could hug u right now and i wish u weren't alone.  continue 2 come here and we will be here 2 encourage u.  sending u a cyber hug.


CherieLW's picture
Posts: 472
Joined: May 2013


I also did realize that your cancer is terminal.  I can only imagine how alone you feel at times, just remember that God is always with you so technically you're never alone! Not trying to sound preachy, but... just encouraging.  I often worry about my dad feeling alone in this, but I just try to do what I can to make him smile.  The docs think he will be cured, but I realize nothing is a gaurantee and I don't take any time with him for granted.  I hope that you get some good news at the doctors and things change around.  Miracles do happen as I have seen it happen many,many times.  Love that you are typically always upbeat on here (I know everyone has their days) and giving advice to those like me, who feel helpless watching their loved ones go through this.  I try to understand as much as one can who is not in any of your shoes. 

Wishing you the best and praying that things look up!


CivilMatt's picture
Posts: 4317
Joined: May 2012


Your check-up will be fine so we won’t need to practice swearing. You see I subscribe to Katie’s method of positive thinking.

I hope you get the help you seek, if you need a reference I am available.  I have got to be good for something?

I do get it, I do understand and I do respect you Katie, but I always hope there is more, more of everything good, give cancer the boot.

Best always,


Skiffin16's picture
Posts: 8286
Joined: Sep 2009

My prayers continue for you.....

Miracles do happen...



donfoo's picture
Posts: 1648
Joined: Dec 2012


I admire the fight and spirit you have. There are some days that are surely more diffricult than others. Please do lean on us here when it is hard to do so in the real world. Certainly cyber-family can not hold a candle to real world relations but we are real people behind the keyboard and do have true empathy with your struggles, although slightly different with the focus on lungs now. In the end, we are all cancer survivors and that makes us brothers and sisters in arms forever.

God bless you everyday Katie! don

phrannie51's picture
Posts: 4672
Joined: Mar 2012

and both posts when to CSN hell....

Katie...we do a good job on answering questions.....but we also do a decent job of holding hands and giving hugs, even tho we don't have answers to some things....we are great listeners.  You can leave some of the baggage of your walk here...

Hoping that ENT gives you a smiley face....but would love to be a fly on the wall if you cuss him out.... :)


osmotar's picture
Posts: 1005
Joined: Jul 2011



Like everyone else I never knew your condition ...but girlfriend you have always been upbeat, either in your posts or your responses to other posters. Attitude is everything , you got yoursgoing full steam, and if that includes 'cussin like a sailor now and then so be it..sometimes thats the only way to let it all out or get someones attention.


Blessings and prayers for you.




jim and i's picture
jim and i
Posts: 1788
Joined: May 2011

I understand Katie. Jim canceled his ENT oncologist visit for next week because he said, "Why pay for him to say, still there." He does keep in touch with regularly with the medical oncologist as he does the palative care and prescribes meds for pain if needed. So far the prayers and positive attitude have slowed it down in growth. Docs said he would be gone by now. So keep the faith and I will keep praying for you.



hwt's picture
Posts: 2330
Joined: Jun 2012

Hope is what we all have in common.  Today my prayers are for you.



fishmanpa's picture
Posts: 1217
Joined: Jan 2013


I can't begin to put into words the admiration I feel for you. You're facing the beast in a way that I could only hope to achive should the same fate befall me. In my battle thus far, I've found that attitude plays a huge role in beating cancer. It's also attitude that plays a huge role in keeping it at bay should one be facing what you are facing. 

My thoughts and prayers are with you and keep in mind that miracles do happen. 


Posts: 80
Joined: Apr 2013


Your positive attitude has always helped me and many others when struggling was a daily word.   This is such a hard and painful road.  Use all of us for whatever help we can offer you. 

Posts: 1914
Joined: May 2012

I had my meeting with a social worker today and a RN.  Wonderful caring understanding women.  I have been so blessed in the past two yrs., first with my CSA family....great doctors....my beautiful family....and now people reaching out to keep me at home for as long as possible.  We talked of many things....not just health related.  I had to laugh when they asked about any drug use now or in the past.  I laughed out loud and said hell yeah back as a kid in the 70"s. (pot)  And admitted I asked my onc's and primary about it also.  But we live in a state where it's illegal....oh well.  They are able to help....and as I need to transition they will help my family with this also.  I don't know what this will entail, but am making a legal document up that will stand.  BELIEVE....such a beautiful word.....my faith has brought me this far.  I bragged you folks up really strongly to these gals.  I wish that I could explain the feeling....I guess unless you're there yourself....you wouldn't comprehend.  Hugs sent to all !   Katie

Greg53's picture
Posts: 848
Joined: Apr 2010



As a quasi old timer here, I have to say you are at the top of the list that I’ve seen with attitude and spunk.  Sending you some good mojo!


Positive thoughts!


Posts: 839
Joined: May 2013

I love your attitude and will be praying for you and cheering you on! You have an incredible attitude and you're such an inspiration to everyone you come in contact with! ((Hugs))

luv4lacrosse's picture
Posts: 1410
Joined: Jul 2010

Hey Katie, I just know the news will be good. Positive thoughts on the way.



Hondo's picture
Posts: 6643
Joined: Apr 2009


Yes sometimes life really sucks to put it mildly and we don’t understand the Y me Lord Thing. But like you we learn to except the bad and try to make as much good out of it as we can. When you said you know you will never get better, I thought the same thing when my C came back a third time. I had a lot of people praying for me along with doing a few other things to help my body; that was all about 9 years ago. I hope you don’t mind if I keep you in my prayers, because prayer really do work.


Take care


Duggie88's picture
Posts: 703
Joined: Feb 2010


I was never a sailor but I am a Teamster which means I almost swear like a sailor. In a poker game you have to play with the cards you’re dealt. I’m looking at your hand and yelling “Katie don’t fold”. Please………… stay positive, my thoughts and prayers are with you.

Also, remember we are always here for you and when you’re down and feel lost hop on board and allow us to drive for a while.


Grandmax4's picture
Posts: 709
Joined: Dec 2011

Katie, just wanted to let you know, you're one of my favorite CSN friends~~I don't think there has ever been a time, I've posted, that you haven't responded with a sweet, kind answer. It saddens me to read your post, Each day, I wonder ,is this the day a cure for cancer will be found, it could still happen in your life time, but if not, "Give Em Hell"  Peace!

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