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VanessaN's picture
VanessaN
Posts: 8
Joined: Oct 2010

Hi everyone my name is Vanessa I have been dignosed with cervical cancer. Im not sure what stage as of yet but my dignoses is fairly new I found out Oct 11 and then saw the oncolgist the following week she said I have a 5cm tumor in my cervix.
Next week Im getting a PET/CT and anther some scan that my dr ordered today.
Im very scared about everything.
Im going for surgery Nov 16 im having a hysterctomy done my overies will be kept because the dr doesnt want to throw me into early menopause Im 27.
Im a single mother so I have to be strong for my children especially my 8yr old son who has aspergers but Im scared Im so scared.
I dont think I have ever been so scared in all my life.
Almost 9months ago I lost my youngest daughters father to stomach cancer.
There is apart of me that feels like I am being punished because I really didnt believe him at first it wasn't till Jan that I believed him and he died in feb, well I should say I didnt believe how bad it was till Jan when his mom called me.
Is there any advice anyone can give me such as what questions to ask the Drs and so on

Thanks Vanessa!

nempark
Posts: 683
Joined: Apr 2010

You came to the right place the sisters here will be able to give you much advice. I can just imagine how shocked you are to learn of this dreaded disease, we were all there. It's also okay to be scared, scared of the unknown, but you have a good thing on your side, you have your youth. Today, medicine has come along way and with a positive attitude you will be able to conquer this monster. I am sure lots of the sisters are going to respond to you and give you really good advice. I see you already have a date set for surgery. When you see your doctor, take a pad and pen and write everything down, also it would be best if you take someone with you because you will not hear everything. It was also advised here on board to ask immediately for copies of all your scans and blood work just in case you have to change hospitals or change doctors. After surgery your doc will tell you what type of cancer it is and what stage and grade. Then they will advise you of treatment. Try to keep calm and start preparing to be strong so you can be there for your children. How much children do you have? What about your immediate family? Mom, dad and siblings? Okay, dear, I will keep you in my prayers and will be looking forward to your updates. My sympathy go out to you on the death of your child's father. Please do not be too hard on yourself for that, you now have to focus on yourself and get yourself better soon. Please keep in touch. I send you and your children lots of love and comfort at this time. Be strong. one of the ladies on this board said this "we are like teabags, we never know how strong we are until we are in hot water" So be strong darling, and be well. June. Oh! you can start building up your immune system before surgery, iron, folic acid and immune builders.

VanessaN's picture
VanessaN
Posts: 8
Joined: Oct 2010

Thanks so much you gave me ideas I never thought about like bring a pad and paper, you are so right when the dr talks to me its like she is talking to someone else and Im sitting there nodding my head. Asking of copies of everythiing I will do that as I was supposed to be moving out of state but since this hit Im waiting till I have more answers.
I do live with my mom because Im kind of her caregivier she has RSD it damages the nerves and she gets around in a scooter, she has custody of my nephew my sister took off (long story)and my father well......yeah he is somewhere
My church and my kids school are helping with meals when Im in the hospital so that will help ease my mind my mom doesnt cook.
I have 3 children 12 (yes I was very very young when I had her) and and 8 and 6 yr old and my nephew will be 13 soon.
I have a very very good friend who come to my appts with me but he didnt come to the very first oncolgist with him mainly because I told him I was fine and can do it and I wish I hadnt but from now on he will be sitting right next to me.
Thanks
I am really glad I found this network

Always Hopeful
Posts: 234
Joined: May 2010

You certainly have a full plate with three kids, a nephew and an ill mom. Thankfully, it sounds like you have support from your church and your kids' school. The good friend you referred to is another blessing.

I have learned that it is best not to handle this alone. I always try to have someone with me for doc appts, as well as for treatments. Their job is to write down everything that is discussed or has happened in a notebook. I have, in fact, just started a 2nd notebook. My first book proved to be invaluable when I went for a second opinion and they wanted a chronological "story" of my experience...dates of doc visits, dates of various tests, discussions with docs, etc. There is no way I could have provided them with the info if I didn't have my book.

My prayers and thoughts are with you as you continue your journey.

Peace and hope, JJ

Teemac
Posts: 26
Joined: Sep 2010

VANESSA YOU HAVE COME TO THE RIGHT PLACE. I WAS DIAGNOSE SEPTEMBER 22ND, 2010. I AM HAVING SURGERY NEXT WEEK. I HAVE LEARNED SO MUCH FROM BEING PART OF THIS COMMUNITY. THE WOMEN ON THIS SITE ARE SOME OF THE STRONGEST YOU WILL EVER MEET. JUST FROM MY EXPERIENCE SO FAR A COUPLE OF THINGS I CAN NOT STRESS ENOUGH TO YOU IS TO GET COPIES OF EVERYTHING. VERIFY THE REULTS AND MAKE SURE YOU ARE WORKING WITH A DR THAT YOU ARE COMFORTABLE WITH. ASK QUESTIONS. THIS SITE CAN ANSWER ALOT OF THE QUESTIONS YOU HAVE. RESEARCH ANYTHING YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND UNTILL YOU DO UNDERSTAND IT. MOST IMPORTANT TAKE THINGS ONE STEP AT A TIME AND SURROUND YOURSELF WITH LOTS OF POSTIVE ENERGY. I WILL BE PRAYING FOR YOU AND YOUR FAMILY.

TEE

daisy366's picture
daisy366
Posts: 1493
Joined: Mar 2009

It is VERY confusing and scary getting the C word!! I remember my initiation. I agree that you did the best you could with the advice given. That's one problem with laproscopic and robotic surgery - they don't get the best view and maybe it's hard to take all those nodes out. I had the old fashion slice and dice variety.

Here's my 2 cents. I think CA treatment is a crap shoot.
1) Check out NCCN.com and use this info as your guide for standard protocols
2) I think docs like to give us minimal info so we don't get scared. Ask questions, get copies of your records, and be proactive. YOU are the one that will be making the decisions and you need the best information for this. there are many opinions on recommended treatment.
3) Get another opinion if you want. Most insurances will pay for at least one.
4) if you don't already, get a gynecologic-oncologist - they are the EXPERTS we need.
5) ask for an assay/functional profile from your surgery - hopefully they did this. This will tell them the best chemo to give you. This is important!!
6) I have a port - love it!
7) Check out alternative treatments too - diet, meditation, yoga, healing touch, accupuncture, exercise. These have helped me alot.
8) Lower your stress level. I worked almost FT until recently. I'm taking medical leave now and realize I should have done this long ago. Stress lowers immune system and will not help anything!!!
9) use this board but my docs always frown on it saying info is "unfiltered" which is true. So you will get all kinds of feedback. I think most of it is good.
10) stay as positive as you can. Ask for help.

My saga - I'll be brief - I have grade 3 papillary serous endometrial cancer initially given stage 3a. Initial tx: 6 rounds of carboplatin and taxol. No radiation. I had over a year treatment free until recurrence in May 2010. My CT/PET scans all showed activity in lymph system - however, interestingly, my nodes from surgery were all negative (so much for that "peace of mind"). Docs thought it was false positive but 2 years later it probably was stage 4 from beginning. Grim thought. Anyway, I have recurrence in supraclavicular lymph nodes (collarbone area) and I'm getting chemo (carboplatin) and radiation and docs think I have good chance of another remission period. Papillary serous, UPSC for short, is notorious for being chronic or incurable whichever word you like to hear - neither, I'm sure. If you have this (it's considered grade 3 and you probably don't), stay vigilant!!

So, don't give up. It is so overwhelming at first. Docs have lots of tools at their disposal. If you need to vent 1-1 my email is daisyelder@comcast.net.

Best wishes and many blessings to you. Mary Ann

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