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H&N Humor

Laralyn's picture
Posts: 531
Joined: Apr 2012

I decided a couple weeks ago to buy 23andme evaluation for myself and my boyfriend. They analyze your DNA to look for heritage as well as genetic tendencies toward various diseases and disorders. I figured it would be a mouth swab.

Nope! You have to spit in a tube, to collect about an inch of saliva. The instructions say the whole process takes about 5 minutes, and they're very specific about bubbles not counting toward the required amount of saliva. It took me 20+ minutes to generate that inch of saliva!

Now when the results come back that I have a genetic tendency toward oral cancer, things will have come full circle. ;-)

(Kidding, of course, since I had HPV+ SCC, so although genetics may have contributed, there's a known cause).

At any rate, I was laughing the whole time I was trying to spit into that tube, and figured I'd post here in case anyone's going through treatments and feeling down. The treatments end, and even if you have side effects, there's still humor!

CivilMatt's picture
Posts: 4570
Joined: May 2012


What if you find out you are a “super hero” (from the radiation). Other than cured, there has to be something good from rads.

Well, it is lucky you did not try 23andme 6 months ago, it would have taken 40 minutes to fill the tube with your (DNA) spit.

I checked out their website. It looks to be interesting, maybe you’re a Viking. Now as I remember, you do have history of travel, don’t you?

Well, it could have been worse, they could have asked for a speech too.

H&N members are full of adventure.


phrannie51's picture
Posts: 4708
Joined: Mar 2012

look it up, and see what it was....it sounds like such an interesting thing to do.  Then, having just gotten up, realized it would take me 3 days to come up with an inch of spit....generally making saliva collection a new found pastime....LOL.  I will be intersted in your results, tho....so do share them when you get them.

Just thinking tho....what if new things to fret about come up?  I'd hate that.....ha!


D Lewis's picture
D Lewis
Posts: 1577
Joined: Jan 2010

No Fair!  I want spit! 


D Lewis's picture
D Lewis
Posts: 1577
Joined: Jan 2010

The only way I can spit and/or lick an envelope is if I take a mouthful of water.  I don't think the DNA testing would work on tap water...


peggylulu's picture
Posts: 375
Joined: Dec 2012

I'm with P and Deb I couldn't do it now ... unless mucous counts !


Grandmax4's picture
Posts: 719
Joined: Dec 2011

and would love to hear the resultsCool

Billie67's picture
Posts: 898
Joined: Jul 2012

I'm with the others, I can't lick an envelope 10 months out from treatment. By the time I could collect enough saliva I fear I'd be too old to care much about my genetics haha
Now with all the water I drink, I'd be able to do a urine test no problem but I guess that's a whole different thing.

CajunEagle's picture
Posts: 408
Joined: Oct 2009

I giggle at myself each morning trying to get moisture on my thumb to turn the page of the newspaper, and not realizing at first why it doesn't happen.


Skiffin16's picture
Posts: 8299
Joined: Sep 2009

LOL, made me reflect....

I am a coffee drinker, so I took a sip and used it to lick the envelope... LOL...., wrong, unless you have a dark envelope that is...


rachel12yrsuv's picture
Posts: 435
Joined: Feb 2013

Thats funny if a bunch ofbus wouldve been there someone would broke a rib from laughing so hard!

Thanks Laralyn i needed that!




SASH's picture
Posts: 409
Joined: Apr 2006

I use self sticking envelopes so I don't have to worry about licking them.  For those that require to be licked, I wet my finger and use that or ask my wife for her "Moistening Appendage" to lick the envolope.

When people ask me about my radical neck scar I give one of the following responses:  1.  My Columbian Necktie  2.  I was turned into a Pez Dispenser  3.  My permanent Smile.

Laralyn's picture
Posts: 531
Joined: Apr 2012

...but when I do, I spit extra frothy.

(waiting for the bubbles to go down takes forever... and then you discover what you just spit was 99% bubbles...)

I'll post what I find out when I get the results. The site has you agree to pretty standard terms except this one bit that essentially says YOU CAN'T UNKNOW THIS about what the testing might reveal. We've all already dealt with some pretty unexpected and unwelcome news, though, so I feel prepared for whatever they might tell me. It takes 7 weeks or so to process, I think.

Skiffin16's picture
Posts: 8299
Joined: Sep 2009


Posts: 1914
Joined: May 2012


I think that geno testing is still in it's infancy.  I sent my tumor in to get it typed.  Have the results, and not one marker indicated a tendency to evolve into adcc.  Maybe it's a darn duck shoot.  But the results are on a registry now....probably won't help me with tx's.  But I am keeping copies of the results in my files for future reference for my kids and grandkids.  I remember having to try to spit in a tube after my lung resect....yeah that was a hoot.  All that went in was a few bubbles and a clot of blood.  I think it would be cool to know my heritage....out of this test.  But maybe they would've ran out of paper and time doing that.  Kinda heinz 57, too many to count.  Best of luck Laralyn !   Katie


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