Anxiety - Seperation

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Montreal
Montreal Member Posts: 7
in Head and Neck Cancer #1

Hi, After being cured from a tumor on my tonsil. I have a great amount of anxiety about going on a short trip.

I have been told that this "normal" and that I am not alone. That my anxiey is the fear from separation from the people and places that helped cured me.

I would appreciate any feedback.

Much Thanks

Comments

  • phrannie51
    phrannie51 Member Posts: 4,716
    #2
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    What a coincidence....

    ...I never thought about this type of anxiety being related to cancer, but maybe so!  Last summer I was unable to attend my college reunion, and 4 of my girlfriends decided that the next summer we would all get together.  Well, "time to make reservations" came, and I was dragging my feet, but bit the bullet and made them.  The vacation is only for a week....girl time....get to stay at a gorgeous Lusitano ranch (those are a breed of horse and I am a BIG horsie girl) in northern Ca., everything about this trip would have had me on cloud 9 in the past....but now every time I think about going, my stomach flip flops.  I am not excited at all, and I should be!!

    I have till June 11th to worry and fret, or get over it....I have done much self searching for why I'm so anxious about it...maybe it is about being too far from safety??

    I'm no help, but at least we're in the same boat....LOL.

    p 

  • HobbsDoggy
    HobbsDoggy Member Posts: 276
    #3
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    Same Deal

    I have some regluar vacations secheduled starting towards the end of May, last radiaton 12/13 and am sort of afraid.  These are things I have done for many years and now wonder, will I be able to eat, be strong ennough, what happens if I get sick, etc.  The only way I know how to handle it is to not back out now and just force myself to go.  In my more rational moments I think things will be just fine and if I get tired or weak while going, just rest and not do quite as much as I did in the past.  Still the fear is there and only by doing it will I get rid of the fear.  Will I go, I sure hope so, but cannot be 110% sure.

  • CivilMatt
    CivilMatt Member Posts: 4,722 Member
    #4
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    Live

    Montreal,

     

    Have water bottle will travel.

     

    I feel a special affection for my rad onc and my rad tech team, I like them better than many people and felt a bit lost (on my own) when they cut me loose from the cancer dock.  As crazy as I am about them, I hope I never cross their business path ever again.  I would be happy to visit or see them again, but only as friends.

     

    For me anxiety was wearing the mask, for which I took 1 Lorazapam.  Going on a trip is worrying about something to drink, getting tired, having to talk to much, all these things I can deal with.

     

    I don’t think I will ever climb the Himalayan Mountains, but a short trip I think I can wrangle through and if you are prepared you can do it.  Besides, you said it your self you are cured, get out there and enjoy life.

     

    Best,

     

    Matt

  • Tim6003
    Tim6003 Member Posts: 1,514 Member
    #5
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    Agree and like with all on here

    ...but it can't be said any better than CivilMat said it ...go live and send them a postcard....but on that note I promise I can relate...

    Best,

    Tim

  • katenorwood
    katenorwood Member Posts: 1,912
    #6
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    Wonderful subject !

    Hello there !

    No you're not alone in this !  But Matt say's it best.  I want to soooo much say asta levesta (spelling way off) to any and all doctors.  For most of my life, the most I received was a pennicillian shot in the rear for strep.  And then cancer reared it's ugly head.  I am so sick of being put in scanners, xrays machines, being poked and prodded.  My dx is one not understood and not many tx's to beat back.  Anxiety of the what if's takes so much energy, and takes away our quality of life.  Jump back into life my friend, and try to enjoy what you can.  If ever you need to fight again, you will.  Only good thoughts sent your way !    Katie

  • lorig01
    lorig01 Member Posts: 83
    #7
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    I felt the same way

    Hi. I don't think  you are alone.  2 months out from my treatment I planned a trip to stay with my sister in Florida.  I was very anxious about going. Prior to treatment I had traveled quite a lot and had even traveled to the mid east by myself so I was not afraid of travel. I think my biggest fear was eating. I was on the feeding tube at the time and I had shipped a case of "food" to Florida but I worried about it.  When I returned to work I was off the tube but I was constantly worried about eating. I brought cases of Ensure with me but if I had to go out to lunch, (well I didn't eat), I was stressed about how long it was since I had eaten. I am also almost obsessed about getting enough calories. So at least for me I think my anxiety stems from being and feeling vulnerable.  For example, when I saw the video of the cruise ship that was stalled off of Mexico all I could think about was what if I had been on that ship? What would I have eaten?  I guess as I get used to my new normal I am starting to relax but I still always plan ahead and think about all of my meals if I will be gone a day or 2.  So if you are traveling and are worried about food you can ship ahead or if you can drink by mouth remember that in the US there are CVS's and Walgreen's everywhere and you can always get Ensure.  Hope that will make you feel more comfortable with traveling....

  • Ingrid K
    Ingrid K Member Posts: 813
    #8
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    go for it

    Hi Montreal

    as others have said, just go for it.  You have to jump back into the life you had to put on hold during treatment.

    You don't mention where you are going, but in most places you can easily find a grocery or drug store that carries Ensure, Boost or something similar if you are still on a PEG.   Most restaurants are happy to get you something special from the kitchen--most things can easily be blended...just have to ask.

    the anxiety is very very common--I think we all had it to some degree.  the days of having a schedule to keep, appts. to keep, the everyday routine comes to an abrupt stop on the last day of treatment.  Although none of us wants a do-over, all of a sudden the activity stops and you feel let down a bit.  It will get better and maybe all you need is a .....VACATION TRIP !!

    enjoy...you will do fine.

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