cancer family

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janderson1964
janderson1964 Member Posts: 2,215 Member
I have an unbelievable support system with my wife, family, friends, employer, and great doctors but as supportive as they are they will never fully understand the emotions that I have experienced 24/7 for the past 6+ years and I will experience for the rest of my life. And I hope they never do have to experience it. Evan if I beat this disease one day physically it will always be with me mentally and emotionaly. Only another cancer survivor can truly understand. I concider each and everyone of you as my second family (cancer family). This forum and all of the survivors is one of the true blessings I have received from this long and sometimes brutal journey and it is a journey.

THank you all from the bottom of my heart for all of the support and future support. I hope that I can and will be able to provide support for you all through my journey/experiences and I have had many.

Your friend

Jeff

Comments

  • pete43lost_at_sea
    pete43lost_at_sea Member Posts: 3,900 Member
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    does that make us brothers
    hey jeff,

    nicely said. i feel the same.
    here is to lots of shared experiences to come, for you, for all of us.

    hugs,
    pete
  • Carl_Renee
    Carl_Renee Member Posts: 84
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    Totally Agree
    I know I keep telling my Carl it is so scary on my end and I feel so helpless that I can't totally imagine things from his side to which he replies he wouldn't want me to. This latest round I think is sending him into a bit of depression and I have felt he is pulling away from us more to protect us in his mind. Where I know he leans on us for support he is very scared this round.

    I wish I could take his dog for him to visit with. I think she is going to be his everything thru this one. She is only going on 6 mos old this next week so highly doubting she will be allowed at the hospital for visits. Depending on the charge nurse on shift at one of the hospitals here it is possible but she is young and flighty yet and new surroundings she is unsure of and in excitement (such as not seeing her daddy in a month) might lead her to jumping up on him even though typically she doesn't but needs that reminder now and then.

    He is a serious planner he has to plan everything in advance. In some ways I think he is already doing that but has made several comments that as soon as he heals enough to travel from this round we are going back east to visit with his family no excuses or exceptions, no more mentioning we can't afford to do something due to money etc we will just figure out and if we say we are doing we are going to do it no more putting off. So I will definitely say this has changed him on many levels.

    Renee
  • janderson1964
    janderson1964 Member Posts: 2,215 Member
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    Totally Agree
    I know I keep telling my Carl it is so scary on my end and I feel so helpless that I can't totally imagine things from his side to which he replies he wouldn't want me to. This latest round I think is sending him into a bit of depression and I have felt he is pulling away from us more to protect us in his mind. Where I know he leans on us for support he is very scared this round.

    I wish I could take his dog for him to visit with. I think she is going to be his everything thru this one. She is only going on 6 mos old this next week so highly doubting she will be allowed at the hospital for visits. Depending on the charge nurse on shift at one of the hospitals here it is possible but she is young and flighty yet and new surroundings she is unsure of and in excitement (such as not seeing her daddy in a month) might lead her to jumping up on him even though typically she doesn't but needs that reminder now and then.

    He is a serious planner he has to plan everything in advance. In some ways I think he is already doing that but has made several comments that as soon as he heals enough to travel from this round we are going back east to visit with his family no excuses or exceptions, no more mentioning we can't afford to do something due to money etc we will just figure out and if we say we are doing we are going to do it no more putting off. So I will definitely say this has changed him on many levels.

    Renee

    Dogs are an awesome thing.
    Dogs are an awesome thing. We got 2 Weimaraners when I went through this the first time 6 years ago. This time we decided to get a parrot which we love and is a joy in our lives along with our dog. His depression should get better over time. I was very depressed in the hospital on my last surgery. It is an enourmous thing to experience plus all of the morphine puts you in a state of not caring. He is probobly trying to protect you. I hate seeing the look of helplesness and pain on my wifes face at different stages of this journey. I don't talk to my wife much when I am feeling really sick from chemo. It will only worry her more to complain or tell her how sick I really am. I think it is just as hard on the spouce as the cancer survivor. The difference is the spouce usually doesn't get all of the attention form others that the surivor gets.
  • Sundanceh
    Sundanceh Member Posts: 4,392 Member
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    Glad to Have You Here...
    Jeff, it's nice to have a fellow traveler who's in "the same neck of the woods" I'm in from a longevity standpoint......I'm just 3 months shy of 8-years myself...

    I think a guy like you can understand the perspectives that I'm bringing to the table that the new folks just cannot comprehend at this stage of their journey. You have to "walk those miles" before you truly get it.....

    Some of my biggest growth has come in years 5-8....I can't go back and neither can you, we're changed, to alot of degrees, much better than we were before, but we've paid one hell of a price for our lessons.

    Still, I'm glad I've got you around, because you really understand where I'm coming from - and it's good to have a good man friend in one's lives....thanks for having me in yours...and your always welcome in mine.

    The best to you, buddy!

    -Craig
  • tommycat
    tommycat Member Posts: 790 Member
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    Nice post Jeff--thank you~

    Nice post Jeff--thank you~
  • janderson1964
    janderson1964 Member Posts: 2,215 Member
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    Sundanceh said:

    Glad to Have You Here...
    Jeff, it's nice to have a fellow traveler who's in "the same neck of the woods" I'm in from a longevity standpoint......I'm just 3 months shy of 8-years myself...

    I think a guy like you can understand the perspectives that I'm bringing to the table that the new folks just cannot comprehend at this stage of their journey. You have to "walk those miles" before you truly get it.....

    Some of my biggest growth has come in years 5-8....I can't go back and neither can you, we're changed, to alot of degrees, much better than we were before, but we've paid one hell of a price for our lessons.

    Still, I'm glad I've got you around, because you really understand where I'm coming from - and it's good to have a good man friend in one's lives....thanks for having me in yours...and your always welcome in mine.

    The best to you, buddy!

    -Craig

    I feel like our cancer
    I feel like our cancer jouneys are so similar right down to how it has changed us. My biggest growth has come since the end of my fifth year and 6th year and I plan to keep growing and changing for the better in years 7 and 8. Once again you are right when you say it is a HELL of a price to pay but at least were are able to get something positive out of it. You are also right when you say the new folks just can't comprehend a lot of what you are saying. I couldn't have a few years ago. It took a second recurrence in order for your words to really make sense to me and hit home. Hopefully most of the new folks won't experience a recurrence. That really changes everything each time. I hate cancer and still plan to outlive it or live with it but now I have more respect for what a powerful adversary it can be.

    Your friend Jeff
  • janderson1964
    janderson1964 Member Posts: 2,215 Member
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    Sundanceh said:

    Glad to Have You Here...
    Jeff, it's nice to have a fellow traveler who's in "the same neck of the woods" I'm in from a longevity standpoint......I'm just 3 months shy of 8-years myself...

    I think a guy like you can understand the perspectives that I'm bringing to the table that the new folks just cannot comprehend at this stage of their journey. You have to "walk those miles" before you truly get it.....

    Some of my biggest growth has come in years 5-8....I can't go back and neither can you, we're changed, to alot of degrees, much better than we were before, but we've paid one hell of a price for our lessons.

    Still, I'm glad I've got you around, because you really understand where I'm coming from - and it's good to have a good man friend in one's lives....thanks for having me in yours...and your always welcome in mine.

    The best to you, buddy!

    -Craig

    I feel like our cancer
    I feel like our cancer jouneys are so similar right down to how it has changed us. My biggest growth has come since the end of my fifth year and 6th year and I plan to keep growing and changing for the better in years 7 and 8. Once again you are right when you say it is a HELL of a price to pay but at least we were are able to get something positive out of it. You are also right when you say the new folks just can't comprehend a lot of what you are saying. I couldn't have a few years ago. It took a second recurrence in order for your words to really make sense to me and hit home. Hopefully most of the new folks won't experience a recurrence. That really changes everything each time. I hate cancer and still plan to outlive it or live with it but now I have more respect for what a powerful adversary it can be.

    Your friend Jeff
  • steveandnat
    steveandnat Member Posts: 886
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    Dogs are an awesome thing.
    Dogs are an awesome thing. We got 2 Weimaraners when I went through this the first time 6 years ago. This time we decided to get a parrot which we love and is a joy in our lives along with our dog. His depression should get better over time. I was very depressed in the hospital on my last surgery. It is an enourmous thing to experience plus all of the morphine puts you in a state of not caring. He is probobly trying to protect you. I hate seeing the look of helplesness and pain on my wifes face at different stages of this journey. I don't talk to my wife much when I am feeling really sick from chemo. It will only worry her more to complain or tell her how sick I really am. I think it is just as hard on the spouce as the cancer survivor. The difference is the spouce usually doesn't get all of the attention form others that the surivor gets.

    babysitting sons wrimaraner
    Dogs are great company. I get to babysit my sons weimarner for two weeks. He is such a nice dog and great company. Jeff
  • thingy45
    thingy45 Member Posts: 632 Member
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    tommycat said:

    Nice post Jeff--thank you~

    Nice post Jeff--thank you~

    honored
    Hi Jeff,
    I am honored to be in your family. thanks for the post.
  • janderson1964
    janderson1964 Member Posts: 2,215 Member
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    thingy45 said:

    honored
    Hi Jeff,
    I am honored to be in your family. thanks for the post.

    I am honered to call each
    I am honered to call each and every one of you family members