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just finished another 5 day retreat with Ian gawler

pete43lost_at_sea's picture
pete43lost_at_sea
Posts: 3908
Joined: Nov 2010

30 other cancer patient and a few partner spent 5 Days meditating, eating great vegan meals ,exercising and learning and sharing.
All have been very committed to this lifestyle, so the content ad pretty advanced.

Ian's stories of real live success stories inspired me.

My 30 minute meditations once or twice daily are being increased to
3 times daily and now 40 minutes.

My diet and exercise routine was close to the most committed in the group. I possibly am also blessed with the best health.

So focusing on peace of mind and rest are my top priorities now.

My wife found it interesting also.

It was a really rewarding experience. I loved the meditations and jogging around the property chasing kangaroos with my dogs.

I can recommend this type of retreat if you want to try lifestyle alternative treatments.

Hugs,
Pete

Ps it's great to be back Home after driving 4000 km in 12 Days with wife, kids and dogs. Next time we might take the rabbits, but i draw the line at the fish.

Last night I came Home from a Days very peaceful meditation seminar to find out our dogs were missing. The local ranger picked them up and took them to the pound. We were worried.I wad glad to be in a calm state to deal with another line challenge. My daughter 10 burst into tears and we picked up the boys from the pound. We love our dogs.

pete43lost_at_sea's picture
pete43lost_at_sea
Posts: 3908
Joined: Nov 2010

I guess not alot of interest here in this retreat, but i thought i would share it.
I am a bit retreated out and will stay at home for a few months.

if you want a bit more detail, its below.
http://www.gawler.org/

i guess not alot of interest here in vegan, meditation and alternative cancer healing clinics.

gawler claims his appraoch is unique and effective and one of the longest running programs of its type in the world.

the claim seemed reasonable to me, in the flesh ian with one leg is inspiring and he is a genuine guy. he does not even drive a porche. he is clearly focused on helping all those who come to him seeking peace of mind.

i have an abundance of peace of mind and i thank ian and the foundation sincerely.

hugs,
pete

tommycat's picture
tommycat
Posts: 790
Joined: Aug 2011

Hi Pete,
I don't think Ian Gawler is well known in the States....
I always enjoy reading your posts (even though sometimes I have to read them twice).
Take Care~
TommyCat

pete43lost_at_sea's picture
pete43lost_at_sea
Posts: 3908
Joined: Nov 2010

dear tommy,

i am just having to get a few things off my chest and i thought i would share them with you as you were kind enough to reply. you don't have to say anything, just read and ignore anything that follows.

its nice to know i have at least one person read my little story.

at this stage of my treatment getting my wife on board with juicing, diet and meditation is critical to getting another 20% out of each day's healing capacity. as those silly numbers of mine are stable i want to drive them down with will power, diet and exercise. i will save chemo for another day for someone else who needs and wants it. not that its offered to me now anyway.

i am going to ask gretta and csn if they can have a lifestyle board where those committed to crazy things like vegan diets, meditation and exercise can hangout.

i know we have a few here that are keen but i think we need more numbers to get a real sense of community support, which i don't feel here for lifestyle intiatives, even though i know everyone is caring.

its that sense of belonging and sharing that really helps keep me focused amongst like minded. often i come to csn here and i feel attacked and my treatment choices threatened because they are so different to others here. i don't think i have ever attacked chemo, but all the things i believe in have been attacked and ridiculed here by some. even tcm and diet.

lucky for me and unlucky for others i am one of the most determined unrelenting son of******** that god ever created and i will be dammed if i give an once of ground to this god aweful curse. so my journey continues on the alternative path at the moment getting the best help i can get along the way. that includes conventional and alternative and any other label that fits the treatments and supports i try.

its just the enthusiasm of shared beliefs with regard lifestyle is a powerful support, and well i don't sense it here and i know it would really help me.

heck i don't even get regular updates on the exercise post, my meditation post died and so did the vegan post. we are all on different journeys and i sincerely respect that, its a share that the difference may in fact be more significant than what unites us. I hate the idea of others feeling guilty for not trying some of the things i try. then i feel guilty for not sharing what i have learned, researched as if i will keep all the best info for myself.

i guess we cannot please all the people all the time.

so i will just continue being me, that all any of us can be.

hugs,
pete

janie1
Posts: 753
Joined: Apr 2011

Please keep sharing what you are learning. I wish i were where you are in this journey...ned. I'm not there, so i get wrapped up in the conventional stuff...which I hate....but I cant do anything much different right now.
I do plan to learn more about meditation and to practice it. I talked with a man a few weeks ago. He highly recommended meditation. He was misdiagnosed 22 years ago. Correct diagnosis is CRC. He had been at this a LONG time. Has been NED 5 years. He is very fit.
....mountain bikes, skis, juicing, and big into meditation. It was great talking with him..
.another success story, very motivational. Pete, we all cant do what you do, but i thoroughly get why you are doing it. I love that your wife and kids are in it with you. I think you do a lot for them. I must say, you are not boring, but motivating. My husband is 75% doing my diet changes. I'm grateful he doesnt drink a beer in front of me, even though I wouldnt be mad. He said he doesnt miss it. Wow, we can enjoy life without alcohol.....wonder what else we can enjoy.
Anyway, i hope i can enjoy life, live a more meaningful life....which is already happening, and be helpful and motivating to others
Pete, there are many people here, listening. Sorry, we may not show the support, so as for me, I will do better. It's good to communicate
What our needs are. I'm a believer of honest communication, getting it out on the table. It gets me in trouble sometimes, but i dont care....it brings out the true colors, and I want the true colors shining through....
oh, didnt Phil Collins sing that? No wonder i loved many of his songs...lol.
Take care, Pete.

pete43lost_at_sea's picture
pete43lost_at_sea
Posts: 3908
Joined: Nov 2010

try not to hate the conventional stuff, but try like hell to workaround or minimise its downsides while maximising its upsides.

i loved your story of the 22 year survivor. i gave me a real boost. thanks for sharing it.

amongst my friends i am kind of boring, no time for diving, no late nights for pizza, no big days at beer festivals and big 1kilogram 2.2 pound steaks. so at least i am not boring here.

i try to get to sleep real early also.

oh i am just the life of the party, i could almost be a "nun" except i am a bloke.

i guess i have put out here what my needs are and thanks for caring.

true colours, what a great song.

they really shine here, what unites us now i think about it is really much more powerful than what separates us. i just had to question it, to get my head around it.

i hope your smiling janie, i am.

hugs,
pete

Lovekitties's picture
Lovekitties
Posts: 3372
Joined: Jan 2010

I don't think that you should take lack of comment to mean that others have not read your post.

I read it, but just had nothing of value to interject into the mix.

I think you are right that this audience is different. Most are in active treatment for their cancer and must coordinate anything else with their medical team. If they are having any success at all, it is doubtful that they would stop treatment to try the alternatives.

Also remember that most here are dependent on their insurance covering (even if partially) their treatments. Here in the USA, most (if not all) of the things you are trying are not covered by insurance. Spending dollars on suppliments and seminars may just not be possible, without some extremely good numbers on a success rate.

I have read all your posts and keep hoping that one day you will tell us that you have found the magic bullet.

It is wonderful that your cancer appears to be in remission and that you have the finances to go out there and search for the best solution to keep it that way.

Yes, unfortunately in the past there have been some heated discussions about alternatives. We all need to remember that what helps one may not help another, and that includes traditional medicine.

I am sorry you were feeling ignored.

Marie who loves kitties

pete43lost_at_sea's picture
pete43lost_at_sea
Posts: 3908
Joined: Nov 2010

we have been on this wonderful board a while together now. and hopefully alot longer.

i guess i just was feeling a bit too unique. i know some read my posts, i did feel a bit ignored.

i just am way out on the limb all on my own. in some senses we all are.
but i know my mix of therapies is very different from many.

coping with that aloneness is kind of solved on this board, at least to some extent. see steves reply.

the issue about money and what treatments to do. well its so different for each of us.
on the course i was just on a guy went to asia and spent a small fortune of some interesting advanced therapies. he was still over weight and not focused on exercise like me. only one other was focused on exercise, she had constant pain from many brokn bones, she still out jogged me. she was an inspiration. so the more money the more options, but some comes more confusion. remember my february trip to germany or not for hyperthermia. now i did not go, i have had a good time with the family and friends and my cea is stable at 30. yuk thats still a bit high.

ironically even the lack of money or insurance ie like in most of the world ( underdeveloped countries ) could be a blessing in disguise as then they have basic traditional therapies that could given them a better quality of life and even a shot of cure if they followed some of the really cheap alternative healing approaches. but healing in our world is a big challenge the two biggies for me are fresh air and fresh water.

i do want to buy an indoor air purifier for the home, i do have a top class water filter that gives me some additional peace of mind. i know these things are out of reach for many trying to heal from this curse. so i am privileged to have tried what i have tried and to be where i am at. having my wife run our business and let me meditate and look after the kids has been a real blessing for me and my healing thus far. mind you a bit too much of a load for her.

as an example a couple of hours massage every few days is what i have heard helped ian gawler. its an area that i realise would help me alot. now i know that sounds crazy to the conventional team, but from where i am having a relaxing, loving massage every day could be very healing. i just have to get it organised with our cancer council. like $20 for a couple of hours massage each day.

you know even the "heated discussions" when we consider the emotions our friends are going through well, in my books they are not to hot.

i just would like to find more than a few like minded alternative souls doing my colorectal survival course. i just hoped on our board we may have had one or two that have done the vegan, meditation route.

now i guess this post has been bouncing around for a few days now and lots of kind words.

but interestly no similar souls doing the same thing in the USA or elsewhere on the planet that i have hooked up with.

so now i think gawler claim "to have a world class and unique approach" i think may have more merit than i gave him credit for. he is a meditation guru.

i really needed the deep meditation skills "ian gawler" instilled to allow me to achieve "the peace of mind" i needed to deal with the countless questions and contradictions i get each day amongst my support team in the alternative space. i said it somewhere else recently the alternative path is not for the faint hearted, its expensive in terms of effort, physically, emotionally and financially. and the benefits are certainly arguable, by no means certain, but for me they feel worthwhile.

my magic bullet may be out their, i suspect i already have it, i just have to relax, meditate more and visualise it. of course my prayer is that each of us finds peace of mind on our journeys either being patient or carer and of course long lasting health and to be greedy a huge amount of "joy". which when you think about it "joy" is something we all deserve in abundance given the "lack of "joy" some parts of our journey causes.

i hope this makes sense, you may need to read it more than once. i should have studied my english and grammar more diligently at school.

hugs,
pete

ps i am paying of the $3000 aud over 4 months for this course for ellie and me. i figured now was the time to focus all my efforts. like craig said in his immune post time will tell. i just mention the money because our business has crashed a bit and the money for therapies is more limited. i am still ordering from iherb my essential supplements.
i don't want to goback to work,i want to meditate.

Minnesotagirl
Posts: 141
Joined: Sep 2011

Hey Pete,

I continue to follow your story ~ I haven't posted or commented much in the past two months to anyone...

Keep writing, keep sharing Pete...I am following your footsteps through your words. Thanks.

"Minnie"

steved
Posts: 835
Joined: Apr 2004

This community thrives because of its diversity and I think that can be hard at times. I think you may find some value in being part of a group of similarly minded people but I also think there is huge strength in your participation in this more diverse group too. I am very different to yourself- I'm a doctor with strong belief in evidence based conventional medicine and science, I have made no significant lifestyle changes since diagnosis (was always pretty healthy anyway) and haven't participated in any complementary treatments beyond a course of probiotics. However, I do read (and at times respond) to your posts and I think some of the most valuable discussions here have occured when differing opinions can coexist and be put forward without conflict or offence.

This is a fairly unique community of people who psychologically are facing one of the most difficult challenges possible and emotions (from guilt to depression to hope and despair) are often overwhelming and will spill into the discussions- and it is right they do as a huge part of this community is about emotional and psychological support as well as advise and information.

Many here value your participation in that, but it needs to be mutually of value and I sense you are questioning the value of your participation for yourself. I would be sad if that drives you away but those decisions are your own. I hope you find a way to be at peace with your own existence in this group.

steve

MaggieCat
Posts: 54
Joined: Dec 2011

Diversity makes this group so supportive. Pete - you are unique... and important in giving voice to "hope" in many different forms.... Maggie

pete43lost_at_sea's picture
pete43lost_at_sea
Posts: 3908
Joined: Nov 2010

thanks maggie, yes "hope", where would we be without it.

its just taking me time to realise this. actually how different we are, its possibly the decluttering in my head from meditation that helps me to understand this.

my uniqueness, which i appreciate kind of showed up on this advanced vegan retreat where i was really the most obsessive or focussed. especially with regard exercise and supplments and alternative tests. i feel i have so much to offer from all my research, but realise i don't have the skills to advise people of the specifics.

i am well aware our uniqueness. its not just our personalities but our biologies and our tumours. we are so different we all are and how dynamic my biology is. i should say "how dynamic our biologies are especially in the context of our cancers". its this variability i have most issue with in conventional medicine.

obviously i am looking for my magic bullet, and maybe some aspects of my search maybe of use to others in either highlighting potential areas of focus or areas to ignore. this includes both lifestyle and the supplements.

but i feel comfortable recommending naturopathic and alternative gp consultations to anyone interested in the alternative path. often thats in conjunction with conventional treatments.

this lovelly quote is laminated in my bathroom, as i meditate in the bath i am committin g this to memory. quite and effort for my old overloaded brain. my kids are also working on memorising this verse. whoever gets their first gets a prize.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

hugs,
pete

pete43lost_at_sea's picture
pete43lost_at_sea
Posts: 3908
Joined: Nov 2010

at least we got shared experience in probiotics, i love the little critters.

as i have wandered down the alternative path, i am aware that i want to go out to dinner with carrot munching vegans not my old crowd of friends drinking and eating at the most amazing restaurants in china town at midnight. that was a different life. that old pete died the day i was diagnosed. the new pete i like, its just i am getting to know him.
i hope this makes sense.

its two years on the 3rd june since i was diagnosed. thats about 50Kilograms ago.

i don't really want to go back. my present health and wellbeing well is tenuous in my mind. i certainly don't take it for granted and am aware of how fragile current growing strength is. and just a few cells.

my muscle building is working, i did dead lifts yesterday. two workouts a week for 3 months with a private state champion vegan body builder. all for free. he likes my commitment and passion. he has called my bluff and i have to deliver.

I am sticking around, i love this place and the people, i would not come back if i did not.
and yes the differences of opinion are really positive. i just hope out of the hundereds on this board, i could have a heart to heart about the ins and the outs of the gawler retreat or us based vegan retreats.

i got to go pick up the kids from school for tennis.

hugs,
pete

for better or worse i have associated my survival with lifestyle interventions like diet, exercise, meditation and other alternatives.

danker
Posts: 1282
Joined: Apr 2012

I love your quotes. I wasn't evan aware of any alternatives. Just did what my doc told me to do. Last years colonoscopy was NED so she did right by me. May you enjoy many years of the good( if new) life!

pete43lost_at_sea's picture
pete43lost_at_sea
Posts: 3908
Joined: Nov 2010

i appreciate your following my foot steps, just i hope its only figuratively and not literally. i do get myself into a bit of hot water like the "three cheers for the immune system" post amongst others.

the irony here is that if have built may faith around the bodies innate ability to heal and so many here a relying on chemo, radio and surgery. they are not exactly mutually exclusive, its just when the conventional team basically attacks the immune system as being useless it brings up own personal insecurities that what i am trying is basically ridiculed as useless in conventional medical circles.

now i am strong enough to agree to disagree with many of my friends here. i guess i called it a mexican standoff over a year ago with blake, may he be resting in peace.

along time ago, i decided to share the facts that i have found, to make my choices, to share those choices and never to advise someone away from what they have chosen. be it chemo, or be it beetroot juice or whatever. i met an amazing lady fighting metastatic rectal with beetroot juice and meditation. i really wish her well but figured my way may have given her better odds. i did tell in detail about my 2 years journey with conventional and alternative all mixed together. she is at peace with her fight and i admire her.

the emotions i feel about being threatened are really my issues, but they are real.
if i permitted them to erode my faith and hope in what i am trying i would see my house of cards collapse. so despite a fews doubts and setbacks i focus harder on my alternative lifestyle.

i can equally see others feeling relieved that other treatments ( all non conventional ) are not generally used or tried widely. therefore reducing the "i am missing out" guilt trip. this would seriously upset there peace of mind. something i seek to minimise, but i feel my mere existance would have this effect

ironically "peace of mind" is my number one goal, i am achieving it, for me the prayer and substantial meditation allows me to do what i have to do each day with a smile, and to get alot of joy from my family and friends around me. its compromising others "peace of mind" with my research, with my obsessive way of doing my survival bid that is always in the back of my mind.

hugs,
pete

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