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lost mom almost 3 months ago

Posts: 1
Joined: Jun 2012

Hi. My name is Marissa. I am 21 years old. I lost my mother to stage 4 breast cancer on april 2, 2012. I am finally coming around to grieving. It is hitting me now and I am freaking out. When the busy work day is done and my boyfriend is not around to preoccupy me,the reality of my mothers loss sets in. I look around the apartment I lived in with my mom and cry. The crying feels good but it hurts. It feels as if I am going to suffocate on my tears. The pain in unbearable. Please can anyone give me advice who has also lost their mother?
thank you

Angie2U's picture
Posts: 2992
Joined: Sep 2009

I am so sorry for your loss. Ofcourse you miss her and have some hard days ahead, but, with time, you will start to find some peace and remember all of the happy times you shared.



Posts: 17
Joined: Mar 2012

You are in my prayers

Noel's picture
Posts: 3100
Joined: Apr 2009

My deepest sympathy.

Hugs, Noel

peanutcat's picture
Posts: 104
Joined: Mar 2011

I'm so sorry for your loss. My sister passed at 39 from Breast Cancer so I know how heart wrenching it is. I still miss her. Little things jar my memory.

Posts: 2515
Joined: May 2009

I can sympathize with you and have great empathy for you...I lost my Mom when I was 25.....not due to cancer...she had COPD and never smoked in her life....go figure! This is and old cliche but the only thing that helps is time...right now your grief is raw...you think you'll never get over this...in time the grief will ease...my mom died 36 years ago...I miss her still but I'm not grieving...of course, again, it's been many years...also I was married with two small kids that kept me from pulling the covers over my head! Now and for many years I look back and recall all our wonderful time that I did have her... Do you have any family that you can lean on?

Try to keep yourself busy when alone...perhaps have a friend over, call a friend, try finding something funny to watch on TV... If you like to read, Joan Rivers has just released a book titled "I Hate Everybody" I heard snippets on TV this morning...it sounds hilarious and I'm going to get it...I need to laugh too, for different reasons....she's 79 ...she goes into depth about all her plastic surgeries, personally I think she looks like she's been sucked through a wind tunnel...lol....her eyes have been pulled so tight they are just slits...I don't know how she sees!

Anyway, sweetheart, just give yourself time...don't let anyone tell you how grieve...everyone needs their own time and way...
We'll offer you support and encouragement...as best we can...we're here when you need us....
Hugs, Nancy

epark's picture
Posts: 339
Joined: Aug 2011

Sorry for your loss...just remember whenever you need to cry or talk we are always here for you.

God bless

Posts: 6587
Joined: Oct 2010

so sorry...I lost my dad at teen and my mom 5 yrs back...i still think of them both daily (EVEN after 33+ yrs) I try to think of the GOOD TIMEs, not the loss!

I HAD my dad 19 yr but they were 19 great years where some people have dad for life time..and not good father...

as hard as it is try (it will get a bit easier)not to dwell on the "DON'T HAVE"

i USED TO get sad each trip to Disney (went with both of them first time) NOW when I go i think of the wonderful great vacation with them!

maybe a journal would help! I know too new for you..but some day you will have holidays and laugh about things she said or did or about her traditions...

Give yourself time...HUGS..


Noel's picture
Posts: 3100
Joined: Apr 2009

I know it isn't easy ever to lose a parent and you are so young. My sympathy to you and your family. Please come here anytime to vent or to just write down your thoughts. You are surrounded with pink sisters now.

Hugs, Noel

Posts: 6587
Joined: Oct 2010

I hope I said my feeling ok not insulting or taking away from your pain...

Dont' get me wrong when alone (mostly MY car) I have a good cry...I know the pain...


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