Sep 13, 2012 - 8:01 pm
I am really struggling with discouragement and feeling hopeless. After my 9 month remission, I'm back in chemo for a recurrence in a lymph node near my left collar bone. (As I posted earlier having a tough time with taxol/cistplatin).
I now have my teaching license (at age 50), but could not find a job because of my health. I will be able to substitute teach as I feel like it.
Since my husband's death in '10 I want to get out on my own. I've been with my sister and her family for over 2 yrs. It's like there's no "light at the end of the tunnel."
How can I keep this disease from defining me? It's like I have to deal with it constantly because of dr. appointments, etc.
I have applied for disability. Hopefully that won't be a battle. I have spoken with an attorney in case I am turned down. I was told that when I turned 50 I could draw widow's disability from my husband's S.S. I haven't worked outside the home in 25 yrs. (and yes I loved being a stay at home mom) Our plans were always for me to return to work when the kids were grown.
Any suggestions? After Cistplatin I don't feel like doing anything for a while. People just don't understand how brutal this chemo is.