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vinny59's picture
Posts: 1032
Joined: Nov 2006

Hi guy's so many of you asked how I was feeling and that is why I love this site! I talk about you guy's a lot at work and with my family. People look at me at work and say how great I look, but they can't understand the way I feel like you all do. I really start to tank by 11am, you all know the feeling. I get done from my ten hour day and I feel so fatigued and all I want to do is go to bed! When I start feeling down, I think of all my friends on this site, especially the ones that are still going thru the battle everyday. You know what, suddenly it's not so bad! Wishing good health for everyone...... Vinny

merrywinner's picture
Posts: 627
Joined: Aug 2009

So glad to hear from you. Boy do I ever know that"tanked" feeling you mention. Recently it has been much better, but it is gradual for sure. I am further out from my last treatment then you are. In fact it surprised me to realize that in just 2 months it will be a year since my last treatment, in April,2010! At least for me the recovery has taken most of that year. So hang in there, as I know you will. Sometimes the gains are so gradual that you can only pick them up on hindsight. God bless and take care. Mary

JoanieP's picture
Posts: 573
Joined: Mar 2010

Hi Vinny
I had my last chemo July 2009 and it took a good year to feel somewhat normal. Have I ever been normal:) The prescription vitamin D really helped. Take care

COBRA666's picture
Posts: 2413
Joined: May 2010

I can just imagine you dragging A$$. This crap really drains us. I see posts all the time where people that have gone thru all this and say the energy level will return in time. I sure hope so. I just started some vitamin D otc pills.They are only 600mgs. so I may have to get the 2000mgs from what I read. I have been out for 3 1/2 months and it is very gradual getting real energy back. One day at a time. John(FNHL-1-4A-5/10)

allmost60's picture
Posts: 3184
Joined: Jul 2010

Hi Vinny...
I love hearing news from you because when I first joined the group last July you were at your worst and you seemed to go from bad to worse for the following months thereafter. Man...you kept me awake more than one night with worrying...but...eventually you pulled through to where you are today, which really gave me a ton of hope and encouragement. When I would be at my worst(on the nasty pred) I would say to myself.."buck up Susie..think about Vinny"..then I would put myself in check and quit dwelling on how bad I felt. You had such a good positive attitude even when you were at your worst! That really helped me get through treatments! I'm still bone tired 95% of the time and not anywhere near where I want to be, but I keep reminding myself that my last chemo was on Dec 14th and it's far too soon to expect a huge gain in energy level. I'm just thrilled you are even able to work and it amazes me that you work 10 hour days...my work day here at home consists of half hour increments...ha! Hang in there Vinny...your my shining star!
Sue (FNHL-2-3A-6/10)

vinny59's picture
Posts: 1032
Joined: Nov 2006

Thanks everyone for the kind words! It just makes me feel better when I hear that everyone has the same symptoms after treatment. I will take it a day at a time! Sue it is always easier to laugh then cry!!!! LOL

Posts: 592
Joined: Jul 2009

Yup Vinny I'm right with you. I actually had energy for several days but today it is gone. I'm amazed you can work 10 hour days but like Mary says energy will get better. And laughing is so much better than crying. Think laughing gives me more energy.

merrywinner's picture
Posts: 627
Joined: Aug 2009

Do you have that too? I have several days of more energy and then back down. But I have been noticing, if I think about it, that the energy days are increasing and the tired I feel is not the same fatigue that I had with the chemo and recovery. Things are changing so hang in there all!! Mary
PS: I agree with the laughing and since I am fairly silly I practice often.

merrywinner's picture
Posts: 627
Joined: Aug 2009

What a super nice post to read. You are so kind and genuine. Yes it is too soon for you to expect much yet. The drugs are still there somewhat and if they're there they are still working. Remember the water. I always had to remind myself to flush out the junk and I think it helps all around. Your energy will come but it is slow,so keep resting when you need to. You will know when it is time to do more,I think it may happen just when you need it to, Grandma!! My daughters babies helped me a lot. They we're born 6 weeks after my last treatment and while I couldn't do all that I wanted, I made myself do enough. It brought so much happiness that it helped me get by. I can hardly wait for your new Bitsy to arrive. Take care. Mary

onlytoday's picture
Posts: 603
Joined: Jun 2010


Thank you so much for the update. I've been thinking about you. I went back to work one month after treatment ended (stupid, stupid, stupid) and have been paying for it ever since with infection after infection. I was home again all last week because of it.

But... the good news is that YOU are doing this! And 10 hour days no less!! You are an inspiration to many of us with that positive attitude and fight!! Keep it up.

I'm going back to work tomorrow and will continue to try to put in full days!! It's very good for me to stay active and involved - it helps me cope. (Now that's just me - not everyone has that same need)

And I agree with you that our friends here are such an amazing group and each and every one inspires and lifts us up when we need it.

I'll say a prayer at 11am tomorrow that you get a surge of energy!! (Hey - it can't hurt!) And boy can I relate to that ! :)


NMZ NHL stage IV 05/10 REMISSION 01/11/11

Posts: 444
Joined: Aug 2010

Yeah, what a great group this is for our support!!

Vinny, you are amazing working 10 hours. Don't you think you are pushing yourself too hard? I see my hubby keep going, going and going till I tell him to slow down and get to bed!!

I will return to work half time by March 31st. But there came up an unfortunate surprise - last week, I was informed that my co-worker who takes over my cases quit abruptly due to her health problems (migrianes and at age 63, she can not wait longer to retire)! Yesterday, I went to meet with her to get the feel about her work before she will leave for good this Thurs. I went into my work building for the first time since August. It was Sunday and nobody but us there. My first reaction was emotional - almost in shock to be back but then glad to be back because I am still alive. Then I was able to move on and was at this meeting for 2 hours. I don't feel the same as I was before - talking about my new physical self! Already I got exhausted. Hey, I tell myself NOT to work in that building until March 31st! I let my boss work on this. I gotta rest but not easy to do when I worry about my program...

Vinny, it is good to hear from ya!

(HL-4B,8/2010 Remission 12/2010)

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