My dad's gift to me and my family

MRapp226
MRapp226 Member Posts: 44
edited March 2014 in Esophageal Cancer #1
Hi all. For those of you that don't know me, I lost my dad to this dreadful disease on August 29, 2010. He was only 54 years old and was officially disgnosed on August 9th and passed away on August 29th. To say that I wasn't able to process what happened is the understatement of the year. I have had a really tough time trying to get through this as I was / am soooo angry... angry at him for not being honest with us about how he felt, angry at the doctors for not being able to do anything for him and angry at God for allowing this to happen to the most caring man I have ever known. Why him???!! I found this blog and realized, "Why any of us??!!??" All I know is that life is unfair at times and I must put on my "big girl" pants and deal with it... Move on. Like many of you, I have found one day to be bearable and another to be unbearable but we have to struggle through it. The holidays are especially hard and not a single day goes by that I don't think of him.

Why the subject of my post??!! Well, my husband and I were unable to conceive a child and were told that it wouldn't happen for us two years ago. My parents were disappointed but truly embraced their grandpup as they realized that my husband and I had a full life and they just wanted us to be happy. Well, the weekened prior to Thanksgiving, I wasn't feeling well and googled my symptons. The information that came back to me all lead me to believe that I was pregnant. My hubby and I were in total shock. Well, I am happy to report that I am 8 weeks and 5 days pregnant with what I am positive will be a little boy. I am pretty sure that my dad talked to God and well, a miracle happened. My dad left a seat at the table for another to fill it. And, I know he is watching us everyday and gave us this blessing to fill our empty hearts with joy.

Everyone told me when my dad passed away that now I would have an angel watching over me. At the time, I didn't want that... I wanted HIM HERE but now know how true it is about the angels in our life. Just because they are not physically with us here on earth, they will always be here in spirit. I love and miss my dad every day. Even though he won't be here to meet my child, I know he will be a part of his / her life if only in memory but I am pretty sure he will visit.

-Melissa

Comments

  • mrsbotch
    mrsbotch Member Posts: 349
    Your miracle
    Melissa,

    I am crying my eyes out from joy for you and your husband . What a wonderful gift from God your baby will be . Your dad for sure had a part of this and will watch over all of you for the rest of your lives. God Bless all of you and Have a Very Merry Christmas.

    Barbara
  • GerryS
    GerryS Member Posts: 227 Member
    Merry Christmas.......
    Melissa, Tears are flowing down my cheeks as I write this letter to you. You had every reason to be angry and now you have every reason to be overjoyed at the news of your baby. Take this from a grandfather of 6, your dads love and memories will live on thru you and you will share many wonderful stories with your child. Congrats and God Bless you as you have conveyed a part of life that is so real to so many of us.
    Gerry
  • Tina Blondek
    Tina Blondek Member Posts: 1,500 Member
    Thank You for Sharing
    Dearest Melissa
    What wonderful news! Congratulations to you and your husband. It does happen that way sometimes. Your dad had to pass before your child could be conceived. Amazing. Take care of yourself and have a wonderful pregnancy. I lost my dad also in March 2010. I am sure our dads are now our guardian angels :)
    Tina in Va
  • Donna70
    Donna70 Member Posts: 852 Member

    Thank You for Sharing
    Dearest Melissa
    What wonderful news! Congratulations to you and your husband. It does happen that way sometimes. Your dad had to pass before your child could be conceived. Amazing. Take care of yourself and have a wonderful pregnancy. I lost my dad also in March 2010. I am sure our dads are now our guardian angels :)
    Tina in Va

    Melissa, what a story!!
    Hi Melissa,
    What a wonderful story and what a gift!!!! I think the same thing that our loved ones look out for us and intercede for us. You will always miss your Dad but your baby will be a good reminder of his love. It is a most wonderful Christmas story. thanks so much for sharing it with us. take care,
    Donna70
  • Brian1958
    Brian1958 Member Posts: 3
    Merry Christmas!!!
    Dear Melissa,
    I can't begin to express the joy that is in my heart for coming accross your post, particularly at this time of year. You brought me to tears, as well, hearing the love that your dad had for you, so great that he didn't want to burden you with the way he felt. And, now knowing that he is still there for you, every step of the way.

    God bless you and yours, and have a very Merry Christmas!!!
  • sal314
    sal314 Member Posts: 599 Member
    Congratulations Melissa!
    Just goes to show you that doctor's don't know everything! We had our own little miracle girl 5 years ago after we were told I had a less than 3% chance of having my own child. They recommended using "donor eggs" as my treatment for breast cancer had pretty much damaged my ovary...yeah...I only had one ovary too since I had to have the one removed because of a scare of cancer. Well, needless to say, we didn't believe in doing that nor did we have 20 grand sitting in our pockets! We prayed and left it in God's hands. If it were ment to be, it would hapeen. We're so happy it did!!

    Anyway, God is good! Yes, life is unfair and God never promised it wouldn't be! Actually, He warns us and tells us that in this life we will have troubles, but He has overcome the world and if we put our trust in Him he will carry us through anything!

    So...enjoy the gift. Take care of yourself and rest now, because you won't get much once he makes his appearance! :)

    Blessings,

    Sally
  • DanaMB3
    DanaMB3 Member Posts: 98
    Congratulations
    Melissa, I am so sorry for the loss of your dad. Mine (66 years old) was just diagnosed last week (stage 3 possibly moving into stage 4). I am 35 and now have 2 children, but suffered through miscarriages so know a touch of what you have dealt with.

    Congratulations to you - that IS a wonderful gift your dad has given you. He must be smiling huge up there. :) Hopefully this new gift will make the holidays at least a little bit easier and give you comfort that you know your dad is still "taking care of you".
  • unclaw2002
    unclaw2002 Member Posts: 599
    Melissa,
    What a wonderful

    Melissa,

    What a wonderful story. I too have tears in my eyes after reading your post. A Christmas miracle - a such a gift for you and your entire family. I too am a daughter of a dad and while he is still here I know that the days are numbered. It sounds like your father had a wonderful life and family although he wasn't here long enough.

    I will keep you in my prayers and keep us posted on your pregnancy and of course baby pictures once your little guy is born.

    Best,
    Cindy
  • MOE58
    MOE58 Member Posts: 589 Member
    They say one has to leave this earth to receive another happines
    Hi Melissa,

    I don't post much but as i was reading your message brought thoughts to my mind, I lost my Dad in feb 05 to colon cancer, I was very close to him, and we had cried and cried and was having a hard time, until my youngest daughter in December of 05 told us on Christmas day that she was pregnant that was something to be happy about well 5 months later we found out it was a BOY!!!! He was the first GREAT GRANDSON, on my side in 77 years, no he didn't carry on the name but it was a boy, my dad's birthday was JULY 2, 1927 well he wasn't due until July 22, but I guess my angel up above had something different in mind cause she delivered A HEALTH BEAUTIFUL BABY BOY ON JULY 2, 2006, he is my pride and joy and the funny thing is he acts just like my dad and laughs just like my dad, so a miracle happend for us the following year after loosing my dad,

    They always say when GOD closes a door he opens a window or vice versa and I truly believe that.

    I know you and your husband is elated knowing that you are expecting your first child and I truly believe it will be a boy and born on a special day for you two.


    We all wonder why GOD does some things at times but he always does it for a reason.

    I wish you all the best and please let us know when you find out if its a boy.

    CONGRATS, just wanted to share my story too thought it might help

    Lori/aka moe58
  • MRapp226
    MRapp226 Member Posts: 44
    MOE58 said:

    They say one has to leave this earth to receive another happines
    Hi Melissa,

    I don't post much but as i was reading your message brought thoughts to my mind, I lost my Dad in feb 05 to colon cancer, I was very close to him, and we had cried and cried and was having a hard time, until my youngest daughter in December of 05 told us on Christmas day that she was pregnant that was something to be happy about well 5 months later we found out it was a BOY!!!! He was the first GREAT GRANDSON, on my side in 77 years, no he didn't carry on the name but it was a boy, my dad's birthday was JULY 2, 1927 well he wasn't due until July 22, but I guess my angel up above had something different in mind cause she delivered A HEALTH BEAUTIFUL BABY BOY ON JULY 2, 2006, he is my pride and joy and the funny thing is he acts just like my dad and laughs just like my dad, so a miracle happend for us the following year after loosing my dad,

    They always say when GOD closes a door he opens a window or vice versa and I truly believe that.

    I know you and your husband is elated knowing that you are expecting your first child and I truly believe it will be a boy and born on a special day for you two.


    We all wonder why GOD does some things at times but he always does it for a reason.

    I wish you all the best and please let us know when you find out if its a boy.

    CONGRATS, just wanted to share my story too thought it might help

    Lori/aka moe58

    Thank you all!!!!!
    Thank you for all of your well wishes!!!!!!!!!!!! Sorry that I haven't been on lately. Christmas was harder than I thought it would be. There was an emptiness inside of me that just wouldn't go away. I am sure many of you felt that as well.

    I promise to keep all of you posted. My wish for you is that you and / or your loved ones be well... Stay strong.

    -Melissa
  • MOE58
    MOE58 Member Posts: 589 Member
    MRapp226 said:

    Thank you all!!!!!
    Thank you for all of your well wishes!!!!!!!!!!!! Sorry that I haven't been on lately. Christmas was harder than I thought it would be. There was an emptiness inside of me that just wouldn't go away. I am sure many of you felt that as well.

    I promise to keep all of you posted. My wish for you is that you and / or your loved ones be well... Stay strong.

    -Melissa

    let us know what it is
    Please let us know what it is so we know how blessed it will be

    thanks