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Semis and Caregivers, Family and friends...

Buzzard's picture
Posts: 3073
Joined: Aug 2008

Its been a very sad week for all of us. Although we knew when we took this role in this place that more than likely we would have to feel some of the losses by people with our issues. We never thought that these people would become our friends, our confidants, our family. Whew, its been sad, this week as well as most weeks in here some will receive bad news, some will pass, some just this week will be diagnosed and be as we were at some point, lost in all of this and looking for a hand to pull them out of the fog.
Although its sad that we lose our friends, but we must consider why we do what we do and face everyday news that most normal individuals could never deal with.....its because we are not normal, but fearless in facing what we know will come to pass and relentlessly staying the course to assure that the newly diagnosed will get passed the emotional onslaught that comes with a dx of this disease, much less the physical and financial issues that accumulate as well. It would be all for naught if we simply quit and just simply said I can't deal with this anymore. I can understand why individuals have to do this, it sometimes gets overwhelming, I have to take the breaks as well, it hurts, it hurts really bad, but for the betterment of the masses, and in respect for all of our friends and family gone, we persevere and stay the course to assure that our fallen are remembered, cherished, and brought up in conversation as if they are still around, and actually to me they are. I will cherish each one individually for each has their own reason for having a place in my heart. My life has certainly been blessed by being touched by them through their lives and family, stories, and love for their family at home as well as here.
We need to persist in being the diplomats and tour guides for the visitors that we are getting each day, and allow them to come into a place where warmth, love and solidarity abounds, and to remind them of the ones that were here that kept us up to snuff on new treatment regimens both Western and Eastern, down to earth answers, attitude and wit, how Moms, Dads, sisters, brothers, spouses were doing in their treatment both emotional and physically and just to let them know they will never be forgotten and each of their stories and antics will be passed on as family members always do.
We have lost a lot of friends, friends that will never be replaced, but each one of them has left a very vivid story and feeling in my heart and will be carried with me forever. I am a better person for being around each one, I am sure that all of us feel the same. My love and deepest sympathy goes out to all who have suffered losses in this journey, but through this journey there has been many friends I would have never known if not for this place. Thank you CSN for providing us a place to be with our peers, our friends, our family................Love to all of you........and may 2011 be the year of the cure..........buzz

Fight for my love
Posts: 1530
Joined: Jun 2009

Thank you,buzz,great post.It hurt like hell when I knew these bad news and it still hurts afterwards.It's like several pieces of my heart was taken away.One more thing I want to say is that their spirits are always with us,and they will be always heros.I couldn't never forget their strength,courage,faith, and attitude,that's what makes me and my hubby survive and live.Thanks to your love and friendship.

Posts: 3692
Joined: Oct 2009

Well said, Clift! You make sense out of this crazy world.

tina dasilva's picture
tina dasilva
Posts: 644
Joined: Sep 2010

Here's to the cure 2011

Fight for my love
Posts: 1530
Joined: Jun 2009

repeated is deleted

tootsie1's picture
Posts: 5056
Joined: Feb 2008

Very well said!


KathiM's picture
Posts: 8077
Joined: Aug 2005

If we say 'Hello' to someone, and share the brightness of their life, we must also say 'goodbye' with much love and respect.

I feel like the boxer in the ring...reeling from blow after blow after blow. But still I can't imagine leaving my family here...that is just too big a loss for me.

I send my hugs to all of you. We need to sleep, and come back fresh. I am so weary.

Tomorrow is tomorrow. We will once again pick up our life's pack, and journey on. But for today, I say we stop and rest awhile, enjoy the good things around us, reach out to those who love us.

Tomorrow is another day. "you raise me up to walk on stormy seas"

Hugs to all my family here. Kathi

Buzzard's picture
Posts: 3073
Joined: Aug 2008

a beautiful song for beautiful people.....Thank you Kathi, ((((((((((hugs)))))))))) and good night to all ...buzz

Patteee's picture
Posts: 950
Joined: Jul 2009

thank you buzz
and you are right- with this d*mn beast comes heartache and loss. In our own selves, in our families and in others. The messages of hope, support and genuine caring are critical to all of us facing this beast. And in that process we bond, we share, we love. And we lose. And it is heart wrenching, tears falling even now remembering the brave incredible loving people who this world has lost to cancer. I consciously chose to be here, in spite of the loss, even when the hurt is overwhelming. Because after me and you, and all those we have lost, there will be more. More people needing support and love and hope. And we will be here. I refuse to allow cancer to rob me of this experience. No way.

Kathleen808's picture
Posts: 2361
Joined: Jan 2009

Thank you Clift. Many of us are sorrowful this week. You have summed it up. It is good we have each other.

Thank you.

Warm hugs and aloha to all of you,

pete43lost_at_sea's picture
Posts: 3908
Joined: Nov 2010

we all cope with mortality in our own way. I have had many deaths around me so i have developed my own way of coping.

i strive to live in hope, with love and faith. its a beautiful world we live in, we share it with wonderful friends here on csn. yes i appreciate this site so much.

my life is richer for the gift of our friends departed.

i believe in my heart they would not want us to be down hearted with their passing so
i am trying to be grateful and have a joyous spirit in my heart for each of our friends who are resting in peace at last.

its easter soon and the easter message applies to me here as I am touched by these recents death's and my mortality is vivid to me.

if i feel a tear then i will smile and be thankful for the gift which is my life made richer by my friends.

love to all,


KathiM's picture
Posts: 8077
Joined: Aug 2005

I will try to follow your example....

Hugs, Kathi

pepebcn's picture
Posts: 6352
Joined: Aug 2010

Thank you for it!

lizzydavis's picture
Posts: 893
Joined: May 2009

I needed to hear that Buzz!

Thank you,


lesvanb's picture
Posts: 911
Joined: May 2008

how you keep coming back and posting lots of good little nuggets that help remind us of what a special community we have here with each other. If I had not come here and stayed I would have missed out on knowing and sharing with all the delightful people here. Though we don't necessarily meet in person, the depth of what we share bridges that separation. What a wondrous thing! I agree with you too Buzz, all who have passed still live with me. I enjoy when we are reminded of their words of wisdom. And then there are all who are new here or yet to come (though none of us, of course, would have chosen to be here) whose contributions keep adding to the richness of our lives. Thanks to all for your posts and your steadfastness.

Here is one of my favorite poems to share with you:

The Unbroken
By Rashani

There is a brokenness
Out of which comes the unbroken,
A shatterdness out
Of which blooms the unshatterable,
There is a sorrow
Beyond all grief which leads to joy
And a fragility
Out of whose depths emerges strength.

There is a hollow space
Too vast for words
Through which we pass with each loss,
Out of darkness
We are sanctioned into being.

There is a cry deeper than all sound
Whose serrated edges cut the heart
As we break open
To the place inside which is unbreakable
And whole,
While learning to sing.

Love, Leslie

Posts: 8
Joined: Oct 2010

For a lot of us I know we are kept here on this Earth to share our stories, to give that one person hope to beat this disease, and to be an example of what can be done even though you are faced with adversity like this disease. I tell all my family that I am happy that I am the one that was diagnosed instead of them, because I couldn't stand to see them go through this. I believe when you do hear those infamous words you do get a special inner strength that you would have never received if you didn't hear those words.

Buzz, you are an inspiration to us all. And, by your words it has rejuvinated my fight to spread the word that this can be beaten even though it does take some people from us that are very dear to our hearts.


TMac52's picture
Posts: 358
Joined: Aug 2010

Your a man who walks the talk. This indeed is a very sad week both on the board and in my family as my father struggles to keep breathing. Hospis is coming this morning. The love you so freely give to the semi colons and caretakers is plentiful and heartfelt. You have a gift those of us who read your post"s are the beneficiary of your gift.

marjans daughter's picture
marjans daughter
Posts: 21
Joined: Apr 2011

You have a gift with words Buzz, thank-you.


Kenny H.'s picture
Kenny H.
Posts: 503
Joined: Aug 2010

Great post Buzz.

angelsbaby's picture
Posts: 1171
Joined: May 2008

that was beautiful buzz.


Lovekitties's picture
Posts: 3346
Joined: Jan 2010

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and putting life and loss in perspective.

I will raise a glass with you to "A cure in 2011"!

luv ya,

Marie who loves kitties

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lisa42's picture
Posts: 3661
Joined: Jul 2008

Hi Buzz,

I so appreciate your words here- thank you. I have found lately that I tend to reply to posts of people I already am familiar with and have found it harder lately to reply to new posters and people who have just been newly diagnosed. I know I need to start reaching out to them again.
Thank you again for your words- it helps put it all in perspective.
Sad this week, yes for sure, but I also am so grateful for my "family" here- I don't believe I'll ever leave this board.

Hugs to you all-

Posts: 457
Joined: Dec 2010

Dear Lisa,

I don't want you to leave this board too! Stay healthy!

Love Dora

Posts: 457
Joined: Dec 2010

Dear Buzz,

I really like your post. It touches my heart. I also like your post about having the scientist and medical researchers to find the cure.

May 2011 be the year of the cure!
Love to you all

Posts: 157
Joined: Jan 2011

Thank you. JP

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