Dec 31, 2010 - 9:15 am
It is now 11 days since you went to be with Jesus. Today is New Year's Eve and I find myself remembering the last 31 years that we were blessed with our love, with our lives. So bittersweet, as I know that you are in a glorious place, no more chemo, no more anxiety about scans and labs, no more pain. For this my heart rejoices. For your absence, my heart is broken. Tonight at midnight, I will not feel your passionate kiss and embrace as the New Year begins. My heart aches. The excitement that we always shared at the prospect of a better year filled with love and joy will not be there for me tonight. I don't know what I will feel. So much love surrounds me at this time and I know I must look ahead and try one day at a time to begin to live this new life without you. I know that God will be holding me and encouraging me to live and love life again, not in the old way, but in a new way. I shall miss your arms tonight.