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Joined: Apr 2010

Friends, she no longer can stand up to go to the bathroom, she was devastated because she had to use a bedpan/pamper. She had the second dose of the trial chemo on Friday, nothing to eat. Saturday, she slept all day and ate nothing only a few sips of juice or water and was getting very agitated at the nurses. Sunday morning around 8:00 she sat up on bed and wanted to get up then her eyes rolled back and she started to rub her stomach. Pain medicine(morphine) was increased to make her comfortable. She is now in a coma. They gave us 48 hours. My beautiful most lovely daughter is losing the battle. I had a chat with her on Friday morning and she told me and my other daughter that she was dying because she can feel a tingle in her chest but she was really not ready. Friends, I know that this is all part of life and that we cannot curl up and die with our loved one, but my heart is shattered. When do we put the pieces back together and how long does it take to come to terms with losing a 45 year old daughter. This week is one year since diagnosis and my child was sure that she was going to survive this monster. Just Friday she asked the Doc if he had given her the chemo. I know that she was disappointed that she did not get better.
So many nights I prayed that God would give me the strength and health to take care of her and I was granted that privilege, Thank God, she was not married no children. Family and friends are with me at her bedside and she is really comfortable, no sounds or signs of pain.
This is all for now. I love you all and wish everyone continued good health.

debrajo's picture
Posts: 1095
Joined: Sep 2011

Oh my dear, I am so sorry for you! I know a little of what you are going through. I stood by my infant sons' incubator watching his struggle and in so much pain. I then had to make the decision to turn off life support. I was so sure your daughter would get better. I've been told that God answers prayers three ways: 1.yes, 2. Not now, and 3. I have something better in store for you. Stay strong,this will hit you hard later on.Please take care of you. My prayers are with you all. Love, debrajo

Sisters three
Posts: 165
Joined: Nov 2012

I am new to this sight but have gone back and read the trials of your daughters illness. I am so sorry but am glad that she is comfortable. I have lost an
Adult son and know the pain. Rest when you can.

God Bless all of you!

txtrisha55's picture
Posts: 696
Joined: Apr 2011

May God continue to hold you, your lovely daughter and the rest of the family and friends through this journey. May you all find peace. I personally cannot relate to losing a daughter, or a child at all, but I have lost both my parents and that is an emotional time. Praying for all of you. trish

Posts: 1574
Joined: Jun 2012

I so hoped you all would have some more time together. Thankfully you are finding the strength and have the health to be at her side. We are all with you in spirit.

With love, connie

jazzy1's picture
Posts: 1385
Joined: Mar 2010

I as well hoped you and your daughter would have more time. Nothing in life can prepare us enough to watch a child pass before us.

Hope and pray you gain strength to be strong for your dear child.

Peace be with you and your family~~

daisy366's picture
Posts: 1493
Joined: Mar 2009

You and your family have my heartful sympathy and lots of prayers.

God bless you all.

Mary Ann

crystalblue1208's picture
Posts: 38
Joined: Apr 2012

My heart aches and is bleeding when reading your update. I've not been up nor posted any update here lately as the outlook of my sister isn't good either. She is mainly under palliative care and I don't even know if it's going to be a wise idea to get her on any clinical trial.

Like you, my mom is also the primary caregiver of my sister. Mom is an ovarian cancer survivor and has been in NED for almost 4 years. (Her 4th anniversary will be in 2 weeks) She is a faithful Christian and her cancer fighting story is a real victory. That's why I always thought the same healing could happen to my sister but never thought my sister would go a totally opposite way.

Our primary goal at the point is to keep my sister as conformable as possible. I never believed in "miracle" or such thing called "spontaneous remission" but because of my dear sister, I will still do my best to seek any possible for her even all conventional treatments have been running of out answers in her case.

Take care, dear nempark. I will keep you, your daughter and the rest of the sisters who are fighting the same devil in my prayer.

Posts: 683
Joined: Apr 2010

Keep her comfortable as much as possible. My daughter had too much medicine. Talk to her and love her as much as possible. my story is almost the same as mom. I pray that mom keeps healthy, also the rest of the family. Keep in touch.

crystalblue1208's picture
Posts: 38
Joined: Apr 2012

Thank you so much for the comfort, support, and encouragement. My thoughts and prayer are also with you and your family. Take care~

Posts: 125
Joined: Sep 2010

Nempark - there is nothing to say. Know you are being prayed for by your sisters here on this site. I am so sorry that you are going through this and I can't begin to understand the pain.
Hugs and prayers

Ro10's picture
Posts: 1579
Joined: Jan 2009

I cannot imagine the pain you are feeling. I too pray for you to have strength as you endure this tragedy. I pray for peace and comfort for your beautiful daughter. Sending you a big cyber hug. In peace and caring.

HellieC's picture
Posts: 524
Joined: Nov 2010

There are no words that I can add to what has already been said. I, too, pray for you to have strength and for your daughter to be comfortable.
Thinking of you and your family

norma2's picture
Posts: 486
Joined: Aug 2009

My prayers and thoughts are with you. May God grant you and your family grace at this terribly difficult time.

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