CSN Login
Members Online: 5

You are here

The Graduate

aysemari's picture
Posts: 1596
Joined: Dec 2009

Me- I am the chemo graduate.

What a bag of mixed emotions I was today. I was so happy
but couldn't help crying. The nurses were so wonderful. They
pronounced to everyone I was done, then I got to ring a bell!!

I am just scared, I am experiencing some symptoms that led
me to a struggle with my health almost for a year before I got
diagnosed. The same sharp pain in my chest and the same pain
with my sinuses. And nobody could figure out what it was.

I mentioned it to my oncologist and all he offered was antibiotics.
He will also try to schedule a PET scan but he wasn't sure if my
insurance will approve it since I had a mastectomy.

Please send me some good vibes, I feel a little anxious... time
to take out the old yoga mat.


SIROD's picture
Posts: 2199
Joined: Jun 2010

A lot of them.

The bell ringing is kind of nice.

Best to you,


Posts: 33
Joined: Sep 2010

Think positive thoughts and everything will work out!!

hugs to you

missrenee's picture
Posts: 2137
Joined: Apr 2010

How great to be totally done with the drugs. However, I understand your worry with the ongoing issues. I'm going through that a little bit myself right now. Let's hope this wave of symptoms from the past will go away as quickly as they came. Everything will be okay!

Hugs, Renee

jessiesmom1's picture
Posts: 874
Joined: Jun 2010

Congratulations from one graduate to another. Isn't it a wonderful feeling to know that you don't have to walk into the treatment area and have that poison pumped into your body? To know that needles are a thing of the past? To know that your hair WILL start to grow back? To know that you WILL start feeling better? I love the idea that the chemo nurses let you ring a bell to announce you were done. Good luck on finding the source of the chest and sinus problems. May it be a big nothing.

cahjah75's picture
Posts: 2631
Joined: Jun 2010

sending you good vibes. Glad your chemo is done.
{{hugs}} Char

Angie2U's picture
Posts: 2992
Joined: Sep 2009

Sending hugs and congrats!

DianeBC's picture
Posts: 3886
Joined: Jun 2009

Very happy for you! Big congrats!

phoenixrising's picture
Posts: 1511
Joined: Feb 2007

Sending you lots of good vibes and so glad you are finally done. It is such a relief, isn't it?

Ritzy's picture
Posts: 4382
Joined: Aug 2009

Congrats chemo grad! You just completed a huge milestone Ayse!

Sue :)

Posts: 550
Joined: Nov 2009

Sending you good vibes and I am happy you were able to ring the bell that chemo is over for you.

Bella Luna's picture
Bella Luna
Posts: 1579
Joined: Aug 2009

Ayse... First of all... a HUGE Congratulations on finishing up with treatment. I remember ringing that bell. It sure was music to my ears. Great news, I am happy for you.

On another note... regarding your symptoms, take it one step at a time. Try not to jump to conclusions. I know it's easier said than done, but try not to let your imagination run wild with scenarios. You did the right thing and are being an excellent self advocate in letting your doctors know about your situation. In the meanwhile, keep busy, do yoga, do what you love, and follow up with their recommendations.

I will say a prayer for you. Take care, God bless.

Kristin N's picture
Kristin N
Posts: 1969
Joined: Mar 2009

Congrats Ayse!

Pinkpower's picture
Posts: 437
Joined: Jun 2010

Hello Ayse,

Thinking of you and sending you good vibes, hugs and prayers. Congrats on finishing chemo.


sea60's picture
Posts: 2618
Joined: May 2010

I'm praying all will be okay.

Congrats on your "graduation"



DebbyM's picture
Posts: 3293
Joined: Oct 2009

Praying for you Ayse and sending big congrats!

Hugs, Debby

ladyg's picture
Posts: 1577
Joined: Apr 2010

Congrats on being a chemo grad. One more leg of the journey done. I will keep you in my thoughts and send you lots of positive energy.


lynn1950's picture
Posts: 2574
Joined: Jun 2008

Congratulations, Ayse. Finishing chemo is a big step. Since your diagnosis you've been a warrior fighting for your life.

Once diagnosed, we are never the same...sigh.I think once active treatment is finished, we start feeling like we're boxing with shadows. It is so easy to be scared when we notice something not right with our bodies.

Really...get out that yoga mat, girl! And believe me, it does get better and better with time.

Sending you good vibes always.....xoxoxoxo Lynn

Kylez's picture
Posts: 3765
Joined: May 2009

Congratulations! Hoping you will feel better very soon.

Heatherbelle's picture
Posts: 1227
Joined: Jun 2010

CONGRATULATIONS on being done with chemo!!!! I know how wonderful that feels1 Now it's time to rest & recover Ayse :)
I think I'll pull out my yoga mat next to ya and let's get our "namaste" on!
Sending hugs, love, and lots of good mojo!

Posts: 6587
Joined: Oct 2010

Happy for you

fauxma's picture
Posts: 3581
Joined: Dec 2008

So glad that you are done with chemo. I do hope and pray that they find what is causing the pain and sinus problems. So Good Vibes and a big hug coming your way.

Sher43009's picture
Posts: 602
Joined: Nov 2009

YEH! Congrat on being a chemo grad. By any chance did you have Cytoxin? I had that with Adramicyn and always got sinus headaches and face pain. My oncol. nurse told me it's a side effect of Cytoxin. Hope you feel better soon.

aysemari's picture
Posts: 1596
Joined: Dec 2009

I had carbo, taxotere and Herceptin for a year.

The frustrating part is, no one can tell me what is wrong. One
allergy doctor seems to think that I am allergic to mold and here
in Az we have mold spores in the air. Another reason for me to move (;
I was on antibiotics for 8 months of that year and saw so many
doctors to no avail.

It notice it mostly when I am in AC or have my heat running. So
I try to avoid it.

Thanks for the positive vibes!!


aysemari's picture
Posts: 1596
Joined: Dec 2009

I can feel the good vibes coming my way. And
as Heather put it so well. Let's get our Namaste on.. Hahha
And ward off any anxiety.

I can't believe it has been a year!!! WOW
It seems like yesterday that I stumbled over this board all
terrified and blue eyed - no idea what to expect. Thank
you all for taking me under your wings and giving me
advice and support.


DebbyM's picture
Posts: 3293
Joined: Oct 2009

Enjoy your 1 year celebration!

Posts: 6587
Joined: Oct 2010

BUT I am sure same feeling of just having it over with. I dont' remember most of the dates of my BC but I DO remember like yesterday my graduation date....I even got mini framed diploma I keep on my kitchen counter.

I wish you the best...and WILL be thinking of you..?

Denise W.

aysemari's picture
Posts: 1596
Joined: Dec 2009

Fellow Graduate!!

I didn't do rads but I can only imagine how relieved you must feel.

The whole thing looked darn scary to me. So scary that I chose
a mastectomy instead.


Marcia527's picture
Posts: 2749
Joined: Jul 2006

I'll send some of my good vibes. Right now I've got plenty. My DH just found a job after being without for a few years. So you better be sitting cause they are strong super vibes. I think we are allergic to mold also. Isn't Good Vibrations a song by the Beach Boys?

MyTurnNow's picture
Posts: 2690
Joined: Aug 2009

Good job on finishing chemo, I remember that day well. I, too, am sending all the positive vibes I can in hopes that your docs can discover and treat (get rid of) the symptoms you described. Hopefully, once the chemo is out of your system, this task is easier and the culprit is identified. One step at a time. But, in the meantime, completing chemo calls for a celebration.

Posts: 4376
Joined: Jun 2009

Congrats Ayse on finishing chemo!

Hugs, Jan

Dawne.Hope's picture
Posts: 825
Joined: Sep 2009

Congratulations on being done with chemo!

That is something huge and so worthy celebrating!
Get your "Namaste" on and your party hat! ;)
Don't think those two normally go together, but you
so deserve both! :)

I love the image Lynn posted above, "Boxing with shadows."
Does the fear and anxiety ever go away?
Maybe with time.

Prayers for you, dear sister!
Peace, life, hope and health!


Posts: 239
Joined: Nov 2009

Ayse - so happy you are done with your treatments.. You are one of the reasons I come back to these boards each day.. I love reading your positive comments and compassion for the others here.. you seem like such a wonderful person that I wish we could meet in person..(but NY is a long way from AZ!!) I am sending you big hugs and good vibes dear sister...


aysemari's picture
Posts: 1596
Joined: Dec 2009

that is so sweet of you to say. You know, I AM looking into
moving back to the east coast, so who knows we may meet
one day soon.

Thank you for the good vibes, they arrived safely, long distance and all... (:


PinkPearl's picture
Posts: 280
Joined: Oct 2010

Yeaaa! I tried to send good vibes yesterday but my computer was not in good vibe mode! Have you tried a chiropractor for the sinus and chest pain? It might help. I never have been to one but my daughter was referred to one after childbirth for should and neck pain and she and I were amazed that it helped. If you decide to go to one be sure to get some recommendations from your doctor first--not all are created equal in that field.

CypressCynthia's picture
Posts: 4014
Joined: Oct 2009

Sending you healing vibes and lots of prayers. I think it is normal to freak out as our therapy ends--we all want to be doing something--and when we stop it is scary. Even though, of course, we have to stop and stopping is a wonderful graduation to be celebrated. When my breast surgeon, after like 15 years ;-), said to quit coming, I cried.

And if you really believe something else is going on with your body, remember that you have the right to see someone else. It never hurts to get another opinion.

But, for today, go out and celebrate--you deserve it!

Double Whammy's picture
Double Whammy
Posts: 2805
Joined: Jun 2010

Ah, the Beach Boys! I now can't get the doggone song outa my head! So I shall sing (silently, in my head - I can't carry a tune in a bucket) to you and send those good vibrations your way. I hope the chest and sinus thing resolves on its own and just goes away because you're human and you will worry more about it now than before cancer.

A year of chemo is behind you. My wish for you and all the rest of us is to never have to go there again.


pokrydi's picture
Posts: 99
Joined: Feb 2011

WOW how exciting to ring the bell hope I will get to do that in time. only positive thoughts your way =:)

Posts: 132
Joined: Dec 2010

Dear Ayse,

Yes, may it be a big NOTHING. Congratulations from a pre-chemo toddler to a graduate. I also commend the bell.. how awesome is that. Don't worry.... you have MADE it and right now it's time to celebrate! That day for me seems eons away...

VickiSam's picture
Posts: 9085
Joined: Aug 2009

on a job well done. I take from recent photo's, you just finished with Herceptin, right? After a year of chemo .. one tends to what to jump off of an airplane, and into life! Good luck .. Hoping that the positive vibes, and stars align up in your favor, everything comes out clear .. and by sheer luck, you can move back to New York City, to be closed to family and friends.

prayers coming your direction, as well.

Vicki Sam

aysemari's picture
Posts: 1596
Joined: Dec 2009

But honestly once the day is upon you, this is at least true for
me, you are shocked that it is already over. I can't believe it
has been over a year since my diagnosis, I was so fixated in
doing all I can and learning about anything that can help me,
I didn't even notice how fast the time went by.

I am looking forward to the day, You will graduate and I
can congratulate you.


KayNYC's picture
Posts: 495
Joined: Mar 2010

I hear you and I am sending good vibes and positive thoughts. sounds like a good time to pull out that yoga mat too.

hugs, K

KayNYC's picture
Posts: 495
Joined: Mar 2010

I hit the button too fast...congrats on chemo graduation. Try to stay in the moment and plan something you enjoy this weekend. Sending a big hug.


KathiM's picture
Posts: 8077
Joined: Aug 2005

Congrats on the graduation!!!!!

As far as the sinuses, I always have had trouble with mine...blinding headaches at times....EXCEPT during my chemo! I asked about it, and was told that for some cases of migraine headaches, non-cancer related, chemotherapy is used!!!!

Ibuprophen is my 'snake oil', the stuff that really works!

American expatriate hugs, Kathi

natly15's picture
Posts: 1941
Joined: Sep 2009

Ayse you are one amazing gal. I thought you had completed treatment a while ago. You have a marvelous attitude and please dont let worry steal what you need to celebrate, you are a chemo grad. Congrats to you! Get that yoga mat out and relax and relax and relax.

Sounds so strange but it was a happy and sad occasion for me as well when I completed treatment. Our doctors and nurses and staff become family and care just as much about us as our loved ones care. I felt so insulated and cared for during treatment no matter how difficult it was. It felt so good to ring the bell but it was sad to leave the family I saw so frequently. We of course continue to see them but not as often we hope.

Sending prayers and positive vibes to you and hoping you are having a case of allergies and nothing more.

Posts: 6587
Joined: Oct 2010

staff become family we see daily etc...I still stop in my treatment center when I go to my oncologist (same building -different floors) just to say hi to everyone. It's been about 2 1/2 yrs they still remember me by name, give me a hug etc..etc..

Subscribe to Comments for "The Graduate"