Hospice

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cfight
cfight Member Posts: 69
edited March 2014 in Esophageal Cancer #1
My father has been fighting Stage IV EC cancer since last December. He decided yesterday it was time to stop treatments. There was one remaining tumor in his liver and the treatments have had no impact -- in fact a new hot spot had appeared. The past 6 weeks have been very difficult for him -- his lack of appetite and fatigue has caused him to lose 35 pounds. I feel very fortunate that my mother, an oncology nurse has been able to provide care and support to him during this challenging time.

At home hospice was called in and they have been wonderful --making dad feel comfortable is our top priority. I have to say that I did not expect to have a sense of peace at this stage. Even today, my father had more energy in his voice that I had not seen in weeks. A weight has been lifted off all of our shoulders.

I was curious to know if anyone had experienced these same feelings. This is a challenging journey for all and I certainly did not expect these thoughts as we entered into the new chapter.

Thank you so much for all of your support... direct and indirect. Your stories of courage, hope and determination have been an inspiration to me.


-Carolyn

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  • Unknown
    Unknown
    #2
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  • LivingFaith
    LivingFaith Member Posts: 74
    #3
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    unknown said:

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    peace
    It is a different kind of peace. I'm sure with your mom being a nurse she will stay on top of hospice to make sure he is comfortable.

    Our experience was mixed with hospice. Once we all got on the same page of our expectations, it was a blessing. We just had to be very clear that we wanted dad calm and comfortable, even if that meant he was not as alert. We all had said everything we wanted him to know so we were fine with the sedation. It seemed more caring since my dad was very very restless. He was able to have a peaceful passing.

    I felt some guilt about the "weight" off my shoulders when he entered hospice and even when he passed. It has been 12 days since he flew with his angels Home, and the guilt of wondering "did we do enough?" did we make the right choices in care, and all those kind of questions are slowing being replaced by peace. Peace we always did our best to make dad's life as happy and comfortable to the very end. Peace his is free from suffering.

    Praying for peace,strength, and comfort to you and your family.


    Deb
  • cfight
    cfight Member Posts: 69
    #4
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    LivingFaith said:

    peace
    It is a different kind of peace. I'm sure with your mom being a nurse she will stay on top of hospice to make sure he is comfortable.

    Our experience was mixed with hospice. Once we all got on the same page of our expectations, it was a blessing. We just had to be very clear that we wanted dad calm and comfortable, even if that meant he was not as alert. We all had said everything we wanted him to know so we were fine with the sedation. It seemed more caring since my dad was very very restless. He was able to have a peaceful passing.

    I felt some guilt about the "weight" off my shoulders when he entered hospice and even when he passed. It has been 12 days since he flew with his angels Home, and the guilt of wondering "did we do enough?" did we make the right choices in care, and all those kind of questions are slowing being replaced by peace. Peace we always did our best to make dad's life as happy and comfortable to the very end. Peace his is free from suffering.

    Praying for peace,strength, and comfort to you and your family.


    Deb

    Thank you so much William
    Thank you so much William and Deb. I have been so humbled by the advice and encouragement by strangers. I cannot thank you enough for your ongoing support. It has been a challenging Christmas, but we have all found our inner strength. Merry Christmas!
  • Unknown
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  • jojoshort
    jojoshort Member Posts: 230 Member
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    unknown said:

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    Thanks for all the info on Hospice and your experiences
    Tomorrow, we see the doc and tell him, "No more chemo". Steve--my sweet husband of 32 years and only age 54-- has been having a very rough time this past week with extreme fatigue, nausea and barely eating anything. Cancer-doc is trying to mitigate this, but he's "done" with chemo, he says, and I couldn't agree more. He's had 6 sessions of FOLFOX6 and two of Irinotecan--one with Platinol. He's a Stage IVb, so we were waiting for him to make up his own mind of when to call it quits on the "big cannons". The weight loss has been dramatic. Despite this, he emphatically does NOT want a feeding tube of any kind. His journey.

    We will call in Hospice and let them make him comfortable and maybe even get his mojo back for some nice summer fun. All the chemo did was hit the "pause" button on his tumor, with maybe a tad of reduction, but he isn't one of the lucky ones who get a complete response.

    Your comments and experiences here on Hospice have confirmed that this is going to be a good thing for us as a family. He needs to be as comfortable as possible now.

    Thanks for listening,
    Jojo

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