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Dad's fight is over after only 10 months

Posts: 30
Joined: Dec 2009

Hi All

My dad died early Tuesday morning. It was 1 month past his 70th birthday.
In the end he was having so much trouble breathing and his heart couldn't take it anymore.
Mom heard him fall on bathroom floor and had to perform CPR on speaker phone while waiting for paramedics. Mom just had a knee replacement 1 1/2 wks ago & this was extremely rough on her. He never got to sign a DNR so a breathing tube was inserted and they had to keep up chest thrusts every 5-10 mins or so to keep his heart going.
He was told in the beginning he would have about 1 1/2 years but we only had him 10 months.
The last few months were hard on him with thoracentesis, pleurodesis, transfusions, pains trouble breathing and chemo.
He just wanted a little more time to perfect his grandsons' golf swings and help the youngest with his batting.
Two days before he died he just wanted to lie on the floor because he was sooo weak and didn't want help to get up. The day before he died was like a miracle. he had on his oxygen but wasn't having labored breathing. We were talking about pssibly giving chemo a rest and start hospice and see if he would get any stronger.He spoke on the phone with some of his old friends from his teen years without any trouble. He even ate a little. He was very calm and relaxed. During the last week he was very depressed and anxious & I don't think he took his meds correctly. He seemed to be a little delusional at times.
During the last 6 months we lost his brother to Non Hodgkins, his mom to heart failure and just last week his dog died at 12 yrs. Thursdays won't be the same. Every Thursday I took dad & my portfloio filled with test results, doctor's visits' notes, meds list,& questions for the dr.to the oncologist's office for either a doctor visit, blood work or chemo.
I feel like there is a hole in my heart. This cancer is horrible. I especially go crazy when I see people smoking and think how stupid they are. I want to tell them about my dad & about his life with cancer and about how much his grandsons and his family will miss him.

Good Bye Dad.

Posts: 829
Joined: Aug 2010

So sorry to hear about your dad. Sounds like you really loved him and I know you'll miss him alot. My mom always said that parents are the wheels and kids are the spokes & when we lose one of the wheels, it's hard to go on. Hang in there & be there for your mom cause she'll really need you now. "Carole"

Glenna M's picture
Glenna M
Posts: 1576
Joined: May 2009

I am so sorry to hear about your father's passing. I know how hard this is as I have lost several immediate family members to cancer also but I want you to know that it will eventually get easier. From reading your posts I know you were there for your father throughout his treatment and were a loving daughter.

Please try to remember your father from all the good times and great memories you made together and know that he will always be there in your heart.

My sincerest condolences,

hope0310's picture
Posts: 324
Joined: May 2010


I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your father.

Take care...Elysia

Posts: 57
Joined: Jun 2010

Hi Legendsdaughter

You and your family are in my prayers at this difficult time.

Which type of lung cancer did your dad have?

My father has Mesothelioma. He was diagnosed in May 2010. It is inoperable. He is in the process of radiation now. They are giving him the highest dose there is.


Posts: 30
Joined: Dec 2009

Hi there and thanks. Just came home from dad's wake and his funeral is tomorrow.

Dad had stage IV adenocarcinoma. He was diagnosed in November, after 2 yrs of cardiologist visits complaining of chest pains and only ekgs being performed, NEVER a chest xray. Not until he saw a pulmonologist who finally did a chest xray & diagnosed him with emphysema. Then he had a PET scan & was he diagnosed with lung cancer, which was at that point, now in both lungs and adrenal gland. Two yrs wasted. He survived only 10 months. We thought that the
1 1/2 yrs given to him as a prognosis was bad. We would have gladly taken that over 10 mths.
But he wsa breathing badly even with oxygen at the end; suffering too much.
Dad's treatment was:
1)carboplatin and pemetrexed 2)radiation 3)cispatin and gemcitabine 4)taxotere
Dad also had a port put in after 1st treatment, "2" Thoracenteses and a pleurodesis. He had three transfusions. During the last few weeks he developed neuropathy in his hands and feet, and also thrush from the Taxotere.

Posts: 30
Joined: Dec 2009
stayingcalm's picture
Posts: 654
Joined: Feb 2007

I wish there were some way I could help.

Miss Bella's picture
Miss Bella
Posts: 19
Joined: Oct 2010

I am so very sorry for your loss.
Miss Bella

DEVIN1016's picture
Posts: 6
Joined: Aug 2010

I am so very sorry for your loss. My Mom was diagnosed on 05/27 and she passed away on 09/23, just 2 weeks before her 56th birthdday. We only had 4 months with her. I understand the hurt you are going through and I send my deepest sympathies to you and your family. Hang in there.

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