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forme's picture
forme
Posts: 1162
Joined: Aug 2010

Hi All,
Feeling like I am all over the place with my emotions. Sometimes I feel so strong and then it just crashes around me. I'm sure some of it has to do with the stress of the funeral and having the sis in law stay with us. But, other times I just start thinking about my future and start to get scared, I think?
I have been reading your posts and feeling such joy as so many of you reach remission. Some of you are almost there. I hope that the day will come when I too can say the word once more.
I am still waiting to hear about a few remaing test results, I am not expecting to hear much change. But you never know.. I was a bit surprised to know of the lung tumor.
I'll update you as I learn the results.
Have a lovely start to your week.
peaceful healing
Lisha

COBRA666's picture
COBRA666
Posts: 2413
Joined: May 2010

Lisha,
I know how that waiting crap can get to you. I know how I felt waiting for my test results. Just waiting for the test can be so exhausting. Then when you have other things going on it really compounds matters even worse. Just keep hanging in there. We are with you. John(FNHL-1-4A-5/10)

forme's picture
forme
Posts: 1162
Joined: Aug 2010

Hi John,
Thanks for the support. I'm trying to do my best to hang in, but I do have my moments..
I hope that when sis in law goes home to FL things will become a lot calmer around our place. I find that all I do is care for her now and comfort her. She is very 'needy" right now. It's hard to put me on the back shelf all the time. Oh well, I am rambling on.
Lisha

miss maggie
Posts: 929
Joined: Mar 2010

Hi Lisha,

Just read your 2 posts. Sorry I missed them when I signed on before. It doesn't surprise me your emotions are all over the place. Think about it. You have been on one big rollar coaster ride that keeps going and going. You're only human. Don't be too hard on yourself. You have been so strong and resilient for everyone including yourself, it's OK to fall down.
Yes, when your sister-in-law goes home, you will feel so much better. No way, don't put yourself on the back shelf. You know the rule, take one day at a time. I am so sorry that today you are feeling hopeless and scared. Hopefully tomorrow the sun will shine for you and your thoughts will be more positive.

Everyone on the site, including myself have our arms around you. You are not alone on this journey.

Love Maggie

truckingalong
Posts: 444
Joined: Aug 2010

Keep on rambling - we are behind you! You are in a difficult position having to care so much for others but yourself. Take a breath, refocus and take a break.

Warm hugs,
Liz

COBRA666's picture
COBRA666
Posts: 2413
Joined: May 2010

Lisha,
I know how that waiting crap can get to you. I know how I felt waiting for my test results. Just waiting for the test can be so exhausting. Then when you have other things going on it really compounds matters even worse. Just keep hanging in there. We are with you. John(FNHL-1-4A-5/10)

COBRA666's picture
COBRA666
Posts: 2413
Joined: May 2010

Lisha,
I know how that waiting crap can get to you. I know how I felt waiting for my test results. Just waiting for the test can be so exhausting. Then when you have other things going on it really compounds matters even worse. Just keep hanging in there. We are with you. John(FNHL-1-4A-5/10)

allmost60's picture
allmost60
Posts: 3184
Joined: Jul 2010

Hi Lisha,
To be strong for everyone else and also deal with your own health issues is a huge task, and in my opinion, you have really been put to the test above and beyond normal limits!!! I don't know many people that could of handled all of this as well as you have. Finding out you have a tumor in your lung was really scary, I'm sure!! Lets just hope and pray that MDA will come up with a plan after all of the test results are in. I will be thinking good positive thoughts and keeping you in my prayers. Like John said..we are here for you and wishing only good results and more peaceful times...soon!
Much love to you...Sue (FNHL-2-3A-6/10)

vinny59's picture
vinny59
Posts: 1032
Joined: Nov 2006

Hey Lisha, it's very hard to stay positive. I have my first PET scan the 25th and all I have be doing is "thinking", but then I say to my self, that this is out of my hands. Keep the faith.......... Vinny

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