Carl update

I get so busy with life. Kids still need attn, work, hubby etc I just don't make it here though I really feel I could use the support as the caretaker. Reading others travels helps me understand as we go thru this.

Anyhow Carl had his last CT Scan for his colorectal cancer in July all was said to be good, labs scans all looked clean, October Labs said to look good nothing to cause alarm, was back in hospital over Thanksgiving week was said to be a blockage in upper intestine that seemed to work itself out. Last week went in for what was hopefully his last CT Scan for 1 yr only for them to discover a large tumor in his liver. Immediately dr. said stage 4 you have a year maybe 2 if you do chemo said he didn't think it was operable but with our permission offered to send stuff to an dr. in Denver. We said yes thru our stunned state. That dr. sent back same feeling of stage 4 wants petscan. Did that yesterday. Went in for results today and still saying stage 4 but the dr. here doesn't want to touch it- is strictly sending him to Denver at this time. He gave differing scenarios of possible options. He said obviously Carl can't go off his labs because according to them nothing is wrong. This happened in the first place too when he was dx with colorectal cancer. Seems to just hit wham here I am. We are told chemo is our best option this time. Last time he was gray area as to do it or not so we opted for herbals and radiation. He stopped the herbals midway thru as he was feeling better not taking them than when he did take them. We are going herbals again only sticking with them, chemo, surgery, radiation whatever will help.

Just frustrating you do what ever you are suppose to so you can be healthy and you get this sick, yet those that don't seem to care about their health or what they do to harm those around you and they are healthy as can be it seems anyhow. I know in my heart this isn't entirely true just frustrated. That here is an amazing man, husband and father and he is going thru this. He hasn't been back to work in 1 1/2 yrs since date of dx of colorectal.

For those been down this road .... does everyone here throw markers? His has steadily been 1 from the beginning and bumped to 4 this round first time it has ever moved or changed. His liver panels were elevated this time but never before. Can you really go from "0" to stage 4 in a matter of a few short months?? Could this be anything but another tumor?

Just so frustrated and scared. We are currently waiting on Denver and will see what happens from there. Sounds like chemo is inevitable this time so that is new and scary thought. Any light or help anyone can shed that would be great esp on things that have gotten you thru.

Oh and another thing since surgery his hands go cold or at times numb, his "equipment" isn't working quiet right. He has desire but that is it. He was doing testosterone shots but that didn't do anything for that portion and now his levels are a bit high so has stopped them. Now and then even his foot goes to sleep as well. Could this just be the nerve bundles they took out with the tumor 1 1/2 yrs ago? He has had issues with fatigue and even memory issues even since no more radiation. That was a year ago in Nov when he finished treatment just how long does it take to recoup? I asked the dr. this very question in October and he said he should be past the worse of it by now, but now reading it is side effects of liver too so maybe he was having signs before it showed up??

I don't know so much going thru my mind as mother, wife, caregiver and sole provider I am frustrated.

Renee