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worried about worry

pete43lost_at_sea's picture
Posts: 3908
Joined: Nov 2010

Dear Friends,

What an interesting week, remember when we were teenagers we would have physical growth spurts, well I still think its possible to have emotional growth spurts, I feel like an old dog being encouraged to learn new tricks. So I have learned alot this week about many on our wonderful forum and myself.

Particularly the vulnerability of us all at different points of our cancer journey.

One wise and very old Amercian lady over 100 was asked her secret to happiness. She said I don't worry about anything. I believe this is good advice, but its not so easy with cancer or the prospect of recurrance.

So we have stage 4 friends struggling valiantly for survival and so many succeeding. They give us great hope.

We have many NED, maybe stage 2 and stage 3 worried about becoming stage 4. Thats my situation. So how do I get the worry monkey off my back ?

How do I defeat my fears be they of death or recurrance ?

How do I enjoy each wonderful day to its fullest ?

How do I keep the best of what cancer has given us and get rid of the worst ?

I thought I was living a rich life before cancer, but I was wrong.

Now the sky is more blue,
the moon more silvery,
the seas more vast,
and the night sky more ablaze,
my God is more real,
my kids more amazing,
my wife more beautiful,
and my friends more loving.


ron50's picture
Posts: 1729
Joined: Nov 2001

Take a bex and have a lie down dear:) Ron.

Posts: 753
Joined: Apr 2011

Reminds me of when i was all alone in the hospital after surgery and having just learned of the stage4 dx. in the most crude way possible.... and was watching the just developing news of the Japan earthquake (which actually made me feel like my situation wasn't so bad compared to that). I looked out the window and must have stared for an hour at a magnolia (?) tree that was in full bloom...maybe not magnolia, can't think of the name right now. Anyway, a tree never looked so beautiful....such vivid colors and detail. A mere 24 hours earlier, I wouldn't have paid any attention to the tree, wouldn't have even known it was there.

pete43lost_at_sea's picture
Posts: 3908
Joined: Nov 2010

hi ron.
Took your wise advise.
Been lying bed all day. Not been out of bed since 7am now its 7pm
no bex here but got some morphine.
Lets go fishing !
I want some more fresh tuna sashimi

PhillieG's picture
Posts: 4907
Joined: May 2005

Don't read all of those reports you find on the internet. I learned that one many years ago. Also, find a doctor/team you are comfortable with and have faith. Keep a positive attitude and do things you enjoy.

A friend of mine died of a heart attack at age 47 the week before Easter. No idea of any trouble at all. Anything can happen at any time to any of us so don't sweat what may or may not happen if at all possible. Of course there truly are times to be concerned but try to not let it all consume you.
That's been my experience.

Posts: 457
Joined: Dec 2010

I also want to learn not to worry about everything... ever since my mum was dx with liver met, I have never stop worrying about her! I try to live everyday to its fullest but seems not always successful!

But thanks for reminding me to try harder.
Best wishes!

Kenny H.'s picture
Kenny H.
Posts: 503
Joined: Aug 2010

Dont make me worry about you.

plh4gail's picture
Posts: 1238
Joined: Oct 2010

Yes Pete, I am there too and I agree with everything everyone else just said. I take life one day at a time and often moment to moment. I don't read too much info, and I don't do much research. Maybe this is wrong of me and selfish but I get too carried away with worry and grief that way. So I think I will go eat my toast and fruit breakfast, take my vitamins, play with the puppy, then go plant some flowers ....or heck go fishing with Ron!

Love and hugs to you , Gail

PS...I think you are such a kind hearted person and without intensions of hurt or harm to any of us. And I loved your little poem.

lisa42's picture
Posts: 3661
Joined: Jul 2008

Hi Pete,

I love your poem! It's so true... :)
Thanks for reminding me. Yes, it is hard not to worry (as someone who is stage IV and doesn't have any standard options left at the moment- relying on God and the natural supplements/treatment I'm doing to help me out with the chemo, as my current chemo is now acting as a dam wall but is springing some leaks).
I do pretty well most days of not freaking out mentally or emotionally- just trying to remain pleasant and see the good in life and in everything around me.
I find myself thanking God much, much more than before for creating all the beauty around me. Just taking the dogs out to do their business at night, I find myself staring up at the stars and just being amazed, then thanking God for the creation.

Thanks, Pete-


Lilmiss82's picture
Posts: 257
Joined: Dec 2009

After my diagnosis to realize that what is going on in my body was pretty much out of my control. Worrying whether this cancer is growing, dissapearing, or dying isn't gonna benefit me in any way. I can only control so much : like what I put in my body such as healthy foods, how often I exercise what supplements I choose to take etc., but what happens internally is beyond me. I have developed a stronger belief system and declared one day that my problems are in His hands, that to me was empowering. I will continue to do what is within my power to become a healthy cancer free person but if my plan doesn't go the way I hoped for at least I know I did what I could. Worry never solves anything but I do agree that a cancer diagnosis does put things into perspective I am able to see that beauty that this world has to offer something I took for grant b.c. -( bc is before cancer) :) melissa

pete43lost_at_sea's picture
Posts: 3908
Joined: Nov 2010

thanks lisa

just have faith and pray. When i read your post. It gets misty here.


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