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Needed: Warning Labels

mswijiknyc's picture
Posts: 421
Joined: Oct 2010

There should either be warning labels or I should have thought ahead on some of what Patrick is going through. For example:

He will start sleeping more (I get little to no sleep)
He will have a sudden burst of energy (you better think fast! and have Herculean strength!)
He may lose control of his bladder/bowels (*sighhhhh* but those were the cute boxers . . . )

What makes this so much more interesting is I have to translate facial expressions and hand movements as his laryngectomy took his voice and he can't move his head much to try to talk. Makes it hard for me to leave to do anything as no one really understands what he's trying to say other than me.

I did get him pretty good yesterday. Told him I was going out and spending his money he started blinking all over the place. GOTCHA!

But the shoes and handbag are really cute. And my nails and toes look fantastic.

luz del lago's picture
luz del lago
Posts: 452
Joined: Jul 2010

That Herculean energy, wow! Knocked me down once! Thought I'd broke my hand as I put it behind his head to protect him, ended up crushing my hand on the bed rail! Dennis really wore us ( my daughter and I) down his last days. No sleep as we never knew when he would try to get up. Sadly, but mercifully, it wasn't until his pain began to intensify, and Hospice nurse called in the "big gun" pain meds, that he finally settled down. He never got up again, and for very minute movements, never communicated again.

Hang in there, girl. So glad you were able to take a little time for yourself. Still praying for you both, and keeping watch with you.


Posts: 221
Joined: Oct 2010

I continue to pray for you and Patrick. I am also glad you took some time for yourself. Take care.

Posts: 64
Joined: May 2010

for you've never lost your sense of humor...i love reading your posts!

yes, those bouts of energy. during my dad's, i swear he was doing somersaults in the bathroom when he fell! still never figured out how he hurt the ribs on his right side....everything he should have logically hit would have been on the left side.

anyway....i will continue praying for you and patrick! and also, for "the day" not to be tomorrow.

waiting with you,

debbieg5's picture
Posts: 170
Joined: Nov 2010

Hey April....do you have any friends with kids? Ask them if they have a "Magna Doodle". It's a board you can write on (works magnetically) and then you slide a button to erase it. When I couldn't read Ken's lips, he could write his messages to me on that. For Christmas, my Mom gave him a "boogie board". similar device but on a smaller scale and more adult looking.

Hang in there. Give your sweetie a big Valentine's hug/kiss.

Posts: 829
Joined: Aug 2010

Hi April,
Just thinking about you today and hoping things are going okay. I was just thinking, why not get Patrick a little blackboard to write on or one of those boards you can write on & erase? I bet he is so frustrated that he can't talk. I know Tom lost his voice, not completely, but was very hoarse and he got really upset if we couldn't hear him. Don't know what the heck I'd do if I couldn't talk!!
How is he doing today?? Hey, I think you should go shopping again and buy yourself a Valentines present! Sounds good to me.
Anyhow, HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!!!! "Carole"

Pumakitty's picture
Posts: 652
Joined: Mar 2010

I do not post very often on this board, but I have been reading all you have been going through. Patrick is a very lucky man to have you. My dad was diagnosed with tongue cancer last March and I know how hard been a caretaker can be. I am praying for you and your family. I am glad you are able to still do something for your self. Trust me a found out that if you don't it will make eveything ten times harder.


mr steve
Posts: 286
Joined: Sep 2009


how great is it that you can understand jesters and other facial movements to talk with some one. when you told Pat, about the shopping I'm betting you did not have any problems understanding what he was saying...

Rhonda wont even let me out of her sight with the check book...LOL


Tina Blondek's picture
Tina Blondek
Posts: 1566
Joined: Nov 2009

Hello April and Pat
Thanks for the laugh and smile! But...they were the cute boxers! Love it. The blinking eyes are great too. Thanks for keeping your wonderful sense of humor. It helps you as well as us! Give yourself and Pat a great big hug. Can he write to you, and you to him on a dry erase board? Thinking of you both daily :)
Tina in Va

grandmafay's picture
Posts: 1639
Joined: Aug 2009

Humor really keeps us going. I don't know what I would have done if Doug had ever lost his. It kept me sane. Thank goodness he could talk. I really admire you, but I know you are just doing what you have to do and don't see why we should see you as admirable. Everyday Heroes never see themselves as heroic. I just wanted you to know that you continue to be in my thoughts and prayers. Fay

Barbara53's picture
Posts: 658
Joined: Aug 2009

April, just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you and Pat, hoping the peace angel finds you.

Doesn't the idea of dragging the fluid filled sofa section to a secluded field and setting it on fire sound good?

Bet Pat likes those girlie nails and shoes too.

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